Your opinion on public breastfeeding...

[Bex84]

Bex I went away with my parents when ds was 6 months ish. My dad said aren't you going to wait til you get back to the car to feed him? I just said no and he was like er oh right and left the cafe so my brother and I stayed and had extra coffee.
He was fine with me feeding at home so I guess he was just more concerned about what others though which is ridiculous.
Xx

haha that's my dad all over, he is pro breast feeding but is so worried about what others will think. I got told before I gave birth oh you will just have to go to car, or go to toilets lol. I have had more comments about bf with peoples perceived thoughts that them ever noticing if I was bf when I was with them. I had one friend tell me it was weird to bf over a year as its not for babies benefit, and she realised I was still breast feeding and did till daughter self weaned at 22 months, maybe she should have considered that babies/ toddlers still get a lot of antibodies then and was especially got in my lo's case since she was lactose intolerant and couldn't have cows milk lol, she really did equate breast feeding to a sexual act

 

[RaspberryK]

My fil tried to tell me that it's a sexual past a cut off point. Bizarre really. Xx

 

[Bex84]

it is bizarre, where do people get these ideas. Its not like it is sexual in any way. My FIL felt really uncomfortable about bf, mil told me I should have lo fully weaned on to 3 meals of solids by 8 weeks, and they told me lo bf to much. Ahh the lovely myths you have to compete with when you bf, our local hospital is doing a day where you can bring your mum/mil and they will talk about benefits, and how things have changed which I think is a great idea. I never take any notice how anyone else feeds their baby so not sure why people get so bothered by bf

 

[newlywedtzh]

Just playing devils advocate here. But I do think it's a little naive to think that exposing a bare breast/nipple in public to men isn't going to make them feel slightly uncomfortable regardless of what situation it is. Reality is that breasts are ALSO seen/used as a sexual object. Especially if it is a family member.

 

[vickyandchick]

If a woman wants to whip her breasts out to feed her child then who cares? Why is it that people are fine with page 3 models having them hanging out on a paper in the middle of tesco but if a woman wants to breastfeed without covering up then all hell breaks loose?
I do plan on breastfeeding but I don't know how comfortable I'll feel doing it in public, then again if I do and someone starts staring I am the master of filthy looks so all should be fine

 

[Bex84]

I have to say I never managed to expose myself. I wore a breast feeding top and bra so literally just unclipped the bf bit on bra, got lo in position so her head was in way. I always made sure I was sitting where I was going to flash everyone as I like to be modest (I don't wear low cut tops, bikinis etc..) but los head always covered any flesh exposed

 

[superfrizbee]

Big Al- I was referring more to... house parties/family functions where bedrooms are available, etc. I wouldn't expect mothers to cram into a tiny dirty bathroom stall at a park.

I'm not going to slink off and hide while I feed a baby like I'm ashamed of it. If anyone else feels uncomfortable it's easier for them to move away, or better still realise it's a totally natural thing to do. As many others have pointed out, you cant see anything when BFing anyway.

My baby was another one who hated covers and it was more obvious I was feeding when I was fumbling and struggling with one. At first I was nervous feeding in public, but as mine and baby's confidence grew it got much easier.

 

[BigAl]

Just playing devils advocate here. But I do think it's a little naive to think that exposing a bare breast/nipple in public to men isn't going to make them feel slightly uncomfortable regardless of what situation it is. Reality is that breasts are ALSO seen/used as a sexual object. Especially if it is a family member.

If women sat with a full breast/nipple exposed I could see that making people uncomfortable. (Although it doesn't seem to make men uncomfortable seeing women topless on a beach - family excepted.) But the vast majority wouldn't.

The most flesh even a most adventurous bfer would expose is the top of the breast. Babies head covers the nipple (obviously).
I used a nursing bra, and a vest to pull down, and tshirt to pull up. And I think that is more the norm than what you are describing.

 

[ljo1984]

I personally use a cover but I've no issue with seeing women flashing boob when feeding in public.

 

[Zeri]

I don't have a problem with it. I've bfed in public before - covered with a little blanky. I wanted to bf my DD in church one time (she was crying), but my best friend didn't think it was appropriate - she suggested I go to the bathroom. I didn't see why I had to miss some of the service when I could perfectly do both things (bf and enjoy the service) covered up.

 

[lovenoel]

I have yet to meet one of these elusive breastfeeding moms who enjoys breastfeeding in public and sits with their breasts hanging out in full view simply for the attention or to make other people uncomfortable. It shouldn't be the mother's problem if another person has trouble separating breastfeeding from a sexual act. It's a lot easier for onlookers to look away than it is for a mother to go hide in a bathroom or go sit in a car. Don't like it? Don't look.

I'm hoping to breastfeed as I said before in this thread and plan to try to be modest, but it's entirely for my own comfort and not anyone else's.

 

[rbourre]

I will breastfeed in public if I am out and baby needs to eat. I plan to cover up but that is just for my comfort. I will use the nursing rooms if I am out and there is one, just because I feel like I will be more comfortable. We do have stores/malls here that have rooms and areas specifically for breastfeeding.

I do know someone with large breasts who just whips them out and feeds her daughter. It doesn't bother me because her baby has to eat just like the rest of us do. I've never thought twice about it if I see someone breastfeeding.

 

[RileysMummy]

It really doesn't bother me, I hope to bf but for my comfort I'll cover up.
X

 

[Dark_Star]

I plan to breastfeed wherever I can find a comfortable place to sit. I do plan to cover up using a scarf - I have quite a few infinity scarves.

I feel that breastfeeding women need to be seen in public for the act to become more acceptable, and I will do so with pride.

 

[NotNic]

For those of you who plan to use a cover, just a tip - they're not always so easy to coordinate! A thrashing baby can make you become very cack-handed! I had a couple of friends who had the proper nursing covers, which worked well for them. You obviously can't see any flesh, but you probably won't blend it, so if you're concerned about people noticing you bfing they might not be for you. Personally I wore a boob tube over a nursing bra and then layered a baggy vest top or loose jumper over the top, which could easily be moved aside. Waterfall cardigans worked great too. Often I did try laying a muslin over my shoulder for latching on, but my son wouldn't feed covered so I would move it once he got going. The simpler my outfit the easier public feeding become.

 

[Bex84]

I would agree with covers sometimes being difficult. My lo hated them. It made her fell clastrophobic. The breast feeding tops really do cover everything as you have something over top of breast as well. My friend tried a cover and ended up flashing anyway as baby was thrashing around. You find whats comfortable for you and baby and you will find most people take no notice and the comments are an odd occurence. I was nervous before dd was born about bf in public but once we got hang of bf it was so much easier. Using a baby carrier/wrap is good for bf to

 

[RaspberryK]

I would often do one top up and one down but ds always needed my whole Boob out to latch. My nursing bras had a modesty panel which was better than the ones that just completely unlatch.
But in the summer I just wore a dress or top that had thin straps that I could pull down.
I fed in church, crematorium, passport office, airports, cafes and restaurants, parks, walking round shopping centres and supermarkets.
No one paid much attention, I think a lot of the time people just think you're cuddling a baby, unless they are really really looking.
I only ever had one comment and it was to congratulate me.
Don't make it out to be more than it is, it's just feeding a baby.
Xx

 

[HBGirl]

Embarrassed , by Hollie McNish
At first
I thought it was ok
I could understand their reasons
They said ‘There might be young children or a nervous man seeing’
this small piece of flesh that they weren’t quite expecting
so I whispered and tiptoed with nervous discretion.
But after six months of her life sat sitting on lids
Sipping on her milk nostrils sniffing up piss
Trying not to bang her head on toilet roll dispensers
I wonder whether these public loo feeds offend her?
Cos I’m getting tired of discretion and being ‘polite’ as my baby’s first sips are drowned drenched in shite,
I spent the first feeding months of her beautiful life
Feeling nervous and awkward and wanting everything right.
Surrounded by family until I stepped out the house
It took me eight weeks to get the confidence to go into town
Now the comments around me cut like a knife
As I rush into toilet cubicles feeling nothing like nice.
Because I’m giving her milk that’s not in a bottle
Wishing the cocaine generation white powder would topple
I see pyramid sales pitches across our green globe
and female breasts banned. Unless they’re out just for show.
And the more I go out, the more I can’t stand it,
I walk into town feel I’m surrounded by bandits
Cos in this country of billboards covered in ‘tits’
and family newsagents’ magazines full of it
Whsmith top shelves out for men – Why don’t you complain about them then?
In this country of billboards covered in ‘tits’
and family newsagents magazines full of it
Whsmith top shelves out for men, I’m getting embarrassed
In case a small flash of flesh might offend.
And I’m mot trying to ‘parade’ this, I don’t want to make a show
But when I’m told I’d be better just staying at home
And when another friend I know is thrown off a bus
And another woman told to get out the pub
Even my grandma said maybe I was ‘sexing it up’.
And I’m sure the milk makers love all this fuss
All the cussing and worry and looks of disgust
As another mother turns from nipples to powder
Ashamed or embarrassed by comments around her and
As I hold her head up and pull my cardy across and she sips on the liquor made by everyones God, I think
For God sake, Jesus drank it
So did Sidhartha, Muhammed and Moses and both of their fathers
Ganesh and Shiva and Brighid and Buddha and I’m sure they weren’t doing it sniffing up piss as their mothers sat
embarassed on cold toilet lids
In a country of billboards covered in ‘tits’
In a country of low cut tops cleavage and skin
In a country of cloth bags and recycling bins and as I desperately try to take all of it in,
I hold her head up
I can’t get my head round
The anger towards us and not to the sounds
of lorries offloading formula milk
into countries where water runs dripping in filth
In towns where breasts are oasis of life
now dried up in two for one offers, enticed by labels and logos and gold standard rights
claiming ‘breastmilk is healthier powdered and white’
packaged and branded and sold at a price so that nothing is free in this money fuelled life.
Which is fine
If you need it or prefer and can afford to use bottles, where water is clean and bacteria boiled,
but in towns where they drown in pollution and sewage
bottled kids die and they knew that they’d do it
In families where pennies are savoured like sweets
We’re now paying for one thing that’s always been free
In villages empty of hospital beds
babies die, diarrhoea fuelled that breastmilk would end
So no more will I sit on these cold toilet lids
No matter how embarrassed I feel as she sips
Cos in this country of billboards covered in ‘tits’
I think I should try to get used to this.

My thoughts exactly.

 

[PumpkinBump]

I am a woman (and was a breastfeeding mother too) and I get uncomfortable seeing people breastfeed in public without a cover. I personally could never do it. I pump and take milk along. And if i dont have any stored milk to bring, i go out of my way to find a private room to breastfeed. Ill never do that in public.

 

[teacup]

Embarrassed , by Hollie McNish
At first
I thought it was ok
I could understand their reasons
They said ‘There might be young children or a nervous man seeing’
this small piece of flesh that they weren’t quite expecting
so I whispered and tiptoed with nervous discretion.
But after six months of her life sat sitting on lids
Sipping on her milk nostrils sniffing up piss
Trying not to bang her head on toilet roll dispensers
I wonder whether these public loo feeds offend her?
Cos I’m getting tired of discretion and being ‘polite’ as my baby’s first sips are drowned drenched in shite,
I spent the first feeding months of her beautiful life
Feeling nervous and awkward and wanting everything right.
Surrounded by family until I stepped out the house
It took me eight weeks to get the confidence to go into town
Now the comments around me cut like a knife
As I rush into toilet cubicles feeling nothing like nice.
Because I’m giving her milk that’s not in a bottle
Wishing the cocaine generation white powder would topple
I see pyramid sales pitches across our green globe
and female breasts banned. Unless they’re out just for show.
And the more I go out, the more I can’t stand it,
I walk into town feel I’m surrounded by bandits
Cos in this country of billboards covered in ‘tits’
and family newsagents’ magazines full of it
Whsmith top shelves out for men – Why don’t you complain about them then?
In this country of billboards covered in ‘tits’
and family newsagents magazines full of it
Whsmith top shelves out for men, I’m getting embarrassed
In case a small flash of flesh might offend.
And I’m mot trying to ‘parade’ this, I don’t want to make a show
But when I’m told I’d be better just staying at home
And when another friend I know is thrown off a bus
And another woman told to get out the pub
Even my grandma said maybe I was ‘sexing it up’.
And I’m sure the milk makers love all this fuss
All the cussing and worry and looks of disgust
As another mother turns from nipples to powder
Ashamed or embarrassed by comments around her and
As I hold her head up and pull my cardy across and she sips on the liquor made by everyones God, I think
For God sake, Jesus drank it
So did Sidhartha, Muhammed and Moses and both of their fathers
Ganesh and Shiva and Brighid and Buddha and I’m sure they weren’t doing it sniffing up piss as their mothers sat
embarassed on cold toilet lids
In a country of billboards covered in ‘tits’
In a country of low cut tops cleavage and skin
In a country of cloth bags and recycling bins and as I desperately try to take all of it in,
I hold her head up
I can’t get my head round
The anger towards us and not to the sounds
of lorries offloading formula milk
into countries where water runs dripping in filth
In towns where breasts are oasis of life
now dried up in two for one offers, enticed by labels and logos and gold standard rights
claiming ‘breastmilk is healthier powdered and white’
packaged and branded and sold at a price so that nothing is free in this money fuelled life.
Which is fine
If you need it or prefer and can afford to use bottles, where water is clean and bacteria boiled,
but in towns where they drown in pollution and sewage
bottled kids die and they knew that they’d do it
In families where pennies are savoured like sweets
We’re now paying for one thing that’s always been free
In villages empty of hospital beds
babies die, diarrhoea fuelled that breastmilk would end
So no more will I sit on these cold toilet lids
No matter how embarrassed I feel as she sips
Cos in this country of billboards covered in ‘tits’
I think I should try to get used to this.

My thoughts exactly.

^ Liking powdered milk to cocaine is a little extreme/offensive.

In regards to covering up, I don't think it matters either way. I plan to try my best to descreetly breastfeed my baby, using nursing tops etc and will happily sit on a park bench doing so. I have never been comfortable sunbathing topless, and prefer to preserve my modesty, which is why I wouldn't whip my whole breast out. I don't think I have ever heard of or seen a woman breastfeeding in the loos here! Seems pretty unhygenic to me.

Here is my own poem that I have just written about feeding!

Breastfeed in public like a pro,
Or bottle feed on the go,
Baby undercover low,
Or breasts out for full show!
It doesn't really matter,
So long as baby's getting fatter!