Well, we met up.........

[Younglutonmum]

Well girlies today I agreed to meet with LOs dad. I said i'd here him out despite all the shit he has given me

It was a waste of time. He spent the first hour filling me in on what ive been missing out on in the clubbing world. Like I give a s**t!!! I do not care how many sambuccas he managed to down nor do I care that his mate fell down the steps at some club.

Then when we talked about the baby he immediately got in a strop when I was explaining how he has made me feel. I said I wasn't trying to guilt trip him or anything but I just needed him to understand. Then he got in a mood because I kept referring to LO as 'my' daughter' He was like I think you'll find she's 'our daughter' Well biologically maybe but not emotionally.

He was just so immature & I don't want this in my life. I felt physically sick sitting opposite him.

He even turned round & said it was my birthday on Thursday in case you've forgotton. I thought you would have at least text!!! Nope I didn't forget just chose not to acknowledge it.

He was saying that he wants us to meet up on a regular basis now but I really don't want to girls. I don't want him near me, I really don't.

Oh & he gave me £100 as his contribution towards baby stuff but i'm not to ask for anything more as he's going away soon & he needs money for that. He said he'll try & give me money in January. I don't want his poxy money!!! Grrrrrr

xxxx

 

[nikky0907]

A whole 100 till January! Boy,isn't he just a saint!

He is way too immature...and so self-centred! I get the impression that he thinks it's all about him.

I'm so sorry it didn't go well and you felt like that.

You do what you feel it's best for you two girls.If you felt physically sick sitting there with him then maybe a better decision would be that you don't meet up with him.
I frankly don't believe that he is ready or responsible to be a father to YOUR little girl...

Hopefully,maybe,one day he will realize the mistakes he has made,when he grows out this phase of his life.
No matter what little Anais won't miss out on any love thats for sure...
xxx

 

[cuddles314]

So sorry that it didn't go well hun. It's clear from the way he made you feel that you're on a completely different level to him. You've realised the responsibilities you face being a parent, and he so obviously hasn't, or is in denial, that it's no wonder you feel so pissed off with him. You alone have to make the decision that will be best in the long run for both you and your little girl, and I believe that if you look to your heart you will find it.
Oh and isn't he generous giving you a whole £100 - TILL JANUARY!!!!!! Maybe if he cut down on the amount of times he went out and got wasted on sambuca, then he could give you some regular financial support.
You're being really strong hun, and should be proud of yourself for coping the way you are. Stay positive sweetie. Sending you big hugs and lots of positive vibes.
xxx

 

[brownhairedmom]

What a pig.


Don't see him. And drag his ass to court for child support.

 

[Younglutonmum]

Thxs Girlies!! Seeing ur messages has made me smile

He is such a waster. I just pityed him 2day. He looked so so pathetic. I was cringing, thinking omg I actually slept with u. Gross!!!

Ive used some of that £100 to buy myself a big fat pizza aswell My daughter has pleanty of things already so thought i'd treat myself for once :0

xxx

 

[Ema]

£100 quid......what that ment to get you. Hardly buys anything. Prob the fare home and supper. XxxX

 

[Younglutonmum]

It's a joke isn't it!! Especially now i've bought everything!! There seriously isn't a thing my baby needs now. Where was this £100 a few months back when I was really struggling??

 

[demonmadcat]

i can hear the csa beckoning. i say treat yourself with the money, you deserve it.. you've scrimped and saved to get everything for your daughter. use it to make you feel good. and buying a pizza means that anais got some anyway, so you did spend some on her. lol.

hugs..

Em

 

[Younglutonmum]

Lol I love ur thinking Em!!

He's calling me in a few days to arrange another meeting but I so don't want to go. I really don't know how to tell him without him going totally mad at me!!

 

[brownhairedmom]

I don't see why you need to meet up with him. The baby isn't born yet. When she's born if he wants to meet up to see her, that's one thing. But what is the purpose of meeting up again before? So he can just piss you off more?

 

[Younglutonmum]

I know. I said to him why do we need to keep meeting up? He didn't have an answer to that.

Thing is I thought i'd be nice & ask him along to my next MW appt but he said no. I mean wtf??!! Surely meeting up once a week in some grotty pub feeling uncomfortable around each other is worse than going to a MW appt with me?? Least at the MW I don't need to talk to him lol!!

To be honest even when LO is here I don't want us to meet up & I certainly don't want him near bubs. The thought of him holding my angel makes me sick

 

[maybebaby]

What an idiot!! You are so better off without him!!

 

[SpecialGift89]

Is he nuts a £100 until January!....... does he have any idea how much a pack of nappies cost!? I mean seriously that's only one thing you need what about wipes and everything else once your daughters born. I think you should take him into mothercare or something at your next meeting and show him how much things cost for a baby nowadays!

 

[Younglutonmum]

Lol he really has no idea what so ever!!

God £100 doesn't even cover my moses basket, stand & bedding!!! What a fool!

He said today that he wants to try & come to my next MW appt. I'm really hoping he can't make it though. Just don't want him there. I love going to the MW & hearing how my LO is doing. I don't want it to be tainted by him being there

 

[nikky0907]

I agree....He should earn going to the MW with you! It's a privilage,not a right!

 

[maybebaby]

Just reschedule the appointment and "forget" to tell him

 

[Munchkin]

Hi hun,
What a wa**er!
If I were you, I really would lay down the rules. If he wants to be a consistent parent then it's fine and he can see her regularly. But baby definitely doesn't need a daddy who comes when it pleases him and pisses off when he wants to. She needs consistency and unless he shows that he can be a permanent feature and a good role model, I wouldn't want him near bubs.

The last thing you want to be explaining to baby is where daddy is when he doesn't come to see her.

 

[Younglutonmum]

The thought of having him in her life is really starting to make me sick. I've come so far on my own, totally regaining my confidence along the way & now at the very last minute he starts to show a little interest

I told him straight I don't trust him at all. He's messed me around so much & i'm not prepared to let him mess Anais around.

I know there will be women on here who think I should give him a chance but those who have followed my many many issues with him on here will hopefully understand why I don't want him involved at all. I've honestly given him & his family too many chances.

If he had started to show a little interest a few months back then i'd be more willing to let him into her life but I just feel too much has happened & been said. He's let me do all the hard work, emotionally & financially. It just feels like he's turned up to claim his 'prize' if that makes sense??

 

[brownhairedmom]

Sometimes its just better to bring your baby up in a stable single parent family than having the rogue parent coming and going when he/she pleases.

Sometimes its better to not have both parents involved, no matter what that parent "deserves". Just because you slept with someone doesn't make you a parent. It just makes you someone who had an accident while getting it on until you prove otherwise.

 

[Younglutonmum]

Those are my thoughts aswell Rae!!

So many people are giving me the whole 'your baby deserves 2 parents' line

It's making me feel so god damned guility. But I know she's not missing out on anything just having me around. I honestly & truely believe that. I just wish other people could understand!!