Wishy-washy husband

[toasty6]

Hey all! It’s been awhile since I was on here while pregnant with my daughter who is now almost 4.

I had my IUD removed last month after 2.5 years, and had a short 3 day period a few days after removal that was hardly more than spotting... my husband keeps changing his mind on TTC but we did have unprotected sex several times during my fertile window. Now I’m on cycle day 35 and no sign of my period but I don’t know how long my cycles really are since I had no periods with my IUD. Prior to getting pregnant with my daughter, I had just one “spontaneous” period a month after stopping birth control pills and it was a perfect 28 day cycle... then I got pregnant, so I don’t know what a non-birth-control cycle really looks like for me as far as length etc.

I am ready for another child, but my husband keeps changing his mind. One day he says he’s ready for one more, and the next he says I’m rushing him and he’s stressing about it. I’ve made it clear he is more than welcome to use condoms since I am fertile now, but I get the impression he’s mad that I had my IUD removed (he was aware of and agreeable with my plans to remove it before I went to the OB/GYN. I was having a lot of cramping and couldn’t feel the strings so I just asked for it to be removed).

Anyways, now I have all sorts of symptoms: Acne, bloating, hot flashes w/nausea after eating on several occasions, mood swings, and AWFUL FATIGUE. Like can’t keep my eyes open. I realize a lot of these are similar to PMS symptoms, but for me usually the acne comes and stays until the end of bleeding, but now I’ve had bad acne for a week and it’s going away now, no bleeding. I also don’t typically have fatigue with PMS or my period unless I bleed very heavily. I just *feel* pregnant too. I’ve taken several cheap tests over the past week and they are all negative. I even bought an FRER test last night and it was negative as well.

The other night when I mentioned I wasn’t going to drink on our date because pregnancy was a possibility to my husband, he said “You mean it could have happened?!” Trying to sound upset but he was smiling as he looked away... I can clearly see he wants another baby but won’t bring himself to be straight with me for some reason.

*sigh*. This is long winded. I’m just frustrated. I want either a period or a positive. I can’t stand to be in limbo.

 

[Anij34]

HI sweetie,

What does the pregnancy test show?

 

[GodsNotDead23]

He is nervous and that is natural. Id be concerned if he wasn't! Men are absolute and logical creatures. They think ahead and they think analytically. He is thinking about money, time management, food, etc etc etc. So maybe there are days he truly doesnt know if he wants the added stress, but most days I can assure you he wants it.

My husband would constantly say he changed his mind, but when I offered to get back on BC hed go full blown panic and call me dramatic. (LOL!! Ironic.) He was just verbally expressing fear, but didn't know how to say "Im scared but I still want to try."

And when we finally got pregnant 2 years later, he smiled so big! Now 8 weeks in he panics occassionally, but its about money or space, or a bigger car, its never about not wanting the actual child. It will be okay mama. Just talk to him. He may not talk back or respond the way you want but simply saying "its okay to be scared, I understand". And that may be enough.

 

[Pne1985]

He is nervous and that is natural. Id be concerned if he wasn't! Men are absolute and logical creatures. They think ahead and they think analytically. He is thinking about money, time management, food, etc etc etc. So maybe there are days he truly doesnt know if he wants the added stress, but most days I can assure you he wants it.

My husband would constantly say he changed his mind, but when I offered to get back on BC hed go full blown panic and call me dramatic. (LOL!! Ironic.) He was just verbally expressing fear, but didn't know how to say "Im scared but I still want to try."

And when we finally got pregnant 2 years later, he smiled so big! Now 8 weeks in he panics occassionally, but its about money or space, or a bigger car, its never about not wanting the actual child. It will be okay mama. Just talk to him. He may not talk back or respond the way you want but simply saying "its okay to be scared, I understand". And that may be enough.

Mama, you hit the nail on the head with this one! Perfecto!!

 

[GodsNotDead23]

He is nervous and that is natural. Id be concerned if he wasn't! Men are absolute and logical creatures. They think ahead and they think analytically. He is thinking about money, time management, food, etc etc etc. So maybe there are days he truly doesnt know if he wants the added stress, but most days I can assure you he wants it.

My husband would constantly say he changed his mind, but when I offered to get back on BC hed go full blown panic and call me dramatic. (LOL!! Ironic.) He was just verbally expressing fear, but didn't know how to say "Im scared but I still want to try."

And when we finally got pregnant 2 years later, he smiled so big! Now 8 weeks in he panics occassionally, but its about money or space, or a bigger car, its never about not wanting the actual child. It will be okay mama. Just talk to him. He may not talk back or respond the way you want but simply saying "its okay to be scared, I understand". And that may be enough.

Mama, you hit the nail on the head with this one! Perfecto!!

Thanks! My man is like the "man of the men" guy. So its very easy to give advice most of the time as hes very text book lol.

 

[Pne1985]

He is nervous and that is natural. Id be concerned if he wasn't! Men are absolute and logical creatures. They think ahead and they think analytically. He is thinking about money, time management, food, etc etc etc. So maybe there are days he truly doesnt know if he wants the added stress, but most days I can assure you he wants it.

My husband would constantly say he changed his mind, but when I offered to get back on BC hed go full blown panic and call me dramatic. (LOL!! Ironic.) He was just verbally expressing fear, but didn't know how to say "Im scared but I still want to try."

And when we finally got pregnant 2 years later, he smiled so big! Now 8 weeks in he panics occassionally, but its about money or space, or a bigger car, its never about not wanting the actual child. It will be okay mama. Just talk to him. He may not talk back or respond the way you want but simply saying "its okay to be scared, I understand". And that may be enough.

Mama, you hit the nail on the head with this one! Perfecto!!

Thanks! My man is like the "man of the men" guy. So its very easy to give advice most of the time as hes very text book lol.

Haha that is how my husband is also! Although he is very compassionate, he is your typical “man”! He worries about not being able to provide or us not being happy. He is super scared to have another child but wouldn’t love it any less if it does happen!