2nd MC :(...back to TTC

[3Doglover]

Hello every one,

I wish I could say I'm happy to be here, but the truth is, none of us are. I just got of the phone w/my OB office and she informed me that my HCG level has dropped from 135 to 49 and that I should expect to start bleeding in a few days. She told me that I have to follow up next week to make sure the level returns to 0. I feel like some one has kicked me in the throat and that I'm pretty much dead inside. We have been TTC #1 since January of this year, and I also had a MC in April.

I don't understand what happened? I have been feeling fine and haven't had any signs of having a MC w/this one, just the doctor telling me it's going to happen and I just have to wait for it to start.

So...that's my story. I will say that I am glad I found this site where I can get some support from other women who are experiencing the same deal.

 

[wookie130]

What a shame...I'm so sorry for your loss. Please allow yourself time to grieve, and to accept what is happening. There are so many women on here who are experiencing this, or have been through it, but each loss I read about cuts right through my heart, as I know what the heartache is like. Take care of yourself, we WILL persevere, and have our babies when the time is right.

 

[lilmamatoW]

3Doglover, so sorry for your loss. I agree with wookie130, allow yourself time to grieve and mourn. I know it's hard and painful. You will survive though, and you will grow stronger.

 

[patiently]

Hun im so sorry...i know how your feeling i lost my second baby on June 20th and lost my first on Feb 4th...its so difficult to go through every emotion under the sun...you have pure excitement and nervousness when you see your BFP for the second time and are convinced that this one will stick as bad luck cant strike twice...right?...then its all taken away again...!! and your back in the ttc race all over again...i also didnt know that i would miscarry until my dr's told me it wasnt a viable pregnancy and wait for it to end...i bled for the entire duration of my pregnancy which was 8 weeks...though i didnt start to mc until...4 weeks after my BFP!! take it one day at a time...is the best advice i can give you and release everything that you feel..i tried to keep my feelings bottled up as no one i know has had one miscarriage let alone two and i found it hard to confide in people...but this wasnt good for me as small things would trigger off my real feelings and i would sob endlessly...my first few days i didnt come out of the house..i just cried...and asked why me? it helped me to come to this site and rant when i needed to...the support on here is amazing...the sad thing is that sometimes there are no explanations as to why we lose our little ones...but more times than none i do believe that there may have been something wrong and our bodies recognize this...and we begin to miscarry...however i do believe that we will be blessed with another baby and go on to have a successful pregnancy...just because we have lost two doesnt mean that we will lose another one...we are just as likely to go on and have uneventful pregnancies as anyone else...sometimes i go to the pregnancy after loss forums as there are so many women who have had two mc's and go on to have healthy babies...and its really encouraging to hear their stories...i really do hope you feel better soon...but time is a real healer...if you ever need to talk or rant feel free to message me...sending lots and lots of hugs your way x

 

[3Doglover]

Thanks everyone. I just try to keep telling my self that at least we know we can get pregnant and when that one finally sticks, it will be that much more special. Thanks for all the support. I will allow my self time, but it sucks that this news had to happen today because there is an event I have to go to tonight and try to put on my happy face, but otherwise I wouldn't be leaving the house either. I agree wookie130, we will all be successfull!

 

[Madrid98]

I've come across this thread which states exactly what I'm going through myself at the moment. On the 2nd of August I was told I was going to mc as my little bean was smaller than 10wks along and they couldn't find the hb. I couldn't believe the same thing was happening to me again and exactly at the same time as the first mc. I've cried and for a few days I was trying to find answers but I'm afraid there's no answer that will return our babies or that'll make us feel any better.

Only time will help us to move on and I trust we'll get our pregnancies & babies sooner or later. It's only a matter of time and for whatever reason this wasn't our moment. As painful as it is, I believe is better to look to the future with a positive attitude as what has happened cannot be changed and there's no point in killing ourselves for something that's out of our hands.

If you believe in God, use your faith to help you, and if you don't believe just think as patiently said that probably there was something wrong and our bodies rejected it.

Maybe we can support each other in this new journey that we're starting again. I've decided I'm going to start a TTC journal because I find it very helpful to be able to express your feelings as you go through every step of the way.

XX