visitors when LO is here!

[highhopes19]

another thread i just saw on here made me think about somthing that i hadnt even considered before....

with LO being due 1st november, this is the time of the year when colds and flus go around like anything .

well i live with my parents, were all getting the flu jab for various reasons, mine asthmatic and my dad is, my mum is a nurse and my dads carer....my sister refuses to have it done as she does have a very genunine phobia of needles to the point where she faints, has panic attacks and throws up .

anyway... i mentioned to her about telling visitors not to come round if theyve been ill recently or live with somone that is ill at the moment.... i dont think im being unreasonable by asking this .

but my sister said... "well you might aswell not take her out then, as she can get a cold just going out the house" very true i know, but surely being delibratly around the bug/virus is a bit different to catching it by accident .

am i just being OTT?

xxx

 

[HappiestMom]

Im assuming you are talking about my thread lol lol..and I think its a lot more likely of them catching something from someone that is on top of them/holding them/ etc than just from passing someone out in the store..especially since you can get those carseat covers (which we are getting) to shield baby from unwanted touches and stuff in public..and since most strangers..or I would hope so..wont just come over and start touching your baby like family and friends will

 

[sazibubba]

no your not hun, you want the best for your LO im worried about others kissing my bubba and will be asking everone to wash their hands before holding him too.

 

[highhopes19]

Im assuming you are talking about my thread lol lol..and I think its a lot more likely of them catching something from someone that is on top of them/holding them/ etc than just from passing someone out in the store..especially since you can get those carseat covers (which we are getting) to shield baby from unwanted touches and stuff in public..and since most strangers..or I would hope so..wont just come over and start touching your baby like family and friends will

haha yes your thread hun .

thats what i thought, its a bit different walking through a store than being passed round to loads of people

xxx

 

[JackiePed]

Nah, that's totally fine. Granted, it should be common sense for most people. I tend to err on the side of NOT being 'overprotective', and I still don't find that unreasonable. What I do find unreasonable is people saying they won't allow other kids around their baby, won't take their baby out in public for months, or don't want other people to hold the baby just in case... (obviously unless the baby has a compromised immune system, such as a preemie, etc...)
But simply asking people to be considerate and not knowing carry a bug to you and baby is completely reasonable.

 

[kaiser246]

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[highhopes19]

No your not! When my middle daughter was born and just barely a few weeks old which was in the winter, we had visitors always around. She became very sick because of this and we almost lost her. She got pnemonia, RSV, and bronchitis all the same time. She had to stay in the hospital for 7 days connected to oxygen. Her oxygen was deadly low. She made it through. You stand your ground no matter the crap that you receive.

awww gosh hun thats terrible must have been so scary
im glad she pulled through, makes me worry as i had avery low immune system when i was younger and was in hospital near enough every xmas and i dont want the same for her, i understand i cant wrap her up in cotton wool so to speak but i just dont wanna take the unnessicary risks just to please others .

i just feel a bit rude asking them to stay away . i know i shouldnt be worried of what they think of me but i dont want them to think im rude

xx

 

[kaiser246]

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[hellywelly]

Whenever I have had a bug or cold - and I am due to visit a friend with a bubba - I will always ring to let them down - the responsibility of the bubba works both ways visitor and parent xxx

 

[SuperKat]

I refuse to come any where near babies or pregnant people when I don't feel well, or if my kids have been feeling ill. I don't want to be THAT person that gets someone's baby sick. I expect the same of others....unfortunately, some people are seriously brainless and just don't think about it, or don't see it as a big deal.

I posted something about this very topic a few weeks back. I have been stressing over this very issue for a while because there are so many nieces and nephews in my family, and a few family members would think nothing of bringing their germs over. I've decided that I will tell the hospital staff that NO kids at all are allowed to visit- unless they are MY kids. And when it comes to being home, we will be refusing visitors for AT LEAST the first week, if not two. I don't need my newborn being held by a bunch of people- not during flu season! If they care about me and my child at all, they will not be selfish and will understand that I am doing it to protect her. Even if it seems over the top to them. I would respect anyone elses wishes for the same thing and wouldn't think poorly or ill of them at all for it, so if I can't get that in return then I just don't really care- they'll have to deal with it!

 

[Zou]

I plan on being the same. I've been so fed up while pregnant of people coming round and not telling me until they get here that they're ill and not just colds/flu either I mean proper infections that would need antibiotics if I caught and chicken pox that can be really serious in third trimester I'm not looking forward to telling people they can't come round if they're ill (especially my side of the family as I'm pretty sure a few of them would lie to me if they were). But baby is my number one priority not what they think of me.

 

[ChescaRose]

I think that's totally reasonable of you! I would expect people not to come and see baby if they are ill or have recently been.. its just common sense and good manners.. it's totally different to taking them out, as they are being passed around for cuddles (and probably kisses too ) xx

 

[SuperKat]

I'm pretty sure a few of them would lie to me if they were).

....I am afraid of this same exact thing. I believe my mother in law would do this, she is just one of those people that thinks things are stupid if the go against what she wants, she isn't able to understand why certain rules are in place/etc. If she doesn't like it, it's stupid to her and she will try to find a way around it. I don't think she gets sick often, but she always have my nieces, and it's hard to know with them when/if they are sick- she and one of my sisters are the biggest reason I am doing the no visitors for up to 2 weeks thing.

 

[Zou]

I'm pretty sure a few of them would lie to me if they were).

....I am afraid of this same exact thing. I believe my mother in law would do this, she is just one of those people that thinks things are stupid if the go against what she wants, she isn't able to understand why certain rules are in place/etc. If she doesn't like it, it's stupid to her and she will try to find a way around it. I don't think she gets sick often, but she always have my nieces, and it's hard to know with them when/if they are sick- she and one of my sisters are the biggest reason I am doing the no visitors for up to 2 weeks thing.

It's a horrible feeling isn't it? My mom's exactly the same. She's done a few things the last few months that show how little she cares about my opinions. If I set a 'rule' like no ill people around the baby and she thought it was ott I know she'd look for any opportunity to ignore it and try to 'show me who's boss'. I feel a bit helpless to be honest because no amount of being firm and not backing down will help if people are going to lie

 

[Nickij]

Definately for the first few of weeks I would not want anyone round if they were sick. But in reality unless you are going to keep LO in the house with no contact with the outside world he/she will pick things up. Obviously you don't want people to visit if they have a stomach bug/ flu etc. But if someone is in contact with some who has a cold etc, then I think thats going a bit to far.

Remember babies NEED to be exposed to germs in order for there immune systems to develop. I am not suggesting you deliberately exposed them to germs, but just not go to extreme methods to avoid all contact with possible germs. Also remember if you are breastfeeding this will go a long way to help LO fight off any germs they come into contact with.

 

[SuperKat]

I'm pretty sure a few of them would lie to me if they were).

....I am afraid of this same exact thing. I believe my mother in law would do this, she is just one of those people that thinks things are stupid if the go against what she wants, she isn't able to understand why certain rules are in place/etc. If she doesn't like it, it's stupid to her and she will try to find a way around it. I don't think she gets sick often, but she always have my nieces, and it's hard to know with them when/if they are sick- she and one of my sisters are the biggest reason I am doing the no visitors for up to 2 weeks thing.

It's a horrible feeling isn't it? My mom's exactly the same. She's done a few things the last few months that show how little she cares about my opinions. If I set a 'rule' like no ill people around the baby and she thought it was ott I know she'd look for any opportunity to ignore it and try to 'show me who's boss'. I feel a bit helpless to be honest because no amount of being firm and not backing down will help if people are going to lie

yes, it is very frustrating!!!! There was a outbreak of whooping cough here, and my nieces are all in the age range for it...so it scares me. I worry about rsv and all of that....this baby will have enough germs with just her siblings! lol I want to make sure I have given her a little time to build up her immune system before she is exposed to everyone elses germs!