2015 October Owls! | The chicks are hatching! *16 boys & 8 girls so far!*

[2have4kids]

Why do strangers think it's okay to ask if I was on fertility drugs when they find out I am carrying twins? :

This will be the case for the rest of your life lol. The same sort of invasive questioning happens with adopted kids. Twins are special and wonderful and with the prevalence of assisted technology people just can't help themselves. I'd be well prepared for a response to friends and one for strangers, sometimes humour is a better way to rebut a dumb question.

When we went to our adoption workshop they explained that adopted kids are 'special'. You'll get uneducated people saying why did their mom give them up or even worse right in front of them. How you handle it can effect the child's self esteem (more so with adoption of course than the old fertility drug question with twins) and how you answer those questions will set the tone for your kids when they get questions too. For example, 'why did the birth mom give him/her up? The educating, confident response is: birth mother created an 'adoption plan' because she wasn't ready to be a mother. Now all birth moms have the chance to be in baby's life, the adopted kids will often have 2 sets of loving families (sometimes much more people to love them than in many cases than with non-adopted kids). Educate & be firm, and if what they say offends you there's no harm in teaching them about ettiquette either

 

[cheree89]

I have a lot of catching up to do! I hope you are all doing well and welcome to the new ladies.

I have been working quite a bit as I have a big deadline coming up at the end of this month - yikes! Also, yesterday was my DS1's 4th birthday, so we did lots of fun things all day. He is a St. Patty's day baby . We are having a party for him tonight. I am making him a volcano cake (he is a bit obsessed with volcanoes right now and has 2 different models that we use to make volcanic eruptions - it is really quite fun!). My mom always made birthday cakes for me growing up, so I have really enjoyed carrying on that tradition. I even got some dry ice (so the volcano can smoke), and some sparkler candles for it. I'll try to get a good pic to show you all the finished product. I hope it turns out ok!

In other news, I should have my Panorama results on the 31st. I think I mentioned on here that some friends were going to arrange a coming home outfit and carrier for the baby that are gender specific so that my husband and I can stay team yellow. Well, they have really gotten in the spirit of things. One friend is going to hand dye, spin and knit some part of the outfit. Another is making some cloth diapers to go with the outfit. Another is coordinating some other goodies that I don't know about. Someone is sourcing a wrap and yet another friend is making me a wrap conversion carrier out of the wrap! I am so excited, especially for the carrier. I had originally asked if one friend would find a pretty used gender specific wrap conversion mei tai, but now that another friend is going to sew it, they can look for a really perfect wrap, I'll get all the features I want, and it likely won't cost me as much money. These are all ladies I met through a cloth diaper site that were in my due date club in May 2013. Isn't that just lovely! I'll have the doctor write the gender in a note card to send off to one of them.

Finally, I really need to get knitting for the new baby. I have to sort through my yarn or look for some nice fall colors. I like the colors in this outfit that I knit for DS1. It even has owls! Too bad this outfit will be too big for the new baby!

https://i1214.photobucket.com/albums/cc494/cheree89/303Q9173.jpg

 

[NDH]

Youve got some really amazing friends! Such a cool idea. I couldn't handle so many people knowing the gender before I did though haha. I had a hard enough time with the idea of everyone at my birth knowing my second's gender a few seconds before I did about 39 weeks when it finally hit me that she wasn't going to turn and would be born breech I realise it meant I wouldn't get to know first and had a huge hormonal meltdown. Wanted to find out at the next ultrasound but of course at that point with her bum engaged there was no way for them to find out and I had to deal with not knowing first

 

[cheree89]

They all live far away, so it seems sort of different you know? If someone that I saw in person everyday knew, that might feel weird to me. Plus, I have so many scans, there are plenty of sonogaphers that know before I do. I agree though, there is something about looking down and being the one to see and say "it's a ..."

 

[NDH]

I had at least a dozen scans too but none of them even checked in that area so couldn't have known themselves. Plus most were due to confirming her position so they couldn't have checked anyway with her bits lodged in my pelvis

 

[nmpjcp2015]

Why do strangers think it's okay to ask if I was on fertility drugs when they find out I am carrying twins? :

This will be the case for the rest of your life lol. The same sort of invasive questioning happens with adopted kids. Twins are special and wonderful and with the prevalence of assisted technology people just can't help themselves. I'd be well prepared for a response to friends and one for strangers, sometimes humour is a better way to rebut a dumb question.

DS - It's not just that question. People ask whatever they want. They ask me about how I feel about my child being biracial. Am I proud? Will they have good hair? Shouldn't I feel lucky? What about my poor husband walking around with a brown child...? What do his parents think? People are dumb. I agree with 2have4kids, just address it with humor, and don't take it personally. An unkind remark will slip out sometimes though.

 

[Babee_Bugs]

People always come out with dumb comments!!

My friend announced the other week she was expecting her 5th child, the comments she got off so called friends i would of been livid! "don't you guys have a TV in your house???"... and a few more comments were. "You's must be MAD!!!" she replied with quick witted humour.

But people do just come out with the most dumbest stuff in the world!, when i found out DS2 was indeed a boy after already having a boy, i got comments like "awww you must be gutted its not a girl?" or "better luck next time, you might get a girl!" I was like WTF its not a game, you don't actually need to complete the full set...

When i had my daughter i then got comments like. "Oh you don't need to have anymore, now you have your girl!"

I can't wait to see what comments ill get this time round :/

i must say though it doesn't get any better, when they born... so expect comments like, ooo you've got ya hands full and my favourite is, awww are they sleeping all night? (I'm a walking zombie, does that answer your question?) then of course they have to tell you, that from a day old, there were sleeping all night, potty trained blah blah fecking blah... my advice avoid all strangers

 

[GingerPanda]

We've been TTC for more than 3 years and had two losses. No kids. We've not been open about our struggle. But I would get comments from people like "Why don't you have kids yet?" "When are you having kids?" One guy my husband works with at a company holiday party says, "You're the only couple in the company with no kids! What's wrong with you?!"

ARE YOU FECKING KIDDING ME? Those questions are insensitive if you DO know someone, much less a stranger!

And now that I'm pregnant, all I hear from people who don't know are all, "Oh, you're so lucky you don't have kids!" "You're a SAHW with no kids? You must just get to lay around and watch TV all day!"

 

[2have4kids]

I have a lot of catching up to do! I hope you are all doing well and welcome to the new ladies.

I have been working quite a bit as I have a big deadline coming up at the end of this month - yikes! Also, yesterday was my DS1's 4th birthday, so we did lots of fun things all day. He is a St. Patty's day baby . We are having a party for him tonight. I am making him a volcano cake (he is a bit obsessed with volcanoes right now and has 2 different models that we use to make volcanic eruptions - it is really quite fun!). My mom always made birthday cakes for me growing up, so I have really enjoyed carrying on that tradition. I even got some dry ice (so the volcano can smoke), and some sparkler candles for it. I'll try to get a good pic to show you all the finished product. I hope it turns out ok!

In other news, I should have my Panorama results on the 31st. I think I mentioned on here that some friends were going to arrange a coming home outfit and carrier for the baby that are gender specific so that my husband and I can stay team yellow. Well, they have really gotten in the spirit of things. One friend is going to hand dye, spin and knit some part of the outfit. Another is making some cloth diapers to go with the outfit. Another is coordinating some other goodies that I don't know about. Someone is sourcing a wrap and yet another friend is making me a wrap conversion carrier out of the wrap! I am so excited, especially for the carrier. I had originally asked if one friend would find a pretty used gender specific wrap conversion mei tai, but now that another friend is going to sew it, they can look for a really perfect wrap, I'll get all the features I want, and it likely won't cost me as much money. These are all ladies I met through a cloth diaper site that were in my due date club in May 2013. Isn't that just lovely! I'll have the doctor write the gender in a note card to send off to one of them.

Finally, I really need to get knitting for the new baby. I have to sort through my yarn or look for some nice fall colors. I like the colors in this outfit that I knit for DS1. It even has owls! Too bad this outfit will be too big for the new baby!

https://i1214.photobucket.com/albums/cc494/cheree89/303Q9173.jpg

Those are cute overalls! I'm a little burned out after knitting so much for my gf's shower a few weeks ago. I'd really like to pick some projects out for our future wee sprog too. Do you use Ravelry.com?

 

[Babee_Bugs]

We've been TTC for more than 3 years and had two losses. No kids. We've not been open about our struggle. But I would get comments from people like "Why don't you have kids yet?" "When are you having kids?" One guy my husband works with at a company holiday party says, "You're the only couple in the company with no kids! What's wrong with you?!"

ARE YOU FECKING KIDDING ME? Those questions are insensitive if you DO know someone, much less a stranger!

And now that I'm pregnant, all I hear from people who don't know are all, "Oh, you're so lucky you don't have kids!" "You're a SAHW with no kids? You must just get to lay around and watch TV all day!"

People are just soo in-sensitive!

 

[Dark_Star]

My NT scan has been moved ahead by 1 whole week due to babies measuring ahead. It's on the 25th now!

 

[Rainstorm]

Lucky you!! How exciting!!

 

[Babee_Bugs]

Eeek Darkstar, so exciting!

Ive got my very 1st scan on the 1st of April!!!

Is anyone else still waiting for their 1st Scan??? x

 

[tallybee]

Gosh yes some people are super insensitive.

I'd still be waiting for my first scan if I hadn't have paid for the private one. 31st march is the first standard one including nt.

Not much news her lol x

 

[xCherylx]

That's exciting dark_star not long at all to wait! My dating scan isn't until 24th so it feels like such a long time to wait and see if everything is ok!

 

[pink_bow]

That's great dark_star!
My NHS scan is on the 30th march. I'll be 14 weeks so looking forward to seeing how baby will have changed

 

[GingerPanda]

I'm having a private scan Saturday, since my doctor's office refuses to do 12 week scans.

 

[3boys]

Can you imagine the comments I get? With this being my 7th child I don't get congratulations any more. I get strange looks and asked if I'm upset.

 

[cdelmar]

Can you imagine the comments I get? With this being my 7th child I don't get congratulations any more. I get strange looks and asked if I'm upset.

Wow, definitely insensitive reactions!

 

[cheree89]

Those are cute overalls! I'm a little burned out after knitting so much for my gf's shower a few weeks ago. I'd really like to pick some projects out for our future wee sprog too. Do you use Ravelry.com?

sure do...I don't chat on the forums or loads pics though. I only grab patterns and inspiration.