When will it get better

[Diannam]

I basically need reassuring this will pass and I need to vent . My baby is at week 19. It's a wonder week apparently. He has been refusing his early evening nap and fussing until bedtime.

Today he has slept 20 minutes in a 7 hour period. He is fussy. I keep trying to nap him, but it only results in both of us crying. I have had to put him down in his crib and walk away a couple times as I found myself getting quite angry at him.

I feel like a terrible mother.

 

[Willow01]

First big hugs hun. You are going through what seems like an impossible and never ending time at the moment but with a six month old who went through the same I can reassure you it will come to an end. Also good for you for knowing you needed time out and putting the baby in his crib and taking time out, for both of you.
My little one has always been a cat napper, 20-30 mins every 3 hours from the day she was born, but around 4 months it got terribly worse. She tried avoiding naps, clearly tired but refusing to go for them, making it a huge struggle for the both of us just to get to bedtime. I tried everything but nothing seemed to work except swaddling and that only worked for an afternoon nap but at least she was getting something. But almost overnight one day things changed and she started napping again, back to 30 mins every 3 hours and I can tell you the relief was overwhelming, and I am sure this is going to happen for you too soon. I'm sorry I don't have any words of wisdom but just wanted to reassure you that it passed for me and fingers crossed it will for you soon too. Weirdly at the same time she started sleeping through the night too not sure if that was just a coincidence or another bonus! Good luckx

 

[justplay91]

I'm right there with you. We're going through the four month sleep regression right now, and I am at my wits end. OH had to take over the kids tonight because frankly I just can't after dealing with my 18 week old today. I swear she never sleeps anymore and I'm going crazy. It does pass, but it seems like they go through sleep regressions a lot. My 19 month old is also going through one right now, so none of us have had a proper sleep in ages.

 

[Diannam]

Thanks everyone. Glad to know I am not alone. When I am trying to rock him to sleep he violently squirms and pushes away from me. I have had some likely temporary success by changing the room where he gets rocked from his bedroom with white noise machine to the bathroom with the fan. It's like when he knows what is coming he puts up a fight.

I managed 2 20 minute naps and amazingly a 1 hour nap. From 2 months on his average nap has been 40 minutes every 2 hours and it has become increasingly difficult to get him down since 3 months, but today was the absolute worst. At least his night sleep has been ok. He usually wakes twice and goes from around 8-9:30 until 7am give or take.

I don't get too much help either during weekdays.

 

[Willow01]

It's really tough when you also have no additional support, apart from my partner there is nobody else to help and sometimes you just want to tear your hair out. We are here for you, keep doing everything just as you are it sounds like you are doing a brilliant jobx

 

[Button#]

Have you tried starting to put him down a bit earlier, maybe every 90minutes? Worth a try just incase its overtiredness

 

[Diannam]

Thanks Willow, your words are reassuring. I do try to put him down at the 90 minute mark, but he is completely awake and looks around the room while I rock him.

I know he is overtired some of the time when I am fighting him to sleep. He doesn't always give me sleepy queues and his window of sleep is so small sometimes.

I'm off to a better start at least today. He went from 8:30 to 8am with 2 wake-ups.I started to rock him at 9:45am and got him into his crib at 10am and by some miracle he has been sleeping for 1.5 hours so far, which is extremely rare.

Just some days I can't fathom how I am going to make it through and I feel like I am the only one struggling.

 

[Willow01]

I never asked you how long your little one has been like this? I'm just wondering if he is maybe feeling unwell and it's not wonder weeks?x

 

[Diannam]

He has been fighting naps since forever. It used to usually take 5 minutes to get him to sleep. I would let him nap on a pillow that was on my nap once he fell asleep in my arms as putting him down resulted in an immediate wake up or a 20 minute nap. He would sleep 40 minutes, maybe longer, I could soothe him back sometimes with a soother. He absolutely refuses the soother now.

For the last couple of weeks I have been able to put him in the crib to sleep 30-40 minutes. I would say the fighting sleep escalated 4 days ago. He did have a few extra slightly loose poos starting a week ago which has basically resolved itself now.

I do feel like he knows I am trying to put him to sleep as things that used to put him to sleep in the past just make him mad now. There were 2 different positions that I held him which worked so well. Now they make him scream. The pacifier used to work, now he spits it out.

 

[laura109]

Bless you. There is nothing wrong with letting them cry for fibe minutes when you have checked and tried things and you feel tested. It can be extremely hard when they fuss and nothing seems to work. It could be teething starting. Could be wanting to know you are around. My dd was older when she was upset if i left her, i have found she changes the goal post every 5 mins. She used to sleep on the sofa in her pram, in my arms, in the bouncer or her cot. But she will only settle in one place for so many weeks them she changes where she will settle.

Ive also found going for a walk can sometimes get her off to sleep. Or i might make a few people gasp but half an hour of tele sometimes will get her to nod off.

It will change again so hang in there. Xx

 

[mummy2boysx]

Chin up. Everything won't always be like this x