Would you go?

[Noodles]

We received an invitation this morning for my cousin's 5th birthday party on 19th June which is 180 miles away from our house. Even if I had this baby today he would be less than 3 weeks old by the time of the party and my family are expecting me to travel up there for the party with a newborn baby and a 17 month old. We would have to do it as a day trip as we can't fit our 2 kids, overnight stuff (including a travel cot) and the pram into our Fiat Punto.

They think that I'm being rude by not attending. Would you go?

 

[faun]

This is going to sound harsh but no i wouldn't its only a 5th birthday if it was a special one like 13th,16th,18th or a wedding anniversary etc i prob would. Its only your cousin as well if it was your bro or sis then it would be different. I think people need to realise its just not practical for you with a newborn and toddler and if they don't ignore the bitching you have to put your kids first.

 

[MummyinJune]

No i wouldnt ur kids wouod get restless on a trip like that even i wouldnt like it!! u shoukld suggest going down a couple of weeks later or months later when ur settled or they come up to u x

 

[MrsPOP]

Who exactly thinks it's rude?

I would simply say 'im so sorry I cannot come to the party. I would love to come but I'm sure you understand that I cannot make any plans for long distance journeys what with being due to give birth 10 days before the party'.

If people still moan then say you will come to visit once you feel physically able to make such a long trip after you give birth.

I know how you feel, a friend of mine wanted me to make a 2 hour train journey there and back in one day to visit last week. When I mentioned that may be a bit much for me (heavily pregnant + severe SPD) and my DH was unhappy at the prospect of my travelling back late at night on my own, she kicked off on me!

 

[CLH_X3]

I wouldnt but im not close to my cousins.. if it was my brothers then yh but not for cousins

 

[RuthieCC]

I wouldn't go. I have a very close family and would normally attend cousins birthday parties but at that distance with a baby that small plus a 17 month old, its just too much! I have a 19 month old and she's actually really difficult on long journeys now. She gets bored and doesn't sleep as well as she used to in the car, so to try and keep her happy as well as timing feeds etc for a newborn would be a nightmare! Plus, you might still be really uncomfortable yourself! You could always say you'll see how you feel nearer the time, but surely they'll understand that it would be really difficult?

 

[scuffer]

I agree that I wouldn't go for a 5th birthday party, sounds like a lot of hassle and expense, it's a long way to travel for a child's birthday party.

 

[kandbumpx]

No I wouldn't go... They should understand, it will be really hard with a newborn and 17 month old... And not to mention petrol prices just to get there AND back.. Extortionate! You'll need all the money for LO, not to spend on petrol to go to a 5th birthday party!

(Sorry if that sounds harsh or anything, I didn't mean it to come across like that)

Hope it goes well x

 

[Noodles]

Thanks girls.

I think it's all linked to the fact that my family don't drive so if we went to the party they would get to see the new baby without having to get on a train. But as much as I love my little cousin I know that I won't feel up to traveling and in all fairness the day should be about the 5 year old and he won't want a little baby stealing his thunder when he should be the centre of attention.