What would you do?

[Cazamatazaaa]

My ex left me, he got a new girlfriend straight away, im nearly 24 and she is very young, 18/19. well we have sorted everything out, i get on with him, everything is okay. BUT one thing...

He comes to pick up our little boy, and he brings his girlfriend, but its not like she stays in the car, she comes out, to my front door, tries talking to me, she hasnt got kids, but shes got constant little digs at my parenting, things like "my best friends 8 month old doesnt have a bottle anymore, we were so proud we cried" ermmm hello shut up. I can tell its aimed at me, my little boy is 16 months and he still has milk in his bottle! and the other week they both took him into town, and i got "oh we let Ollie walk all day around town, when we got home you could tell he had walked cos he was walking so well on his own" ERMMMM are you trying to say i dont let walk, I have 2 children, im a single parent, its impossible to let him walk while im out as i cant push a pram, and hold 2 childrens hands!

Its constant, digs like this ALL the time, i hate her!

 

[Dezireey]

Best way to deal with people like her is jokey and quickly answer back with something that she doesn't expect such as ' wow you're a bit of a rude un kid, your mummy not taught you any manners yet when visiting peoples houses?' She's talking like an ignorant and arrogant child, therefore treat her like one. She will continue with these off hand remarks if you let her get away with it. She will say something way out of line one day and you'll probably blow a gasket because you haven't answered back before. Muster up your confidence and deal with her now if I were you. She's a stupid little upstart who needs to be put in her place. Anyone, whatever age that has the audacity to comment on my parenting skills ESPECIALLY when they have no children of their own will feel the sharp end of my tongue. At my age now (38) I don't take crap from anyones words anymore and always answer back, catches most amidst people by surprise as they are used to people ignoring them or letting them say it. Get on in there girly and show her what's for! lol xx hugs x

 

[Cazamatazaaa]

Thank you for your reply! its what i needed to hear! I have no confidence when it comes to things like this, she has no idea, and i normally just smile and say "awww" lol! but im sick of it, its affecting me daily, i hate her, I am definately just going to take your advice though hunny! cos its true! she is extremely arrogant! and thats something I CANT STAND grrrrr! thank you xxxxxx

 

[jackie2012]

And if that doesn't put her in her place i would tell your ex that you don't appreciate it and to not bring her along to pick your child anymore. There's no reason you should have to put up with his girlfriends crap. I'm with the previous post i wouldn't be able to bite my tongue. especially with someone how doesn't have kids of their own.

 

[Cazamatazaaa]

Thanks hun, ive text my little ones dad and shes now to stay in the car whenever he collects our son. ive said i dont want her coming anymore. its getting me down so its for the best

 

[teal]

Definitely for the best. You don't need any extra stress! xx

 

[lovingmommy]

Ooooh. I would have flipped shit! There's no way I would let my exes girl question my parenting. Girl, how did you keep quiet?! You must have some patience! Seriously, I also think it's best for her to stay in the car. I would be furious about that in the first place. If by chance she somehow continues to make remarks that make you mad or uncomfortable I would definitely say something back. Hope everything goes well. I'm dreading the day that I have to deal with something like this. Stay strong, hun!

 

[Cazamatazaaa]

thanks hunny! shes now banned from coming to my door! it sounds pathetic but shes soo childish and i havent got the time of day for it! xxxxxxx

 

[MommaAlexis]

As a step mum, I never said anything like that to her mum. No matter how much I disapproved of her choices, I'd only moan to OH about it. I did go with him to pick her up, he can't carry everything himself and we didn't have a car so between playpen diaper bag and wriggling toddler he needed help. But I also very rarely talked while there unless it was to update her. (ex wouldn't update her about milestones, so I told her the first time she said no, talked or learned any cool 'tricks'). But sly jabs at parenting? Nope. Needless drama, if me and her were gonna be around each other for a while we have to be civil is my opinion. Funny enough, me and OH have since broken up and am carrying his kid, and I stay over at her house like once a month now lol. Being civil worked for me, wish all potential step mums got that memo. Hopefully she can learn to bite her tongue!

 

[AnnabelsMummy]

Oh goodness me! This girl sounds annoying!! She might just be jelous - i know it sounds weird, because you're an ex and she's a present girlfriend, but maybe she slightly sees you as a threat, so to make digs and belittles you and your peranting technique and making out that she's better makes her feel better?! (very childish though! - but then again at 18/19 most people without kiddies are!)

To be honest i don't see any reason why she even NEEDS to be around the child, unless she's a really long-term girlfriend, but if that was me, i'd want the mother to feel comfortable leaving their child with me, and that i too would try and stick to a similar routine to her, surely that's be better than her saying she doens't agree with your way of doing things..

sounds like you're doing great, i think having 2 young children is more than double the work of one, it's almost non-stop.. she hasn't got any children, so i really wouldn't pay any notice to any of the clap-trap she spouts out!

 

[Cazamatazaaa]

Thanks so much!
MommaAlexis, its nice to hear from a different side, but know its still wrong.

Annabels mummy, thats really made me feel better. theyve been together for 7 months now so it must be serious, i dont know though, shes really childish and i really havent got the time for that lol!