43 Should I even be TTC!

[Hope Filled]

Hey

Just reading sites about statistics at 43 for Downsydrome and other birth defects.
Have to admit they have me pretty shaken up.
My husband and and really want a child but is it just to late??
Has anyone out there delt with this or currently dealing?
TTC for only two months

 

[BunnyN]

My aunt had twins at 46 but she did use donor eggs. She got pregnant twice before that and unfortunately they both ended in MC.

 

[AngelUK]

A friend of mine just had a perfectly healthy little boy at 45. All natural surprise too.
Is IVF an option for you? It would enhance your chances and you could do testing. Expensive though.

 

[Scout]

I had my daughter when I was 46, turned 47 later that same year. She was a natural surprise blessing! And perfectly healthy. It is scary though. I remember meeting with the genetic counselor who told me I had 1:11 chance for baby having trisomy 13 or 18 (both fatal), and 1:17 for down syndrome, based solely on my age. Thankful baby girl was healthy and will be turning 5 next month. Good luck to you!

 

[Hope Filled]

sadly no, will have to be all natural.

 

[Dill]

They can test (using MaterniT or other similar tests) for trisomies and other defects in the first trimester now! We did that with DS even though I was still under 35 at the time.

 

[Hope Filled]

Thank you

 

[coraline2]

Don't lose your hope!

 

[WackyMumof2]

I'm going to put in my 2 cents worth.

Why, at 43 should you NOT have a baby?? Regardless of a woman's age, birth defects are a possibility with any age. They might increase as we get older but that shouldn't put you off, nor should you stress about it for something you don't even know yet. Personally, if you feel young enough, have a reasonably healthy life style and can provide for that baby, then don't not do it because you're worried about age or what could happen. If you were about to embark on IVF after you'd been through menopause I would feel different but there is no reason why you should not fulfill your wish of being a mother.

 

[mimi4]

You might do karyotyping to know what your chances for a healthy pregnancy are. If there is any risk of chromosomal aneuploidy (Down and Patau syndrome, mcs, and others) you might be recommended considering IVF PGS NGS.

 

[StranjeGirl]

I'm 43 and we were recently discussing trying for a 3rd (had my first at almost 37 and my second at almost 40). I think I decided against it as I'm too tired lol, but I did have the same fears you do (and I had them too in my last pregnancies, which turned out fine). Statistically speaking, if you get pregnant and stay pregnant, you still have like a 97% chance that everything will be fine. Those are really good odds. My friend and my cousin both just delivered healthy, full term babies at 43. If I didn't have 2 already, I would definitely be trying for baby. No matter what age, we need to be prepared that a pregnancy or child might have complications. Strangely, I was older than many people I knew when I started my family, and I had no problems getting pregnant, no miscarriages, very easy full term pregnancies, extremely easy and short labor and vaginal births, and very healthy babies. I had many younger friends who had something go wrong. I say always be prepared that something might not go ideally, but stay optimistic and go for it!

 

[GirlShawn]

It's never to late. Go for it! I am 42 and I have a 21, 10, and 2 year old and we got pregnant again when my last baby was 5 months old and again in December which both ended in miscarriage. That was hard but I come to terms with it when I think about having to go through worse if the pregnancy stayed and had to do something way worse in the long run. We want another baby and have been trying since. It has got a lot harder to get pregnant since I've got older. Now I'm wondering when it's time to call it quits.

 

[tw76]

Hello, I'm not sure how this discussion turned out (I realise it is a couple of weeks old), but I'm turning 42 this year and share you concerns. I'm on IVF cycle 5. (three fresh one FET before this one; one ectopic, one early loss, and non-takers for the rest). Been reading (too much) about all this and have scared myself silly as well. I think all we can do is take a deep breath and charge ahead, and see if fate, nature, medicine are happy to go along the ride. In the mean time, good luck to you and I hope you succeed in your quest!

 

[mimi4]

@tw76 - I am sorry your cycles failed. Have you considered combining IVF with PGS NGS to increase your chances?

 

[LLawson]

I had a healthy baby boy at 45. He was small. He came a few weeks early because of bp issues with me other than that everything was fine. He's 20 months now.
I had the MaterniT 21 test done early and it showed everything fine. My insurance didn't want to pay for it but my Dr. Wrote a letter saying it was a medical necessity because of my age and to my surprise they covered it at 100%
Natural pregnancy. I had tried for about 15 yrs IVF IUIs fertility drugs and nothing worked. We stopped and about 6 months later it happened without trying LOL

 

[Regin7]

Hello First I'm sorry you're worried. Sending you supportive hugs. Though ladies of our age do have reasons for that.
Here's my background.
Me - 42 yrs old
Started ttc in June 2012
dx: endo & pcos
2012 - 1 round clomid - bfn.
The following year - 1 fresh ivf with 5day 2 blasts - early miscarriage
A long break for the emotional recovery. Continuing trying naturally.
2015 - biopsy results diagnosed severe endo. Later adding pcos.
dh's results came in healthy.
Same year - another fresh ivf with oe - failure. Switched the clinics for overseas one (Money matter mostly).*
2016 - ivf round with de - successful. Got bfp on day 8 after ET.*Are parents of an adorable boy.*
As far as you can see we applied for donor egg as my own eggs were said to be useless. Moreover they could choose among embies so that to place back the healthiest ones. For us this was a huge factor.
Wishing you the best whatever your plan would be!