what is the point of a christening if you're not religious?

[private26]

Genuine question. I was thinking of getting my girls christened after grandparents asking about it but then I thought if neither dh or I are religious then what really is the point? I would feel a bit of a fraud I suppose if we don't believe in god but I know plenty of people get excited about having their children christened and they're not religious so just wondering if I have missed something x

 

[MrsButterfly]

No you haven't missed anything. IMO you should only have a christening if you're religious. I really don't get the point otherwise - there are secular naming ceremonies if you want a celebration but aren't religious x

 

[Scottish mum]

My lo is getting christend my oh and his family are religious and my mil and fil are both elders at there church. My family are not. I agreed to a christening because I thought it would be nice for my oh.

I have to add that we were both christened so feel it would be right, but we don't go to church suppose that kinda makes a fraud : /

Who can turn down cake and a buffet lol

 

[Rah]

We never got dd1 christened for this reason there are naming ceremonies that the registry office do or just hire some where and have a 'wetting the babies head' day

 

[girl friday]

I *guess* for some people the traditional element plays a part. Just like some people will still have a church wedding, some people like to have LO christened even if they don't attend church.

 

[missk1989]

Yeah I agree that standing it church and promising to raise them with god in mind or whatever it is you swear doesn't sit right with me. I would be lying in a place that means something to a lot of people and I would feel uncomfortable. But like another poster said its traditional.

 

[Pixie19]

I wasn't christened and im glad I wasn't as im not religious and would have hated being forced into a religion/having a religion chosen for me.
I will let my son choose when he's older.

Just to add - I don't think it's wrong to christen your child, especially if you are religious yourself.
My sister is having her daughter christened and she's not religious at all! I don't see the point but it's her baby

 

[WelshOneEmma]

I was never christened, yet my mum wants us to get my DD christened. I am the same as you though-neither of us is religious. Yet I find I want to, to get everyone together to celebrate. A naming ceremony feels a bit cheesy you know?

 

[private26]

Thanks for the replies ladies, glad i'm not the only one that's been thinking this. Is it true that you can'y get buried at a church if you're not christened? I'm sure I read ages ago that you can't get married at a church if you're not christened but I think this is now not true? x

 

[Scottish mum]

No you can marry in church but its respectful if you attend a few times before hand x

 

[Louise88]

I got my dd christened because it meant a lot for both sides of our family, were both christened but not religious but I know it was nice to do for the other family members who are.

Someone told me you can get married in a church or be a godparent if your not christened so I suppose it gives them those options in the future if they are.

 

[cmarie33]

I was christened as a baby but am now not religious whatsoever. Neither oh or I are religious and won't be getting lo christened. She can make her own mind up about religion when she's older. With regards to who can resist a buffet- I'm with you on that! Hehe! They do do 'naming ceremonies' these days which I think are not a religious thing? Don't feel a fraud though, if you feel it'd be nice for your lo go for it! x

 

[dgirllamius]

We didn't do it for the simple fact that we aren't religious.

I find probably a lot of people who aren't religious probably do it to get family together and have a party

 

[Larkspur]

Don't know about marriage or funerals but I do know that a lot of private schools with a religious background won't accept unchristened children, so that's the reason most of my secular friends have done it, 'just in case' they want to send their kids to one. I don't want my child to go to a school with any religious attachment, so it's not an issue for me.

 

[stockers697]

Yes I agree. A christening is when someone is committing them self to the church family and that they will follow god, godparents are people who are going to support the child to follow the bible. This doesn't really sit comfortably with me as we are not regular church goers and like other posters have said I would like LO to make her own choices when she is older.

We are having a service of thanksgiving in the church we got married in by the vicar who married us which is a private service just for us for mine and OH's beliefs where we thank god for the gift he has given us and she will have supporting friends who will just support her and be there for her. This feels much better for us.

You do have naming ceremonies also which are none religious x

 

[Irish Eyes]

I don't think its right to stand in church & say you're going to raise your lo as a Christian if you're not going to. I think its awful that some people do it just for school reasons!

My husband hasn't been christened but we were allowed to get married in a c of e church. To be a godparent you should be christened & confirmed but I guess that's unusual now so our godparents for our lo were just christened

 

[Twister]

We aren't getting lo christened as we're not religious so it just seems completely pointless and a waste of money for us. I was christened but my family isn't religious. My friends got their lo christened but they're not religious either, it does make me think 'what is the point' but its their kid and their choice so what ever.

My mum was shocked when I said we weren't getting her christened and basically implied its something you have to do other wise you can't get married and stuff I told her that was a load of rubbish lol, there are millions of people who don't get christened and manage to get married just fine.

 

[AngelofTroy]

Touchy subject in our family, OH's mum is very religious and will worry about LO not being christened. Now normally I wouldn't have considered christening him, as I was in the camp of "it's hypocritical and wrong to say those things if you don't mean them", however seeing how upset and anxious MIL-to-be is about her own MIL dying (because she wasn't religious and asked for a humanist funeral ceremony she's now convinced she's in hell) I think we might do it just for her sanity!!

 

[admiral765]

My family are not religious and neither are my OH's except his parents are Jehovah Witnesses, DH doesn't believe in it at all. Both our lo's are not christened. I think it's such a big decision to make and one that they can decide when they are older.
My sister had her LO christened and I was supposed to be his godparent until she decided to have my other sister instead. I'm glad I wasn't in the end when I heard the words spoken. My sister isn't religious, her OH is catholic but you wouldn't know it but they wanted to get their LO into the catholic school coz its the best one around apparently, don't agree with it but would never say anything. Their lives.
My family have never questioned if we were christening our LO's xx

 

[MrsBroodyPant]

I think getting your baby christened is like introducing them to religion and saying they can be part of the church if they choose to be. Just as u take your child swimming to teach them to swim or to ballet/football lessons they may become a dancer or footballer. Being christened is giving opportunity. Your child might want to become a vicar or preist. I know this is a different way of looking at it
Xxx