2nd FS appointment update

[FJL]

This is going to be a really long post...

Cannot believe our appt yesterday. So we go in there, he goes over all my tests. My FSH and LH ratio was a bit low in my blood test which he said is normal mid cycle but can be systematic of other things, he then said my right ovary looks borderline polycystic but my left one is great. My uterus isn't bicornate but articulate which should pose no probs.

Even though I ovulate and my progesterone levels are good he wants to put me on f'ing clomid for 4-6 months and to go home and keep trying. I'm so upset, I just don't feel like I can handle another 6 months of BFN's, AF, making up symptoms etc

BUT, if I was over 30 he would be starting IVF treatment ASAP.

Now, the scientests from Sydney IVF will be up in May so he will call us to get a sperm wash etc on DH so if clomid doesn't work (which I don't see how the fu*k it will with homer sperm) they will know if we will do IVF or ICSI.

Just totally not what I was expecting from today...i'm so over this waiting bullshit and now because i'm 'young and have plenty of time' I must wait some more...

I'm so confused. The other thing that pisses me off is when I say to him 'I read such and such' he tells me not to believe anything I read and disregards everything. I asked him what the side effects and risks were associated with clomid and he tells me NOTHING, ZILCH, NADA. Then I read the phamplet (and I know they have to include everything) and find a lovely long list of shit that could happen.

You know what? I didn't even go to bed the night before the appt, I stayed up all night because I was so excited about this appointment and now this has happened.

He reckons we have a 60-70% chance of falling preg on clomid in 4-6 months and I should be thrilled about that and be trusting him but I just feel like its never going to work. I know thats a shitty attitude to have but I ovulate so why the fuck is he giving me drugs to make me ovulate? Wouldn't that be like giving chemo to someone who doesn't have cancer???

Anyway, after sleeping on it DH and I have decided that we're going to seek a 2nd opinion. I'm going to the doctor on Wednesday to get a referral and i'm guessing it will be a good month or so before I can get in.

We just want to get pregnant and have a baby and we're just so sick of how hard this is, how long this is taking and now we're having to fight to start some treatment...it sucks

I will keep you all updated but i'm just in limbo right now, back to having no direction or time frame. Oh will this EVER happen???

 

[maz]

Hi FJL

Sorry to hear you're not having much luck. I too am on clomid. I ovulate regularly, my bits function normally, and DH's swimmers are 'good quality'. I have been put on clomid to give me a bit of a boost, after that I'll have to go down the ICSI/IUI/IVF route. Waiting list for NHS is 18 months, or we can go private within a couple of months.

Good luck with your second opinion, and try to be positive about the clomid. Plenty of girls here seem to have got their BFP within the first couple of cycles.

xx

 

[FJL]

Thanks Maz, but the reason i'm questioning the FS is because we are dealing with male factor infertility. To me, it doesn't make sense because now matter how extra fertile the clomid makes me if the sperm can't get there then they can't get there.

I mean, 18 months of trying if they were going to get there you'd think they'd get there by now...

 

[Phexia]

Wow that sounds really stupid! I'd be really mad if I were you. Sounds like this doc is just talking out of his a** I mean "no side effects of clomid" and giving it to you in the first place when ovulation isn't the problem!! Good luck with that second opinion.

 

[avistar]

AWW I am sorry that he didn't tell ya what you were hoping to hear... I would at least try the clomid...it might make you O more eggs thus giving the sperm more of a chance to get at an egg BUT I don't understand why they want to put you on clomid when DH has low mobility ???? that doesn't make much sense to me...so I do understand your frustration with that most def!!! Another opinion is wise though since you are not stratified. I am thinking about you all the time and really really just want you both to be happy and get that baby of your dreams!!!

 

[Helen]

That's terrible.

I hate the way they just dish out Clomid like sweeties. I think you're right going for a 2nd opinion even if you have to wait a month. It's ridiculous that if you were older you'd be going for IVF.

It's bad enough suffering from IF without having to fight for decent care along the way.

Good luck

 

[wannabmum]

I have just read your post huni n I'm sooooooooooo mad for you right now, as Helen said I think you are doing totally the right think seeking 2nd opinion, to me there is no sence AT ALL in giving you Clomid as u said u ov every month is male factor that is the proplem, and as for the comment of because ur under 30, that pisses me off so much just because u are younger doesn't make IF hust any less or your longing for a baby not as great we were faced with that attitude as well, that why we are not priority with the NHS and even when we went down the private route we got comments like what made you decide to go privaite you are still young and plenty of time to have a family threw the nhs (that was from docs at private clinic) and when I tried to explain it was just case of well your just babies compared to the people we get in here now at end of day oh will be 30 this year but that doesn't matter as far as they areconcerned they only look at me being 22!! Anyway sorry to ramble just these "specialists" really piss me off u can tell majority off them haven'y felt the pain of infertility first hand!!! Keep u chin up sweetie and if u ever need to talk u know where I am, I'm so so sorry and hope 2nd opinion comes threw quickly.

xxx

 

[Carolina]

i agree with the other girls! Id be angry if i was you and the whole 'your young thing' grrr im sick of hearing that so im sure you are too! I would take the clomid in the meantime when your waiting for referal!

 

[tinkerbell123]

Hi i ws just reading your post, how horrible!! I know what you mena about the age thing me and my partner are in early 20`s dont smoke are fit and well(drink but not much) and for that reason we have been fobbed off for 14 months by doctors saying "your young it will happen" What a load of crap im convinced they are going to string me along till im in nearly 30 and fertlity drops GRRRRRRRRRRRR! Had mc last month so at least everything is ok but ive learned one thing about ttc DOCTORS DONT GIVE A CRAP!!!!
Hope you get sorted really soon xxx

 

[FJL]

Thanks girls.

Helen and wannabemum - I know you 2 especially know where i'm coming from with this. Its like i'm having to fight even more through this as if it wasn't hard enough already

I will do a cycle of clomid (AF should be here in the next few days, I start on day 2) just so i've at least tried it then will see what this other FS says. I know a girl who is doing IVF through this new clinic and she reckons they're great.

 

[MrsF]

Good on you gal for having the b*lls to go for a second opinion and standing your ground - but ain't it a f-er that that is what you gotta do! I'm 31 and the GP said to me last year (bearing in mind we've been trying since Nov 05) that i may have to wait til i'm 35 for the same reasons your doc said!!!!!!!! WTF!!!!!! After a bit of foot stompin, we started our tests in Nov last year. I can completely relate to you feeling pants about potential 6 mths BFN and AF - it does get tedious (to say the least....) huh?!

Good luck and lots of positive vibes being sent your way for your 2nd opinion hun,

x x x

 

[miel]

i do agree ...get a second opinion ! i never got the 30 years old mark either ...because what happen if you wanted a second child ? before you get to the 30 ? if we have trouble to make one in the first place most likely trying for a second one past 30 will be harder because we had to wait for the first one to be 30 to raise concern...i hope i am making sens with the age thing...

 

[FJL]

Thanks MrsF at first I thought I was being a coward getting a 2nd opinion, feeling as though I was chucking a hissy because I wasn't getting what I wanted. Then I realised that I am actually being brave, not a coward because it does take balls!

Miel - my thoughts exactly. I mean everyone gets told not to leave it too late to have kids, and then when you don't leave it too late and there are problems they won't do much anyway! We would love to have 3 kids (though right now 1 would be amazing) and we don't want to be 'old' parents.

I will def keep you all updated and will let you know how I go on a cycle of clomid and when my 2nd opinion FS appt is.

 

[polo_princess]

Ahhh no just when your thought things were swiftly moving along!! Im stuck in limbo a little behind you on this journey but i know how frustrated id feel if my doctor just pinged me onto clomid.

Id go get a second opinion too if i were you hun, if your not happy with one outcome theres no reason why you shouldnt get another opinion.

I guess if you at least give clomid a try for a month or two then nobody can say you didnt try eh!!

Good luck hunni

 

[diva4180]

good luck with the second opinion hun, i agree with everyone else on this, it doesn't make sense for the doc to do that. big to you!

 

[Arcanegirl]

Definatley get a second opinion, i had a doctor dish me out clomid even though i ovulated fine. I went back for a second opinion, turned out the doctor didnt have all the info (some of my resutls went missing) so he was just handing out the easiest thing he could.

Its really sucks about the age thing. We have the same sorta prob aswell, whilst i am only 21 Rob is 33 and its his age that we dont want to wait too long with.

 

[Vickie]

Good luck with getting the second opinion. I hope this second doctor is more caring and listens more to you, and hopefully makes an informed decision.

 

[Wobbles]

Blooming hell!

Good luck hun getting a second opinion & big

 

[avistar]

Awaiting the results from your 2nd opinion ~thinking of you~