So I am going to answer with honesty even though sleep training is a heated issue and some may not like my answer. But here's the truth.
Until my little one was seven months we were the same way. She slept on me for every single nap alllll day. I tried everything to get her in the crib. Every ninja move, every gentle method. I was getting depressed sitting all day and I felt like it was time for her to nap in her crib.
I tried the no cry sleep solution and it didn't work for us. The one thing I did gain from that book was installing a nap schedule appropriate for baby's age and sticking to it. That way we at least had a schedule.
Then I read how to raise a good sleeper by Janet Kennedy and followed her method. Unfortunately the timed farmer method and such didn't work for us because it just made my baby more agitated.
So I started a routine, put down shades, changed diaper, put sound machine on, said time for your nap, put her in her sleep sack, nursed her to drowsy,then said I love you, have a good nap. I then put her in the crib and left the room.
After about a week of crying...and by crying I mean protesting. She was super duper mad....she got the message. Once the door was shut I wasn't coming back in until she slept a little.
Now at 11 months she always lets out one little cry but just to complain. She either goes right to sleep or chats and plays in the crib until she puts herself down. It is hard to believe that it is the same baby that was on me all day and only took thirty minute naps. Her naps now are at least one hour long usually more.
I struggled with letting her cry. And if she cried for twenty minutes I would get her and pretend that nap never happened. I really didn't want to let her cry because I hated hearing it and it broke my heart. But I tried everything else and there was no other way. And I hate to say it but it worked.
Now our night sleep was awful for awhile. I never ever ever let her cry at night. For some reason day sleep training seemed less mean. So she was waking all night to comfort nurse back to sleep. We all were in one bedroom. But then we went on a family trip where she had her own room. She slept alllll night long all three nights. Previously she had woken 6 times a night. She is now sleeping through the night. She was just using me for comfort, but because I day sleep trained her she knew how to go back to sleep. So when I wasn't an option she did.
Here are my thoughts...if you love baby sleeping on you and don't mind it..don't stop! They are only babies once! Don't let others opinions affect you. But, if it is a problem for you, and nothing else is working, don't be afraid to sleep train. It is hard to stomach in the beginning. But it does work, and now I can say baby can sleep on her own, she still loves me, and she wasn't traumatized. By 9 months a lot of the crying you hear as mommy I desperately need you is actually just anger at being put down. I learned the difference between an actual need you mom cry and I am mad because I am not getting my way.
Parenting is tough. You have to make so many decisions that you don't want to make. Just know that whatever you decide to do is right for you and your family. You don't need to change a thing if you are happy. But if not, maybe reevaluate. You are the mom. Make the choices that work for you! Whatever you do will be right!
it was well after 1 that I managed to put him down for a nap but only after he is fast, fast asleep
