What will midwife do...?

[Kittique]

Bit nervous to write this but I am feeling very depressed in recent weeks. I have a longstanding history of depression and anxiety but over the last few years I have managed this really well with counselling and regular exercise without medication. Since being pregnant I can't exercise and feel a bit overwhelmed.I think it is getting on top of me again. I also have a very profound family history of depression/bi polar (my father committed suicide) and my mother has always been on anti depressants since I was born (also attempted suicide)... I'm actually frightened i'm going to get crippling PND or even worse... psychosis.

If I tell my midwife how I'm feeling...not to mention my horrible family history...what is she going to do?

 

[ay2808]

Sorry to hear this. I think the most important thing is that you recognise it (which you have) and seek some support. I don't know exactly what they would do but I inagine some sort of counselling and perhaps extra visits from the midwife. Please tell her as they WILL be able to help you. Did they ask about family history at your booking appointment? X

 

[Rainbow82]

I'm sorry you're feeling like this, I haven't been through it but I should think that your midwife will make sure that she puts support in place for you now and after the birth. I imagine after the birth she will offer extra visits and make sure the health visitor does the same to help spit any signs of ppd. If things do get really bad I think there may be an option of a mother and baby unit so your mental health can be monitored more closely. A friend of someone I know stayed at a mother and baby unit and I believe it was a positive experience for her.

 

[Kittique]

Sorry to hear this. I think the most important thing is that you recognise it (which you have) and seek some support. I don't know exactly what they would do but I inagine some sort of counselling and perhaps extra visits from the midwife. Please tell her as they WILL be able to help you. Did they ask about family history at your booking appointment? X

I did actually and I ticked the boxes where it asks about family history of mental health. The midwife quickly dismissed it and asked me if I felt anxious. When I said yes she simply said 'well pregnancy is a stressful experience!' and that was that. No-ones ever mentioned it again.

I'm afraid as I read they can split you from the baby until you recover. I don't think I need that, but I have no idea how I'm going to react after giving birth it's so frightening to read about people who have had psychosis and don't know what's going on anymore How will I know if it's happening!

 

[Kittique]

I will mention to her...can I decline if they want to get someone else involved? I suppose they can't force me to do anything if I don't want to.... I hope...

 

[BabyCleo]

Hey! I just wanted to give you my story..

Ive had really bad depression and panic attacks/PTSD/generalized anxiety. When I first met my doctor I also ticked off the boxes etc and my mum has bad depression too. I had gotten it all under control but it came back with pregnancy. After a few months it got bad, so I told my doc I just needed some help. They tried anti depressants but they didn't work, so they set me up with a therapist who deals directly through my hospital with pregnant women/pregnancy losses etc. Shes been awesome!! They have also made notes and are on a severe PND watch when the time comes, as I think it will be unavoidable. Im not worried about it, they never told me I would be an unfit mum or take away my baby. They are there to protect and help me through everything to make sure that dosent happen.

They have stuff ready for me when PND time comes. If it comes on bad, then I have the help ready, if it dosent, then that's just great

I would chat to your midwife about it. Its very very important to be open about this stuff with her. I was afraid to at first, but I am so glad I did.

 

[BabyCleo]

Oh! I also read a story (I wouldn't be able to find it now) about a woman who at 29 weeks pregnant tried to kill herself with an overdose of meds. Her husband found her unconscious on the floor. She was depressed but no one listened to her. She was rushed to hospital and she and baby were fine, and they decided to get her help and put her in a ward for a bit. They then had people on standby (like me) when the PND hit. No one took her baby away, or forced her to do anything she didn't want too. She now has 2 happy babies at home!

No one will take your baby away

 

[JumpingIn]

I had the same fears but have recently confided in the midwife and, honestly, she couldn't have been more matter-of-fact about it. They see this stuff all the time, it's just more boxes to tick and more appointments to make for them, there'll be no judgement and they certainly wont take your baby! It's all about getting you the resources you need and putting them in place now. Preventing PND is much more convenient than treating it, so they're very eager to help.

What will happen is you will be referred to a midwife specialising in mental health who will have you on her radar after the birth to make sure you have all the support you need. You'll meet her to talk through what's going on and she can direct you to sources of help. That's it.

Honestly, getting them to take it seriously is the biggest challenge and once they do, it can only be positive for your family. Your mental health is so important.

Taking a baby would only ever be in question if you had harmed little one after the birth or became psychotic or something, and even then it's a very lengthy and difficult process and something they ALWAYS want to avoid where possible. A baby needs its mum and no-one knows that more than midwives and related professionals.

Helping you out is their job. They do it for mummies and babies, to keep families strong and healthy

 

[Kittique]

Thank you everyone I will definitely talk to her, appointment tomorrow.