3 yo WONT poo in toilet....any advice?! Ill try anything!!

[Elli21]

Tom is 3 and he still will not poo on the toilet.

He says hes scared, but he cant tell me why, and to add to it, he still sits on the toilet to do a wee.

If i do not put a nappy on him he will hold it in for DAYS, and when he can no longer hold it, he will just poo in his pants.

He knows when he needs to go, cos he will ask for a nappy to be put on.

Ive tried giving him books to read whilst on the loo.
Ive tried waiting it out and playing stubborn buggers.

I just dont what what else to try?!
Any advice would be greatly appriciated! xx

 

[leeanne]

My daughter was the same way. She went pee on the toilet at 2 but up until she was 3 she asked to have a diaper on when she had to poo. One day she was having an accident before I could get her diaper on and midway through it I sat her on the toilet and she finished. After that, no more fear.

Many kids are like this, hon.

 

[Elli21]

Thanks Leeanne, so do you think its a case of "he'll do it when hes ready?"

 

[leeanne]

I do What I would do is keeping talking to him daily about it.

 

[Elli21]

Thankyou

 

[MikieC]

Hi Elli21,

Have you tried a reward chart? My daughter had severe constipation problems from refusing to go to the toilet up until the age of 6.

I used to have a chart on the back of the toilet door with stickers. It was a picture of a pony (we called it the pony chart) and every time she did a poo in the toilet she was allowed to to put a sticker on the pony. The aim of the game was to try and fill the pony with stickers and when it was full she got a certificate (just made up in Word) and we pinned that up on her wall.

It was meant to encourage her to see the toilet as a good place to be. I used to try everything like reading her favourite book to her while she was on the loo and singing together (one of our favourites was Old MacDonald has a poo!!).

I know how horrible this is for you! My daughter went through hell with this and I went through it all with her! She used to hide behind chairs and plants and squeeze into her pants!

One piece of advice I was given at the time was don't make them sit on the loo for ages. 5 or 10 minutes at the very very most.

I hope this helps but if you need to rant or talk or whatever please feel free to contact me.

Michelle xx

 

[Snowball]

My daughter was the same way. She went pee on the toilet at 2 but up until she was 3 she asked to have a diaper on when she had to poo. One day she was having an accident before I could get her diaper on and midway through it I sat her on the toilet and she finished. After that, no more fear.

Many kids are like this, hon.

I did the same with Eddie when he refused to poo on the toilet and after that he was fine

 

[Sevenladybugs]

M&M's. Give him some every time he sits on the potty. He can only have them if he tries. Find some toy he REALLY wants and put it up where he can see it. When he poops in the potty he will get the toy. This worked really well for 2 of my children. The other had encopresis until he was 7 (on the autism spectrum) and we had to medicate so that he'd stop holding it. Talk to your Pediatrician about it, because if it goes unresolved it can develop into serious problems and take a LOOONG time to fix.

 

[fairydreams]

i had similar probs with my dd it was like she was scared to go, i found if she could stay there for a good 15mins she would have done one in the end so i started rewarding her with a sticker when she 'went'.....once she got to 5stickers she got the ITNG magazine, 10stickers and she got a small toy, etc.
I found sitting at the side of the toilet with her whilst she was on it and reading her a book seemed to help as she wasn't too aware of still being on the loo iykwim? a good old sing song always worked too when she wanted to get down before time.

fairydreams

 

[fire]

I had the same prob with my son, he used to still wear a nappy at night & the minute the nappy went on he'd fill it! or if he was desperate to go under the table was his fave place.

I ended up taking him to see the Dr out of desperation & he ended up giving him some medicine to make him loose so he was going more often. He also said that kids can be scared of the falling down the toilet.

HTH