hope2bmother
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On Dec. 13, 2014 I had a miscarriage at 9w2d. Ultrasound and blood work confirmed a complete natural miscarriage. I go tomorrow for a finally blood test to confirm that my hCG is <5 MIU/ML. The last reading about 2.5 weeks ago was approximately 152 MIU/ML but ALL of my pregnancy symptoms had disappeared completely and I stopped bleeding approximately 7 days post-miscarriage. All pregnancy tests were definitely negative (aka STARK WHITE where the line or the '+' once were 
)
I was told to wait one cycle before TTC and though me and my husband abstained from intercourse for the two weeks post-MC as instructed, as soon as the bleeding stopped and the two weeks were up, we resumed making love with no form of birth control whatsoever Although I am still extremely sad about the loss, I feel that I have reached a good place in terms of mentality. I have a big science background (I'm a Physician Assistant) and so I have been able to comfort myself with the fact that my Little Bean, if s/he had survived, would've suffered greatly in this life and if my baby had to succumb to a genetic disorder, in utero at a very young age, barely a fetus was the ideal time for this to happen, though it is an absolute tragedy regardless of when it happens! We are mothers, after all, even if we never got to hold our babies! ANYWAY, I digress
Some days ago (maybe 5?), my breasts started to hurt LIKE NO OTHER! They feel like they did when I was pregnant, only worse. I am also getting nauseated when I take my prenatal on an empty stomach, which only happened when I was pregnant (it's food based and is normally very gentle on my stomach). I actually vomited 2 x the other day after taking it. After the bleeding stopped, a few days later I had (TMI warning) copious EWCM for several days. It looked just like my CM around ovulation. However, my OPKs were technically negative (there was a strong line, but it was not as dark as the control line). Pregnancy tests were negative (as I mentioned before). I am waking up nauseated b/c I am so hungry and I am having mild cravings (think along the lines of "I'd give anything for a big, fat, sourdough pretzel", but if I can't have it, then I'm okay eating something else). I'm also getting occasional cramping, like after exercise. I had 2 dreams I was pregnant as well. Then, about 3 days ago I had rust-colored EWCM. Implantation bleeding? Ovulation-related? However, pregnancy tests were, and remain, negative. OPKs were negative, as previously mentioned.
A bit more info. I turned 34 on 12/16/14 and my husband will be 41 on 2/21/15. We were lucky and conceived on our first try! I had a dream on the night of 11/1/14 that I was pregnant and took a test the next morning and lo and behold, it was POSITIVE! My cycles were btw 29 - 33 days prior to the MC.
Honestly, I am not on here to get your opinion on whether or not you think I might be pregnant again, as I know strange things can and do happen to women's bodies after a MC. I never had any symptoms of ovulation or impending menses other than what I could tell by my CM and my odd cravings (think sipping Gatorade through a Twizzler straw when I'm normally an organic, whole foods vegan type). I realize that what I'm experiencing could just be related to my body getting back on track, but it's driving me BONKERS to be so out of touch with my body (I'm normally VERY in tune with it, as you may have gathered from the whole dream thing). What I am looking for is the experiences of those who have been where I am, whether you wound up pregnant immediately following a MC (never had AF return in between) or whether you had new and different symptoms of AF following an MC. I continue to have CM, though it's no longer like egg whites. But really no sign of AF the way I'm used to, though maybe everything will be different now! I know that pregnancy is a huge stress on the body!
Sorry for this rambling post. Thank you for reading, if you made it this far. I look forward to hearing all of your experiences. And just FYI, I am actually hoping to NOT be pregnant as I am waiting to hear back from an awesome job and I'd hate to start it being 1 month pregnant already. But OBVIOUSLY we are EAGER to conceive and birth and raise our rainbow baby! I've wanted to be a mother for as long as I can remember!
A happy and healthy 2015 to all of you! Infinite baby dust to each and every one of you!
)I was told to wait one cycle before TTC and though me and my husband abstained from intercourse for the two weeks post-MC as instructed, as soon as the bleeding stopped and the two weeks were up, we resumed making love with no form of birth control whatsoever Although I am still extremely sad about the loss, I feel that I have reached a good place in terms of mentality. I have a big science background (I'm a Physician Assistant) and so I have been able to comfort myself with the fact that my Little Bean, if s/he had survived, would've suffered greatly in this life and if my baby had to succumb to a genetic disorder, in utero at a very young age, barely a fetus was the ideal time for this to happen, though it is an absolute tragedy regardless of when it happens! We are mothers, after all, even if we never got to hold our babies! ANYWAY, I digress
Some days ago (maybe 5?), my breasts started to hurt LIKE NO OTHER! They feel like they did when I was pregnant, only worse. I am also getting nauseated when I take my prenatal on an empty stomach, which only happened when I was pregnant (it's food based and is normally very gentle on my stomach). I actually vomited 2 x the other day after taking it. After the bleeding stopped, a few days later I had (TMI warning) copious EWCM for several days. It looked just like my CM around ovulation. However, my OPKs were technically negative (there was a strong line, but it was not as dark as the control line). Pregnancy tests were negative (as I mentioned before). I am waking up nauseated b/c I am so hungry and I am having mild cravings (think along the lines of "I'd give anything for a big, fat, sourdough pretzel", but if I can't have it, then I'm okay eating something else). I'm also getting occasional cramping, like after exercise. I had 2 dreams I was pregnant as well. Then, about 3 days ago I had rust-colored EWCM. Implantation bleeding? Ovulation-related? However, pregnancy tests were, and remain, negative. OPKs were negative, as previously mentioned.
A bit more info. I turned 34 on 12/16/14 and my husband will be 41 on 2/21/15. We were lucky and conceived on our first try! I had a dream on the night of 11/1/14 that I was pregnant and took a test the next morning and lo and behold, it was POSITIVE! My cycles were btw 29 - 33 days prior to the MC.
Honestly, I am not on here to get your opinion on whether or not you think I might be pregnant again, as I know strange things can and do happen to women's bodies after a MC. I never had any symptoms of ovulation or impending menses other than what I could tell by my CM and my odd cravings (think sipping Gatorade through a Twizzler straw when I'm normally an organic, whole foods vegan type). I realize that what I'm experiencing could just be related to my body getting back on track, but it's driving me BONKERS to be so out of touch with my body (I'm normally VERY in tune with it, as you may have gathered from the whole dream thing). What I am looking for is the experiences of those who have been where I am, whether you wound up pregnant immediately following a MC (never had AF return in between) or whether you had new and different symptoms of AF following an MC. I continue to have CM, though it's no longer like egg whites. But really no sign of AF the way I'm used to, though maybe everything will be different now! I know that pregnancy is a huge stress on the body!
Sorry for this rambling post. Thank you for reading, if you made it this far. I look forward to hearing all of your experiences. And just FYI, I am actually hoping to NOT be pregnant as I am waiting to hear back from an awesome job and I'd hate to start it being 1 month pregnant already. But OBVIOUSLY we are EAGER to conceive and birth and raise our rainbow baby! I've wanted to be a mother for as long as I can remember!
A happy and healthy 2015 to all of you! Infinite baby dust to each and every one of you!
Good luck!
