Want To Cry For Maya

[Younglutonmum]

If you're not in the mood for a rant then look away now!!

Right I was adamant that my ex wouldn't be coming near Maya once she was born. The morning of her birth both me & my mum text him to let him know. Not because we felt he had a right to know but because we wanted him to know he had missed the most amazing moment. Well he didn't bother replying until I text him alot of abuse in the evening. He didn't ask any questions about the birth, about her or how she was doing.

But a few days ago I was looking at my lil Princess thinking that if he sees her just the once then surely that will hurt him more. Seeing her then walking away for good rather than not ever seeing her. So I text him & said ' would you like to visit Maya just the once ' He said he would love to so we arranged that he would meet me at her MW appoinment today.

Well last night i'm on MSN & Facebook Chat chatting away to various people when it emerges that my ex has been making out that he has visited Maya everyday since her birth. Also found out he's been accepting presents for her from people before I said he could see her which winds me up as Maya would never have recieved these gifts if I didn't allow this meeting. He's also apparantly been asking people to be godmother/godfather to Maya & referring to people I barely know as Mayas Aunty/Uncle. Hello?? He has nothing to do with Maya so why start making her an extended family. Perhaps i'm being silly but that would me up. So I text him last night telling him what i've heard & that he needs to stop pretending to be dad of the year because i'm not afraid to tell people how he's really behaved. He then replies telling me to ' f**k off, do you even want to see me tomorrow? ' I tell him I don't care if I see him or not but i'm doing this for Maya & thought he'd appreciate the chance to see her. He then texts me telling me he's not coming now. I figure he's just in a stupid strop so I leave it & think i'll text him in the morning.

So this morning I text him the following ' Stuart, just because we've had an argument, doesn't mean you need to let Maya down. This is your one chance to see her. I'm leaving my house in 10 minutes to go to the MW. I will wait outside the clinic for 15 minutes & if you don't show or I get no text then I know you don't want to see Maya ever '

I really thought he'd do right for once & show up. He didn't. Didn't even bother to text knowing me & Maya were waiting in the cold.

I'm so angry for giving him a chance. I'm so angry for my little girl. She's perfect & doesn't deserve a twat of a dad.

I wanted to tell you lot I was going to let him see her but didn't want you all thinking i'm an idiot especially as i've always said I wouldn't allow him near her.

Sorry for the long one

xXxXx

 

[Ema]

What an arse hole!! he really fucking is!! Not much more i can say but absolute fucking dick wit!! XxX

 

[lorrilou]

you did the right thing hun by giving him a chance, its his stupid fault that he fucked up and its his loss that he wont have anything to do with maya.

i never knew my real dad up until i was 16 and tbh never felt like i missed out.

you clearly give her enough love for the both of you and im sure she wont ever feel like she missed out.

 

[Lyrah]

Oh hun that's terrible!!!

What an idiot!!

That's not acceptable how he's treating both of you and you both deserve better. At the end of the day, it's his loss and he will come to realize it one day when it's too late.

Maya is a very lucky little girl to have such a loving mummy, you're doing great.

I can understand how frustrating and upsetting it must be for you but you can get through this Keep your chin up and stay strong.
You've done your part and shown him that you're the good person. Don't let him walk all over you and Maya like that. He needs to grow up and become a man. If he ever wants to see Maya, this is something he has to do first, because his immaturity and childish behaviour will not get him anywhere.

I'm so sorry you're having to go through all of this, it must be awful for you



xxx

 

[Younglutonmum]

The first moment I set on eyes on Maya one of my first thoughts was ' Stuart should see her ' I felt so much love for her & didn't want her to grow up & think I never gave him the chance to prove himself to us

He's just let me & her down so badly. I know i'll do just fine without him & she'll grow up being very much adored & loved but it's just awful to think anyone could turn there back on someone so beautiful & innocent. It makes me sick.

 

[Munchkin]

You absolutely did the right thing by Maya by giving him a chance, but I hope that was the last one.

Now, when people say to you that he is such a good Dad, I wouldn't hesitate to tell them what he is really like!

You should be be proud of yourself! Maya doesn't need him around. She has everything she needs right there - you!

https://gi56.photobucket.com/groups/g164/6J7WY4TKXH/hugs.jpg

 

[lorrilou]

just goes to show what a fuckin prick he is!!!

 

[welshcakes79]

what a waste of a wank he turned out to be..

so sorry he has let you both down, but more importantly he has let Maya down, his loss for never being able to hold your beautifull little girl...

he is an amoeba, not even worth the steam off your shite luv xxx

 

[charveyron]

Well done you! You gave him the chance - he blew it - at least now when Maya is older you can tell her the truth, you gave her dad the chance and it was him that didn't want to take it, you wasn't the one that stopped him seeing her. you and Maya will be fine, from the sounds of it you're better off without him!

 

[brownhairedmom]

Kelly,

Stuart and Adam need their heads knocked together.

What a f'ing prick. Like seriously, what a worthless piece of pathetic waste of space on this earth. He is the most inconsiderate ******* ever.

ARGGGGG I'm angry for you

 

[BurtonBaby]

He doesn't even deserve to lay eyes on your precious baby girl. And I would set everyone straight on what a piece of sh*t sperm donor he is.

 

[sam's mum]

What an absolute cock. At least now you know that you've been the bigger person in all this and given him that chance, and done the right thing for Maya - and he is the one missing out. She's better off without a 'dad' like him anyway...she's already got all the family she needs x

 

[leeanne]

I am sorry honey!

He's a waste of space on this earth!

 

[Lynxylaydee1]

are u sure he's not called david?? he must be a relative of my dad, they sound like twins!!!! u should be so so proud of urself for even considering letting her see ur gorgeous daughter, at least when she grows up and asks the typical questions about him she will know that u wernt bitter and stuff but you gave him way more chances than the fuckin c*** deserves, give me a blunt pair of scissors and i'll go make sure he cant ever have kids again he doesnt deserve a life let alone children!!!xxxx

 

[LucyS]

It shows his immaturity hun.

When me and Lee argue he says 'do it yourself then' and I happily will but I know there will be times when I just wish he'd see how much he could miss out on etc.

Maya has a fab mummy and that's all that matters to her!

 

[sammie18]

Oh wow i cant believe he told you he would show up!! what an asshole! I think you and maya are better off without him!! *hugs*

 

[Sarah88]

What a wanker! Glad she's got a great mum like you to be there for her in her life.
:Hug:

 

[Elli21]

you did the right thing by giving him a chance, but he just proved you right, hes a complete and utter idiot...!! Its his loss hun xx

 

[Suzanne]

Ok everyone please dont jump up and down on my head after reading this but I just wanted to come in at a different angle here

I dont know the background to any of this sweetheart and if I did maybe I would be joining in with all the other ladies in saying what a waste of space he really is BUT!

Having gone through something fairly similar with my ex I can put a different spin on things!

My ex got his ex gf (the gf before me) pregnant, I ended it last September and he immediatley went out and slept with her, he thought this would hurt me cos he knew how much I couldnt stand the woman, but to be honest by the time the relationship had ended she had done that much damage I couldnt give a shit if he moved in with her, married her or got her pregnant! Throughout her pregnancy he didnt wanna know her, told her that SHE had ruined his life (he seemed to forget it takes two) even up to the day she was born he didnt wanna know, I was the one that told him he had become a dad and he didnt bat an eyelid, didnt care.... or so it seemed!

Because 3 weeks after she was born, he saw a picture of her and his heart melted, he admitted that is was absolutley terrified of becoming a dad, didnt know in what direction to turn! But once he saw her picture he went straight round to see her and spent the weekend with her and his ex (they are not back together just friends)

So I suppose what im saying is, could he be scared? Does he think his life will be taken away from him if he admits he loves her? Is he scared of the responsibility? These are things that could be stopping him from crossing that threshold into your beautiful baby girls life!

If I was you... I would take some photo's and I would send them too him, write him a letter explaining how your feeling and what Maya is doing, sleep patterns etc tell him he is more than welcome to see her as long as you can come to an arrangement that is suitable for both of you but on your terms, photocopy it and then send it recorded delivery, keep the receipt and the letter together as proof in years to come when Maya asks about her dad you can say that you gave him every opportunity to be a part of her life, and he chose not to be a part of it, you have the proof, he cant deny it nver happened!

However this maybe the kick up the backside he needs, now like I said hun I dont know the background to your story and I might be speaking out of turn, but I would give him that one last chance and if he doesnt take it then you move on from him and make the best life possible for you and your precious daughter cos you and her are all that matter!

If he decided NOT to see her, then by all means take a full page spread out in your local paper telling everyone what a useless sperm donor he is! goodluck hun I hope everything works out for you and Maya!

 

[Younglutonmum]

Ok everyone please dont jump up and down on my head after reading this but I just wanted to come in at a different angle here

I dont know the background to any of this sweetheart and if I did maybe I would be joining in with all the other ladies in saying what a waste of space he really is BUT!

Having gone through something fairly similar with my ex I can put a different spin on things!

My ex got his ex gf (the gf before me) pregnant, I ended it last September and he immediatley went out and slept with her, he thought this would hurt me cos he knew how much I couldnt stand the woman, but to be honest by the time the relationship had ended she had done that much damage I couldnt give a shit if he moved in with her, married her or got her pregnant! Throughout her pregnancy he didnt wanna know her, told her that SHE had ruined his life (he seemed to forget it takes two) even up to the day she was born he didnt wanna know, I was the one that told him he had become a dad and he didnt bat an eyelid, didnt care.... or so it seemed!

Because 3 weeks after she was born, he saw a picture of her and his heart melted, he admitted that is was absolutley terrified of becoming a dad, didnt know in what direction to turn! But once he saw her picture he went straight round to see her and spent the weekend with her and his ex (they are not back together just friends)

So I suppose what im saying is, could he be scared? Does he think his life will be taken away from him if he admits he loves her? Is he scared of the responsibility? These are things that could be stopping him from crossing that threshold into your beautiful baby girls life!

If I was you... I would take some photo's and I would send them too him, write him a letter explaining how your feeling and what Maya is doing, sleep patterns etc tell him he is more than welcome to see her as long as you can come to an arrangement that is suitable for both of you but on your terms, photocopy it and then send it recorded delivery, keep the receipt and the letter together as proof in years to come when Maya asks about her dad you can say that you gave him every opportunity to be a part of her life, and he chose not to be a part of it, you have the proof, he cant deny it nver happened!

However this maybe the kick up the backside he needs, now like I said hun I dont know the background to your story and I might be speaking out of turn, but I would give him that one last chance and if he doesnt take it then you move on from him and make the best life possible for you and your precious daughter cos you and her are all that matter!

If he decided NOT to see her, then by all means take a full page spread out in your local paper telling everyone what a useless sperm donor he is! goodluck hun I hope everything works out for you and Maya!

Thank you for your messgae hun

I wish I could say he was scared but that's definitely not the case. He just isn't ready to be a dad yet. He's told me he'll be her dad in his own time!! Like I can be a mum in my own time??!! WTF!!

He's seen pictures of Maya & it doesn't bother him. I know for a fact he's got a pic of Maya on his phone & he's been showing it to people telling them he's visited us everyday since her birth. I wrote him a letter a while back telling him he can be involved & he never got back to me. I've sent him endless texts & emails aswell. During my pregnancy he went as far as to tell people he bought me a cot & pram as a surprise for me & had them sent to my house. Yet more lies. If he wanted to see her he would have done so by now, i've given him pleanty of opurtunities

This is also the same bloke who wished her dead when I was 14 weeks pregnant. No way do I want him near her.

I can see where you're coming from but this certainly isn't my ex. He isn't scared just isn't bothered i'm afraid