When/how should you start?

[tinytabby]

I'm only just pregnant, and I am still in the cautious stages, but I am pretty sure that I don't want too many medical interventions and I'm open to the idea of a home birth.

I hate hospitals and I have heard too many horror stories about infections, not being able to have visitors or OH with you, neglect and bossing about. I'd like to bring my child into the world in a relaxed, safe environment, do things in my time, and have my mother as well as my OH around to help me.

When did you start thinking about this? Am I jumping the gun here?

How did you approach it with your OH (I am a bit afraid of raising the issue with him in case he just says no outright.)

Are there any good books/sites with all the facts on them I could have a look at?

 

[NuKe]

Hi hun! I don't think you can start too early! I had decided before I even got pregnant that I was having a homebirth this time round. Not due to a horrible experience in the hospital last time, the birth was awesome, but I hated staying there overnight etc without my DH and discharged myself pretty much as soon as he got there the next day. I think start jotting down things you'd like to happen, people you want there, if you want aromatherapy, hypnotherapy or whatever, what kind of pain relief you're open to.

I am determined to have my home birth, but not at any cost. My MW says that even if I have a temp I shoudl go to hospital and I will, she's done lots of homebirths herself. Talk to your GP and your community mws about it good luck!

 

[tinytabby]

Wow, thanks for your reply. It sounds good that you can be flexible and have a 'back up plan' that involves going to hospital.

I'm going to the GP in the morning to tell her I am up the duff and get put into the system so I will ask her about it then.

 

[NuKe]

I was expecting a metaphorical brick wall from my GP, but tbh she was very open about it! I had a good long chat with my community mw too and was suprised to hear she'd done 2 only last year (they are pretty much unheard of in Northern Ireland!). We talked about my first labour and the fact that there was meconium (baby poop) in my waters when they broke which can signal distress and if something like that happened i would need to go to hospital, and I'm definitely open to it but I will not be having another epidural! First one didn't work for me and I got more panicked about it not working than I would have if I hadn't got it at all! Def mention it to the hospital when you go for your first scan too. And congrats!

 

[Jims_Girl]

Congratulations!
I was around 16 weeks when I first mentioned it to me husband.... Once I explained my rationale he was completely behind me - now he seems more adamant to stay at home than me
I was never going to birth in a labour ward as I hate hospitals but was initially booked into a birthing centre.
I think my husband was completely for a home birth once he heard my lovely midwifes views....

 

[JellyBeann]

My husband is all for a HB too! More so that he doesn't have to go home that night and can stay with us! I hated that the most...If I wasn't so tired, I'd have checked myself out and gone home I think!! They woke me up to wake DH up to tell him to go away basically!!

 

[bettny]

i told my midwife at booking appointment at 11weeks she said where would u like to have ur baby i said home lol
as for my OH he doesnt like the idea as his side of the family have scared him about how i am putting the baby in danger (which is a load of poop) BUT luckily for me he has no choice in the matter hes in Serbia im in the UK and having lo here in the house i grew up in (aka my mums and she is fully behind me!)
think even if he did get his visa accepted and could be here he would just do wat i wanted anyway but his family have made it quite clear that they do not approve

 

[tinytabby]

Thanks everyone!

I'm going to do some reading up between now and my first midwife visit. I went to the GP today for the first time and she was totally unhelpful but said she would put it in my notes that I was interested in HB. I'm going to see the midwife for the first time at 12-13 weeks so I have a bit of time.

I also mentioned it to my OH last night and he said he didn't know anything and didn't have an opinion but wouldn't rule anything out. So that's all good!