20 week scan tomorrow, may need to go on my own :/

[Little G]

Hey ladies

So my 20 week scan is tomorrow, df came in tonight and said he's been asked to work tomorrow afternoon ( this is his week off) he said yes forgetting about the scan, thing is the money is too good to knock back and he said he would cancel if I want but he thinks should do it, its nearly 500 quid for an afternoon! and the money would come in very handy at this time of the year. I told him to work but deep down Im not sure how I feel about going on my own, I feel a tad upset as need to speak to consultant afterward also re another section, how would you feel and would you be ok going on your own?

xxxx

 

[mrskcbrown]

Hey ladies

So my 20 week scan is tomorrow, df came in tonight and said he's been asked to work tomorrow afternoon ( this is his week off) he said yes forgetting about the scan, thing is the money is too good to knock back and he said he would cancel if I want but he thinks should do it, its nearly 500 quid for an afternoon! and the money would come in very handy at this time of the year. I told him to work but deep down Im not sure how I feel about going on my own, I feel a tad upset as need to speak to consultant afterward also re another section, how would you feel and would you be ok going on your own?

xxxx

I would be OK going alone but its much better with your significant other. If its going to be hard financially then you will have to do whats best for your family. The decision is up to you and how well you will cope if he does come with you. I wish you the best in making your decision

 

[Cattia]

I would be annoyed if my DH did this, purely because I would feel that he had forgotten about the scan and should have said that he couldn't work in the first place then you wouldn't be in that position, but that's because it's just the sort of thing I can imagine my DH doing and it would wind me up! In terms of going on my own, I would rather have someone to go with me but I can understand how that sort of money is hard to turn down at this time of year. If it were me I would try to take my mum or a friend instead and would let him work but then make him feel bad about it afterwards

 

[mrskcbrown]

I would be annoyed if my DH did this, purely because I would feel that he had forgotten about the scan and should have said that he couldn't work in the first place then you wouldn't be in that position, but that's because it's just the sort of thing I can imagine my DH doing and it would wind me up! In terms of going on my own, I would rather have someone to go with me but I can understand how that sort of money is hard to turn down at this time of year. If it were me I would try to take my mum or a friend instead and would let him work but then make him feel bad about it afterwards

He's human though and it doesnt seem like he forgot to be malicious. I dont agree with making him feel bad afterwards either. Sounds like a recipe for disaster in a relationship, and yes Im entitled to my opinion.

 

[Babyd14]

To echo what pp has said, can you take someone else with you? I had to have my 20 week scan by myself not by choice, there were zero parking spaces anywhere at the hospital and nowhere around to park so my husband missed the scan and finding out the sex x

 

[Cattia]

I would be annoyed if my DH did this, purely because I would feel that he had forgotten about the scan and should have said that he couldn't work in the first place then you wouldn't be in that position, but that's because it's just the sort of thing I can imagine my DH doing and it would wind me up! In terms of going on my own, I would rather have someone to go with me but I can understand how that sort of money is hard to turn down at this time of year. If it were me I would try to take my mum or a friend instead and would let him work but then make him feel bad about it afterwards

He's human though and it doesnt seem like he forgot to be malicious. I dont agree with making him feel bad afterwards either. Sounds like a recipe for disaster in a relationship, and yes Im entitled to my opinion.

Yeah I'm sure he didn't forget on purpose! It just bugs me how these things are such a big deal to us women, we think about them and plan for them weeks and weeks in advance but with men it can just slip their minds. This is how my DH is anyway, I'm always having to remind him about arrangements for the kids / appointments etc. Maybe the OP's OH isn't like this but I do think it's often left to women to worry about and plan for these things.

 

[kiwilove]

Oh this sucks!!!
My DH hasnt been to any of my appointments, not once since becoming pregnant...due to work so I understand. I told him about the 20 week scan two and a half months ago and told him if he didnt come, then he would have to wait until birth to find out the sex. The 20 week scan is the only one I would be upset about if he didnt come. He booked work off the day after I told him and he came home last week saying they couldnt find anyone to take his shift and that he would need to work...and I told him to work it out because if he didnt come then I wouldnt find out the sex. I have always wanted to wait until birth to find out sex but he cant handle the suspense so I gave in and decided we would find out the sex...Our agreement was that he be there.
If he cant go with you then try and find someone else who can...I couldnt imagine going alone. If you are sad he cant be there to find out the sex with you then just have them write the sex on paper and put it in an envelop so you can open it with him later on! Good luck!!!

 

[Little G]

I dont think he forgot on purpose, just when I tell him stuff it seems to go in one ear and out the other, I've told him numerous times about it and yet he thinks I didnt. I could ask my best friend to go with me but I think she'd be raging at DF for not being there. Hmm, I dont know guess I will wait and see how I feel in the morning, he asked me to change the appointment but I really dont want to, waited long enough and I really want it confirmed everything is ok. We dont find out the sex as they wont tell you at our hospital, you need to pay for a private gender scan, he'll be paying for that so will defo be there for that one! lol...

xx

 

[Cattia]

Yes, I definitely couldn't change the appointment at this stage. I don't know about you but I was literally counting down the days to my 20 week scan for weeks in advance! I can see how your friend would be annoyed on your behalf, but maybe if you explain to her how nervous you are and that you need the support she will put that to one side. It would be nice to have someone there as support.

 

[Little G]

Yeah defo, think will wait and see how I feel in the morning, certainly not changing it at this late notice, Im too impatient and looking forward to it, so im not waiting any longer, lol. Im sure my friend would come with me if I asked, feeling more nervous about the consultant appointment.
xx

 

[Cattia]

Good luck, keep us updated and I'm sure it will all go great

 

[Little G]

Well scan went great, everything is as it should be,
df ended up having to work the full day so ended up just going on my own, wasnt too bad tbh, yes I would have liked him there but we still have the gender scan. Had the consultant app afterward and the doctor was really nice, basically said if I want another section its totally up to me, thought they might have tried to talk me around so got another appointment 32 weeks to get my booking in date! they also gave the option of sterilisation after the section, this will defo be the last baby for us so Im seriously considering it, saves df having to get the snip later on! or maybe I should let him go through some pain too! lol

xx