Wish I had someone share the excitment and feelings with :(

[fingers_cross]

feeling really lonely just now. my family said that i talk about being pregnant too much and they know im excited and happy but i dont have to "go on about it all the time". it makes me sad. i understand where theyre coming from and even tho they are excited, its different when the baby is inside u. i just wish i had somone to share this with who was as excited and interested as i am. me and babys father still talk and are on good terms (i chose to keep it that was for babys sake, would have been a lot easier to cut off completely as he lives in a different country) and i sent him the scan photo and kept him up to date. he sometimes asks how i am etc but most of the conversations we have are about him and his "life". he works in a bar (the girls love him and he cheated A LOT and thats the main reason we broke up, amongst other things) and is 37 this year (!) ive just turned 25 and feel he has to grow up a lot. hes very mature in some ways and extremely immature in others, its just a shame that he allows the immature boy in himself to make the choices in his life. hes been sending money over each month since i got the BFP (which to be fair he didnt have to until baby is here) and says he wants to come over for the birth. im just wondering if he does make it over for the birth whether its going to make it even harder when he goes. i still love him a lot as a person but there comes a time where if someone isnt willing to change for u, then they simply dont love u enough (no matter how many drunk i love u messages u get!).

all my family and friends keep telling me to get myself out there and meet someone before baby comes...i really dont want to right now. all i feel like thinking about is the baby and i feel another man will just complicate my life even more. since i was about 16 ive never been single longer than a month (prob contributed to my problems, never gave it enough time between relationships to work out why it wasnt right and went right back for the same kind of guy) so i am finding it very hard being alone, and very sad that my baby isnt going to have daddy

 

[dustbunny]

This is the longest I have ever been single since I was 18 so, although not as long as 16, I can sympathise that it is difficult being on your own sometimes. As for going on about the baby, I have read soooooooo many other posts on other boards about OH's being 'bored' of their pregnant wife/OH/gf going on about the baby or not being as interested as them, I think it is only natural that you and other pregnant women or mothers can actually grasp the continuous excitement you hold.
As for getting out there and finding a man before baby arrives, don't do it if you're not comfy doing so. In the long run it will only make you feel worse which is not something you should ever have to feel. You have included the father as best you can and whether he wants to be involved or not is his decision and possibly his own loss. But you do not need a man to complete you, take this time to explore yourself, be comfortable being on your own and being you.
You are a strong young woman! Stay empowered and we are all here for rants/ramblings and random pregnancy chit chat. Hehe!

 

[Mammy2Joojx]

what right has your family got to tell you when yyou should/shouldn't date?! I'd be pretty pissed off if my family told me i should start & find someone before the baby comes .. You don't need someone, i'm sure you'll do a brill job as a single parent & dating will come when you're ready x x

 

[george83]

you poor thing - of course your going to talk about the baby all the time your pregnant what else in the world actually matters!! my husband wasn't around much when i was pregnant and i must have bored my mum rigid talking about the baby it's normal for you to do so.

i know it doesn't make it any easier to hear - when people say it to me i dont listen - but your baby will be lucky to have you as its mummy whether FOB is around or not. My husband wasn't at the birth of our baby and at time i hated him for not being there but now i'm glad he wasn't it's something special between me and my baby now and even though i fell like he's taken everything else from me he can't take that too. i hope you manage to enjoy your pregnancy i look back at mine and am sad i let my husband ruin it for me by dragging me down, don't let that happen to you.

and anything you want to share about your pregnancy just come on here and tell us we'll all be very excited to hear it! xxxx

 

[cherry_pie]

I completly know where you are coming from. My husband and I split just before christmas (2days!) when he walked out and said he didnt love me. I thought my world was falling apart and it was the shock that was the worst. My baby was four months old. This is the longest I have been single since I was 15 as I always seemed to have one relationship after another.

On the plus side for you, at least you won't have any nasty shocks and you know where you stand now, while you are pregnant. I know that it is sad that you don't have FOB to share you excitement with but even though I was with FOB while pregnant it still wasnt all that wonderful. Obviously because he was wanting to leave, he wasnt as happy about the pregnancy as I thought he would have been. He wouldn't let me buy any clothes until I was 20 something weeks and really dragged my happiness down by his attitude. I know it still is not ideal but at least you dont need to worry about anythign like that. You will need to come to terms with being a single mother and going it alone, but one thing I have realised through all this is how strong I am and how wonderful my family and friends are. My world didn't shatter at all, because I didn't let it.

It's not the same, but come on these boards as often as you want because as Dustbunny said, there are hundreds of pregnant women gushing about it all here because they can't talk to their partners or family about it all. I know I pored over books and details and research so much when pregnant that it would have bored any other person silly lol. These boards were my saviour, and really no one does understand like another mother.

I def would not worry about dating at the minute, the main priority is you and your little baby. The situation is not ideal and your wee one will not have it's daddy living with them, as as my situation, but I know so many single parents with happy healthy babies. It is much better you are ready for whats to come, and prepared, than having a partner who walks out half way through a childs life leaving them feeling like they did something wrong.

Why not try going to some groups now to meet other pregnant women. I went to pregnancy yoga and as well as finding it very nenficial for my back etc and relaxing, it was lovely having that special mother and baby time to bond even before my baby was born. It was also lovely meeting other pregnant women because although we only met once a week, we all had this wonderful experience of being pregnant in common. Also if you are planning to breast feed, most breast feeding groups welcome expectant mothers so it's not too much of a shock trying to feed a newborn.

Try and accept that this is the situation you are in, there is no point wasting energy wishing otherwise. Spend your time looking after yourself and pampering yourself, for you will have little time in the future to do it. Have long baths, cook healthy meals, read baby books, take walks, go swimming, make baby name lists, read about what new things your baby is doing this month. Because this is the most wonderful time in your life, your body is doing a wonderous thing growing a little baby inside you.

This is how I feel, despite everything I would change nothing. My son is the best thing for me in the whole world and I wouldn't change a thing, even my broken marriage because it means I have him, and he is everything.

All the best for the future, am thinking of you lots, enjoy every second because you can get none back!

xxxx

 

[Shezza84uk]

We are close in our pregnancy I also split with fob just before knowing I was pregnant I'm now 12+3 it is lonely not sharing the joy but it gets easier eventually I'm happy to talk anytime you feel down I can talk baby all day cheer up x