When will I feel normal again after birth?

[Kate7590]

Sounds silly I know

My hubby and I have our 2 year anniversary on the 31st March and we have been talking about going on a romantic spa day and 5 course dinner and overnight at a lake view hotel. I LOVE this idea and really really want it to work, but a part of me just realised if Id be ready for a spa break (jacuzzi, massages, swimming etc) by the end of March??
Im due 11th February.
My mum will look after baby for us of course.

I was wondering about bleeding after the birth, how long it lasts etc? Obviously I won't be able to wear a swimming costume if I'm still bleeding by then

Any help appreciated

 

[Sarah lo]

I bled for 5-6 weeks after having my first.

It also might be worth waiting till the baby arrives before you book anything because it may depend on how he/she is as to whether you feel comfortable leaving them over night. My daughter at that age was still cluster feeding so there would have been no way i could have expressed enough milk to feed her for a whole day and a night (of course, this wouldn't be a problem if you're planning to use formula). But she was also very unsettled as a newborn (colic) and I would have felt awful inflicting her on anyone else as she literally cried all day long she was 4 months old when we finally felt able to leave her overnight and even then she still gave DHs parents a hard time, in fact they didn't offer to have her again for a whole year after that!

 

[Babybug]

I agree eith waiting to see how bubs is first.Sounds like a lovely idea though.

 

[tristansmum]

Sounds lovely but I'd wait to book. It depends how the birth goes... Vaginal or c section, stitches, breast feeding or bottle, bleeding, etc. So much which differs from person to person. Also you may not feeling ready to leave your baby overnight. I didn't leave mine til 7 months and only done it twice in 3 years as I'm just not comfortable doing it... Before he arrived I'd never have thought this lol.

 

[Celesse]

If your due 11th Feb, you could well still be pregnant on 25th Feb. If you opted for induction at 42 weeks which would be 25th it could still take another few days for baby to be born. So baby could be around 5 weeks. If you end up with a c-section you could still be very uncomfortable and not able to wear a swimming costume. If you tore or had an instrumental it might still be very uncomfortable and you would not be able to go swimming either.

I really can't imagine leaving a baby that small. For starters my babies would starve without the boobs there and the boobs would explode without the baby there. But its just so small. I wasn't ready to leave my children for even an hour until they were closer to 6 months.

 

[Storm1jet2]

I bled for 5 weeks and then had y first period a week later! My baby had colic and reflux and did nothing but scream and there was no way I would have inflicted her on anyone, that and I was SO exhausted if I had gone away I would have just slept! Nice idea but it wouldnt have worked for me!

 

[Pearls18]

I bled for 7 weeks first time. I breastfeed and there is no way for that reason (and many others) I could leave a baby overnight so soon after the birth. I would plan it for before the birth or at least 6 months later personally.

 

[cait]

It sounds like a lovely thing to do but personally I'd wait a bit longer. With my first I wouldn't have been able to leave her overnight so soon. Was closer to 6 months for me I think. Managed to go out for a few hours for a nice dinner date earlier than this though.

 

[minties]

I'd think about doing it for your 3rd year anniversary. No way I'd want to leave my baby for that long at thate age.

 

[smallpeanut]

I'd wait until bub is here to decide weather your happy to leave. I booked a night away when LO was three months before she was here and I didn't go as I could leave my refluxy baby. Total waste it's my birthday on the 10th May and my due date is 13th feb and I said no to a night away and said we'd do it later in the year xx

 

[supertabby]

I'd not book anything yet and have a delayed celebration later in the year.

Even with a straightforward birth the postnatal bleeding (lochia) goes on for an average of 6 weeks. Some women it's less but some it's longer. Your uterus won't have finished contracting back to size either so you'll still look pregnant to some degree (not 9 months pregnant but you will still have jelly belly). If you've had a tear or episiotomy, or a c-section, your scars will still be healing. And your boobs will be engorged and leaky. Basically for quite a few weeks you won't be in "spa" mode. It's also not uncommon to lose your appetite - especially if you have a bit of baby blues or have a section - so you might not fancy a 5 course meal. If your baby is late and you've not had your 6 week postnatal check yet you might be told the spa treatments aren't insured too.

That's not even getting on to leaving baby. Personally it's each to their own but we did try to let me have some baby free time in the early weeks (hubby would take her for a walk aftee a feed to get her to nap longer while I also napped), and I think there's nothing wrong with getting a night away when you can - good for mummy and daddy's sanity and good for baby to adapt to change etc. However I can't imagine leaving a 6 week old overnight - your mum would be up all night, they cluster feed at that age and if you're breastfeeding you might struggle to express enough for a full night at that age. Plus you might just not feel up to it emotionally and end up cancelling or going and feeling miserable the whole time.

I've made it sound like the first few weeks are really tough - and to be fair they are - but it gets easier with every passing week and they're sooooo worth it.

 

[Kate7590]

Thanks for all the replys everyone.
I think I will just have to see how things are much closer to the time. It seemed like an awesome idea, but now thinking about it more I don't know if it really would be. It would depend on so many things, as you say.

Thanks again

 

[baileybubs]

I went for just a spa day with my mum 8 weeks after my dd was born as it was my 30th birthday and I had a c section. I would say I was probably just about ok for it, I had a massage and went swimming and sauna etc.
But my dd is 9 months old now and apart from one night when I stayed in a hotel with my mum to watch a show in another town and left her with df, I haven't had any other night without her. And I was only comfortable with that coz it was df I left her with. I still can't imagine leaving her even with my parents overnight even though they look after her all the time during the day.

So I agree I would wait until baby arrives to book anything, and even then maybe just go out fr the day then a meal but perhaps home at night as you may not feel you can leave baby so soon.