2016 May Miracles

[crystal8]

I am very lucky that my dh does almost all the cooking and most of the dishes. I do the rest of the cleaning. I hope to be able to balance things ok, especially with dh being so involved. I really really love what I do so I can't imagine giving it up completely plus well financially I am the bigger income earner so it would be really difficult for us. If in the future someone needed to stay home dh would probably want the spot anyway. I am really impressed by SAHMs though! My best friend is one and she loves it. I think it's great these days that people have so many options to find what works best for their family.

 

[crystal8]

I've been a SAHM since my first was born, and for us, it's not financial feasible for me to go to work, because we'd spend more on childcare than I would make! (I'm a teacher, and Utah is one of the lowest paying states for teachers). Both mine and DH's parents live nearby, but all of them work, so they've never been an option for childcare. Plus, when DH and I got married, we decided that we wanted me to be at home with the kids if at all possible, and we were willing to scrimp to make it happen if need be. Thankfully, DH seems to get a raise every time we have a baby, so we've been doing okay.

It makes me mad when I hear about what teachers are paid in the U.S. But I'm glad you've been able to make things work so that everyone's happy.

 

[ja14]

I mentioned before I'm hoping to stay at home. I know I'd have a little money over if I worked, but a large chunk of it would be spent on childcare. I feel like I could utilize our money better if I wasn't working, and I have a few different ways I plan to make a small amount of money at home. So I really feel like it won't be worth it for me to go back to my full time job.

 

[NZKiwi]

In NZ we can take up to a year off, and your work place has to hold your job for you, unfortunately only 18 weeks of that is paid, and its paid by the govt, so for most people a massive pay cut, but its better than nothing.

We earn good money combined and are saving as much as we can so I can take unpaid leave until seahorsey is 7 months, which is when I will return to full-time work. Even though half of my salary will go to daycare it will enable us to keep saving. I wish I could be a sahm but its just not financially possible, with some other life goals we have in mond. I also just finished my post grad quals and my job is in the industry I trained for (Museum and heritage, I work in archives) and its a competitive industry and hard to get jobs. I'm one of the few from my class to have gotten work in the industry. I might have a sneaky look for part time museum jobs while I'm on mat leave though doesn't hurt to look!

I agree, I think whatever works for your family is what is best. I just wish the role of parenting was looked more favourably upon by govts and legislators so people had more of a choice and finances weren't suchvq consideration in maternity leave

 

[NZKiwi]

(Excuse typos please, am on my phone)

 

[Flossie_Aus]

We live on an estate and our business (brewery, restaurant, function facilities) is ~50 metres from the house. So hubby will take a few days off to settle, then he can return to work yet never truly leave home. Plus whenever I'm ready I can return to work (events planning) and take Bub with me. Having your own business is so hard sometimes, but I do like this perk lol!

 

[drjo718]

We only get 4 weeks paid at 60%, but my job is held for 13 weeks. I'm also required to drain my vacation time bank and even then that won't come close to covering my time off. DH doesn't get any leave and it'll be their busy time at the resort so he won't have any days off.

 

[TTDuck]

I'm going back to work even though I would love to stay home, but I already reduced my hours to 32 instead of 40 already and get to work from home 1-2 days. I'm an engineer so make a decent income. Unfortunately I live in California so a lot of my husband’s income goes to the mortgage making mine a bit more necessary for the basics. We could make it work (maybe...) if I went down to part time – the hard part is the health insurance which is under my job since it's lot cheaper that way. Not sure how we would do with the health insurance under my husband. Our goal is to keep me working at my current level until we have a 3rd baby then switching to part time. Hoping this one is an easy baby so I can have the next spaced more closely!

I’m planning on taking about 3 months off including 2 weeks before for this one. I did 2 months after my first and didn't take any time off before, but with a toddler around I'll probably want more. In California you get up to 4 weeks of short term disability (55% of your normal pay) before the baby is born (they usually start at 2 weeks before the due date in case the baby is late), 6 weeks of STD after a normal birth (8 weeks for c-section), and then 6 weeks of family leave time which can be used at any time in the following year. I spaced my family leave out for vacations/holidays with my first so I'll do the same with whatever time I have!

 

[TTDuck]

and my anatomy scan is tomorrow! yay!

 

[TTDuck]

spiffy - I was just in Utah last week visiting my family! (they left me a few years ago because of the crappy economy here). The snow and cold reminded me why we are paying the horrible home prices down here! lol!

 

[Spiffynoodles]

TTDuck, yep, it's definitely cold and snowy here! I don't mind it before Christmas, but once January hits, I'm ready for it to be gone. Good luck at your anatomy scan tomorrow!

Drjo, that's horrible! My DH only got 3 days off with his last job, and that was rough. His new job lets him take a week, which is better, but still doesn't seem quite long enough! I can't imagine having your DH get no time off.

Crystal, the teacher pay in the US is seriously screwed up.

 

[cookielucylou]

I've been a SAHM for 5 years now since the eldest was born, thats partly why we decided to have all 3 fairly close together.
Its going to be odd finding a job in a few years :-/

 

[Em260]

It's so interesting to see what everyone does for a living and what the plan is for after baby is born. I'm a dentist so I'll be taking a year off after this baby is born and then hopefully starting my own practice. I didn't get to stay home with my DD as long as I would have liked because I was still in dental school and I'm still bitter about that . I feel like I missed out on so much with her.

I'll be relishing the SAHM position while it lasts and then hopefully transition into working full time easily because my DD will be in preschool at that point and my DS will be older. It was so hard for me to leave DD when she was so little. I think if she had been at least a year old I would have felt better about everything. We do have a wonderful nanny that's been with us since DD was an infant, so I'm lucky in that regard, and she will be helping us once I'm back to work.

I wish I could just be a stay at home mom forever but DH is not on board with that at all (even though we could easily live on his income alone) and I have student loan debt from dental school up to my eyeballs

DH didn't take any time off when I had my DD and probably won't this time either because he owns his own business and spring is his busy season.

 

[Em260]

Hi ladies :wave: a few of you may remember me from thge start of the thread. I have been quietly watching all your updates and excitement and now very excited to say I had a bfp again! Fingers crossed for a sticky bean this time. Happy new year ladies xx

Congratulations Mrsmax!! I'm so happy for you!! Wishing you a healthy and happy nine months!

 

[NZKiwi]

Good luck at your scan ttduck

Agree Em, it is interesting to see what everyone does!

 

[Spiffynoodles]

I wish I could just be a stay at home mom forever but DH is not on board with that at all (even though we could easily live on his income alone).

That makes me sad. Do you mind me asking why he doesn't want you home with the kids?

 

[Em260]

I wish I could just be a stay at home mom forever but DH is not on board with that at all (even though we could easily live on his income alone).

That makes me sad. Do you mind me asking why he doesn't want you home with the kids?

Trust me, it makes me sad too. However, I did a total 180 when I had my DD. Prior to that I was a full time working professional and then in dental school. I always planned to be a working mom and that was what we agreed to and I guess that was the person he thought he married. Once I had my DD I realized I did not want be away from her. I think if I really put my foot down he would go along with whatever I want to do, but I worry that he would eventually resent the fact that I'm not bringing in any income.

And then there is the student loan debt from dental school. It's really not fair for him to shoulder that burden since it was my (poor) decision to go to dental school. I'm really envious of women who get to be stay at home moms though!

 

[Spiffynoodles]

Em, I'm so sorry. Maybe in time he'll change his mind.

 

[TTDuck]

Found out at my scan today I have a low placenta (placenta previa). Baby looked good and was moving around a lot though! I'll have another scan at my next appointment to check the position. I take a while to show so I hope it'll be enough for the placenta to go higher! Here's a big yawn picture the face shots freak my husband out! Lol!

 

[NZKiwi]

Just had my scan. We are having a boy, I'm so happy!!!