1 step forward, 10 steps back

[hannpin]

Hi all,

I am having a totally crap day today. It should have been my V day today and I didnt think it would hit me this hard.

I have felt in the last few days that I have been getting 'back to normal' (well as normal as life can be after these sorts of things) and even managed a day with no tears yesterday. But today I am a complete wreck.

To top it off I have got my friend coming round later who is 32 weeks, and it is SIL's due date today also Why is life so shit!!!

 

[SassyLou]

 

[Andypanda6570]

I am really so sorry Trust me I know how you feel. My SIL is pregnant and due in October, I am terrified of seeing her let alone seeing her baby.
The only thing I could wish you and me is that time will ease our pain, I pray and hope for this. xoxxoxox

 

[SassyLou]

I am really so sorry Trust me I know how you feel. My SIL is pregnant and due in October, I am terrified of seeing her let alone seeing her baby.
The only thing I could wish you and me is that time will ease our pain, I pray and hope for this. xoxxoxox

Hannipin and AndyPanda

You will get through it . I'm always amazed by the strength of Angel mummies and I'm sure you're no different. I think after all Angel parents go through they gain an amazing inner strength that they don't realise is there until they need it. I believe that the strength comes from our beautiful babies been there with us, even though we can't see them I know they're with us

I went to visit a neighbour/friend about 3 weeks after having Archie. I was quite nervous. I held her gorgeous baby boy and felt myself fill with tears, but they quickly went. I didn't feel the way I'd expected (really distressed etc), I realised why, I'd had my baby, I'd held him, I memorised every bit of him from his perfect ears to his toes. My baby was perfect, was and always will be my fourth son, and yes he should be still growing inside me ready to be born in July and I know I'll always be devastated that he isn't. However the baby I held wasn't mine, didn't remind me of mine and made me feel the same as other friends babies had over the years, gooey!!!

 

[babesx3]

 

[kam78]

Hi sweetie ... First of all I wanna send you a ((Big Hug!))

I know today must be a tough one for ya, in fact, it's THE day we all dread... So, we are here for you...anytime... Xoxo

I also wanna say, my best friend is pregnant, she was just a few weeks behind me & when my Emma was first taken from me, we hid from each other... I didn't wanna see her bump & she didnt want me to see her bump.. BUT we finally talked & decided we can't hide from each other forever & I really missed her SO we finally met... I must say, I was scared I was gonna think hateful thoughts or being upset , cuz let me tell ya, I was walking around with a "chip" on my shoulder about pregnant ladies & ladies with newborns, didn't like them at all LOL...But seeing her & being around her as helped me soooo much! I cling to her more than anyone know, I wanna see her, talk to her all the time.. It's so nice cuz we talk about OUR babies all the time .... That was our plan ya know, we had no idea we each was wanting or trying, but when we got came up preg it was perfect! We had it all planned out... Both was gonna have girls & it was gonna be wonderful ... Well God pooped on that one.... : )) ~ She told me yesterday, in tears, that she begs God not to give her a girl, she doesn't want to devastate me, I told her to "knock that off!" ... I pray & pray she is having a girl.... Of course I'd be happy & she most certainly would be happy with either or BUT I just hope God gives her her girl... She also told me yesterday that is it is a girl she wants to give her my middle name.. ♥ I was completely honored & shocked... So, enough of my rambling... LOL.... For me, having a preg GOOD friend was a blessing... I hope it will be for you as well... I'm not gonna sugar coat it... After our first visit, I came home & fell apart... Soooo miserably sad BUT after that & every visit since it gets easier.... Promise....

I notice that our babies was taken about the same time.... It's 3 weeks exactly for me, that my Emma was taken.... Nasty rainy day... BLAH ...

I don't know how many time's I've told the girls on here that I firmly believe our babies are together... Running around, playing & giggling ... I find such comfort in that ....

So, hopefully my Emma is showing lil Harri around & behaving herself, sure she's HAS to have a lil mischievious side to her, I know her momma pretty dang good : )) Hahahaha ...

I still have LOTS of "greedy" moments, we I want her all to myself but I try to think she must have had another purpose than what "I" planned for her.. (Which it sucks, but guess I'm learning... )

Enough of my babbling... LOL.... You will be in my thoughts & prayers today!!!