About to break down...warning: Long post.

[schmetterling]

I just really need to vent. I am on the verge of tears. My daughter is 15 months old and just had her posterior tongue tie and lip tie revised on Friday. We have worked so hard at breastfeeding since day 1 in the NICU and have had every problem imaginable. But we have gotten through them all somehow. But I am still having lots of pain while breastfeeding so we decided to get the revision done on her ties and she did well with the procedure but I'm in just as much pain as before. And then when I was at the appointment, the doctor told me my breasts looked like they may not have developed enough tissue (or developed JUST enough tissue) to fully breastfeed and she thinks that is why my supply keeps dropping all the time. Which makes me incredibly upset because there isn't anything I can do about that and I'm doing my best. My daughter is happy and healthy and has only been supplemented for very brief periods in her life when my supply was particularly low. And we've gotten through those times, and through thrush and bad latch and biting and grinding and all sorts of other problems. And I'm damn proud of that. But I was always hoping I'd have it easier with my next children and now I'm worried that isn't true. That my body is not capable of providing what my children need. That doctor also thinks I have PCOS, but that was based off of just talking to me for a little while. I have other strange health issues (nothing serious I don't think) and it seems no one can figure me out. I just feel like I'm failing despite having pushed through everything. And I'm upset because we opted to do the procedure on the lip/tongue ties thinking it would help and I would finally get some relief (and it may still, it's too early to tell), but now I'm regretting that decision and we have to stretch the wounds and it's painful for my baby and I hate it. And now, on top of it all, my daughter has a cold. So now I'm trying to find a lactation consultant to work with us on re-training her how to latch with her new mobility. I'm so hopeful that this won't have been for nothing.

I guess this is a pointless thread, I just needed to get this all out. Thank you for reading!

 

[AC1987]

aww sorry I don't really have any advice... but.. it shouldn't matter how big your breasts are to breastfeed. Mine are TINY and I got a TON of milk out at the beginning. Of course now that I'm weaning its dropped significantly but that's alright with me.
But I wish you luck!

 

[Calif]

Aww, you are right to be proud of yourself! Don't worry, maybe another doc will elaborate on what this doc said and it won't seem as bad. Hang in there!

 

[schmetterling]

Thank you ladies! She said it wasn't that my breasts are small but rather the shape of them. I don't know. We have had some supply issues but I was hoping that was because of the ties preventing my daughter from fully draining the breast. And that very well could be the case, who knows. I'm really going to try to stay positive and not worry about what will happen the next time around until its happening.

 

[BunnyN]

Aww, hugs. I think you have done amazingly, you should be proud of yourself. It sounds very early to know it hasnt made a difference to me. Between being sore, having a cold and learning to suck differently its hardly surprizing if it takes a bit to help. As for the breast tissue thing, is it something she specializes in? Most doctors have little experience with BFing and can have funny ideas so I wouldn't think much of it unless she is someone who acctually knows what she is talking about.

 

[schmetterling]

Thank you so much! Unfortunately yes she does know what she's talking about. She's a doctor and lactation consultant. However I'm sure you can't know how much breast tissue a person has just by visual inspection, and she seemed like the kind of person who talks before she thinks so I'm trying not to worry about it too much! She just freaked me out telling me I have pcos, have to watch out for gestational diabetes, and have too little breast tissue! I only saw the woman once and she's basing this on nothing but my breast feeding experiences thus far.

 

[BunnyN]

Mmm, well she is either a genius or talks too much. I mean maybe there are some slight indicators that mean you should keep an eye on it and even do some tests but I dont think without even touching you she can say so much.