ADHD need someone who knows to advise, please!

[Conswayla M]

Hey there! I thought maybe I could offer a little help...or even just support. I do see this post is a few days old, but I will go ahead anyway.

I was diagnosed with ADHD when I was about 5 or so? Not exactly sure, and boy it was a mess growing up with it. I still struggle a bit with some of the symptoms still. I can not focus on things very well, I have trouble sometimes even following a movie. My mind wonders. I don't remember things that much, I do need to make lists to help with that. It is hard.

Knowing I had ADHD, I figured my DS may have a higher chance in getting it. Low and behold around Kindergarten time I noticed that he was having more and more trouble sitting still, focusing and being extremely hyper. All that is normal for young kids, and boys especially, but it seemed way over the top to me. We took DS in and sure enough, they said, yes. He has ADHD. He just turned 8 last month.
Some of the things you mentioned about your boys sound like how my DS acts sometimes. I will ask him to get dressed, and 10 minutes later I will go into his room and he will be standing in there naked playing with a toy. Easily distracted. If I say no to something, he can not stop talking about it or asking about it. He will whine and cry on and on until I ignore him. This can go on for hours if I let it. But eventually no means no, and there is no discussion left. If he is told...no TV at 6am. He will say okay. The next morning I will wake up to the TV on. "I forgot". Rules don't seem to stick in his head. The one thing I didn't get with his ADHD is anger. However he does get frustrated with himself if he can't do something, and his face will go red. My husband and I tried everything to help him along. His teachers were concerned with him, as he was not able to focus on tasks long enough to retain school work. Finally after nearly 3 years, we decided to put him on a mild medication to help him along with school. And it worked! He still has symptoms of his ADHD, but they are more controlled and it makes it easier for him to concentrate for longer periods of time without getting frustrated. He is much easier to get along with because his attitude is better. He still talks and talks and talks. And forget the little rules and stuff.

Routine is the best thing for kids with ADD, or ADHD. Doing the same thing and the same time every day will help. Diet also is something that can help (I didn't find it did with my DS, but I don't allow many sweets) If your boys do have it (which they just may) then I would take them to their doc to find out more. I am not sure how it works there as I am in Canada. The best of luck to you, I am sorry to make this a novel, but just so you know I struggle/struggled with the same things, and it always helps to be able to chat with someone else going through it to. I hope you can get something worked out!

 

[Bekkiboo]

Thank you for that hun, the ''i forgot'' line is used frequently by my boys even if I literally asked them to do something a couple of minutes ago!
Occasionally I will ask my eldest to go and get something, for example an extra blanket for his baby sister, he will be upstairs for ages then I'd call him and he'd come downstairs with something else completely, almost like he had grabbed something really quickly before coming downstairs!
I have parents evening coming up so intend to speak to their teachers to see what they think x

 

[Conswayla M]

Yup, sounds just like my home! And kids forget yes, I know they get distracted too. However, there is a difference between once in a while, or all time. The teachers should be able to help with it, and let you know what they think. Update on how it all goes!

 

[WannaB]

I think its sounds like your dong a fantastic job! You must be a great mother if care enough to want to change what you think is not going to be in the best interest of your boys. I wouldnt be so quick to jump on the ADHD wagon though at this point. While there are many real cases diagnosed there are as many that arnt really ADHD, I think doctors are too quick to call it this these days as an easy explainaton for whats going on. Im 41 and when I was younger I was a right little shit, if I was to be diagnosed today Im sure it would have been classed as ADHA, but its not. I have all the same signs and symptons as ADHA does and so does one of my children and a few of my nieces ad nephews. But the big difference is we are have reactions to the foods we eat. Sugars and artifical colours and flavours are a big part of what makes us go troppo and is easy enough to fix. Even to the point that I can have mood reactions to different coloured fruit, red apples will send me round the twist but green ones are fine! I think cutting out the junk food and adopting a healthy eating plan is a fantastic start and may be all you need to see a calming effect on your household. If you do some research on hypoglycemic and hyperglycemic you will also see that it matches nearly all of the symptoms of ADHA as well. Im not a doctor and dont claim to have all the answers, just would like people to not just jump directly to ADHA, the medications can be brutal and can cause damage when misdiagnosed. My plan would be to watch what you feed them and see how they react soon after, if I eat something that sends me off the deep end it can take up to two weeks to get out of my system and return to some sort of sanity. I wish you luck hun, if you need a chat feel free to PM me!

 

[Conswayla M]

I do agree with what WannaB says. Too many kids are diagnosed with ADHD, and I am sure there are many doctors that would hand out The medication without even diagnosing them. I was very careful with my choice to use a medication. One that is very mild and has the very least amount of side affects to it (I mean all drugs have side affects) and I spent a few years working out other things first. Jumping to medication isn't always the answer. I do agree that a diet can play a huge part in a persons/childs behavior. However, if it is ADHD then you can go from there. Not all children with ADHD need medication, but you will know if they do. I find that it is worth it for my son because he doesn't struggle as much in school. I feel like I am giving him the chance that I never got when I was a kid. But that is a good suggestion, check out all avenues first and see where that leads you. Hope all is well! Hope the meetings with the teachers can give you some insight!

 

[Midnight_Fairy]

Hi, I just wanted to reply here. My son has autism and few things he does are very much ADHD aswell. I have removed aspartame from his diet and I have to say it worked wonders. Its worth looking around on labels etc x

 

[Conswayla M]

I didn't realize that Autism and ADHD had such similarities! And that the Aspartame thing has made such a difference, so many good ideas to learn from that's for sure!