When is the right time?

[Jetset]

We have a beautiful 4 year old daughter who has just started school and we always said that we would like another at this point. Now the time has arrived there just seems so many complications, the main one being I have a very active job as I am a dressage rider with my own yard of horses to compete and train as well as clients horses that I compete.

If I have time off I simply don't get paid and while most clients horses are well behaved, I have some pretty unpredictable youngsters just coming up through the levels.

Is there ever a right time???

 

[angelbump]

Hiya jetset, I really don't think there's ever a right time. There will be times where it's more practical to try and fall pregnant but never a perfect time. Something will always crop up. Is there anyway round you working with the younger horses? Another staff member on hand to help? Maybe you could save up for a few months before trying and while pregnant to make up for loss of earnings while off with baby? Hope that it works itself out in the end x

 

[Jetset]

I have been trying to find other options, like sending my young stallion to my trainers but it is so hard trying to fit everything in that I couldn't have a full 9 months off, so would have to continue until nearer the due date.

I really do want another and I rode 4 horses all the way through my previous pregnancy (they were all my own though) but now riding up to 8 a day is not quite as easy.

 

[Talia12]

There's never a right time. Also, consider that SOOO many kids out there were unplanned, and it all worked out fine - if you weren't TTC and just happened to fall preg right now, you'd be happy, right? You wouldn't think "is it the right time", because it'd be too late for that (haha) you'd just get on with it and it'd be amazing
I'm not saying don't try to plan, obviously. Some times DEFO aren't the right time (eg having a baby, especially a sibling, right around the time of some huge life event) but on the flip side there's never a perfect time. When things aren't totally perfect, smooth and stable, it doesn't seem right. When things are (when are they?!) you wouldn't want to rock the boat.
So just think, how would you feel right now if you got a sudden BFP? If the answer is that you'd sit on the toilet and smile, do it. Now is the right(ish) time. If the answer is totally panicked, sick and regretful, then no. But I don't think that's the case or you wouldn't be here
FWIW, when I got pg with my son, after giving up on TTC for a while and embarking on other life adventures, it was totally unexpected and on paper was NOT a good time (I was at uni...) but it turned out perfect. Babies do

 

[Needabun]

OMG!!!! Such good advice from you guys. YES, I love it!!!

 

[lilmisscaviar]

I'm not sure what to say as far as your job. You said you rode throughout your previous pregnancy but now you have some clients horses that are unpredictable so I would say the only way to be 100% sure that you won't get hurt is to stop riding those horses through your pregnancy. I also own horses but I didn't ride during pregnancy because I didn't want to put my baby at risk and any time you get on a horse you are risking injury, however since it is your job and not just a hobby, that is a bit different. I'm not really sure what to tell you on that end.

I do like how Talia put it, that if it happens I'm sure you'll find a way to take it day by day and just go with it. My second was an unexpected surprise (I was on the mini pill when I fell pregnant with him so you could only imagine my shock when we found out that my BC failed) but it actually turned out better than I thought it would. It was hard in the beginning, no doubt, but we made it work. Not everything in life can be controlled, unfortunately so you just have to take things as they come at you. Good luck, hun

 

[Beastandbaby9]

There's never a right time. Also, consider that SOOO many kids out there were unplanned, and it all worked out fine - if you weren't TTC and just happened to fall preg right now, you'd be happy, right? You wouldn't think "is it the right time", because it'd be too late for that (haha) you'd just get on with it and it'd be amazing
I'm not saying don't try to plan, obviously. Some times DEFO aren't the right time (eg having a baby, especially a sibling, right around the time of some huge life event) but on the flip side there's never a perfect time. When things aren't totally perfect, smooth and stable, it doesn't seem right. When things are (when are they?!) you wouldn't want to rock the boat.
So just think, how would you feel right now if you got a sudden BFP? If the answer is that you'd sit on the toilet and smile, do it. Now is the right(ish) time. If the answer is totally panicked, sick and regretful, then no. But I don't think that's the case or you wouldn't be here
FWIW, when I got pg with my son, after giving up on TTC for a while and embarking on other life adventures, it was totally unexpected and on paper was NOT a good time (I was at uni...) but it turned out perfect. Babies do

We just got married and have 3 fur babies, our own house (rental) one income currently and own our vehicles... trying to decide if now is the right time for us also? Both 20

 

[Jetset]

Thank you for all the replies.

As a professional rider it is difficult to give up the client's horses as they are what pay the bills however, my 'risky' ones such as the stallion would definitely be a no go!