advice please :'(

[chloe18.]

hiia, im really stuck nd honestly dunno what to do....:'(
I'm 18, and i got a son that is 11 weeks old. i found out today that im pregnant (as the condom split) my family will most probz go mad. i really want a little girl so im afraid that it could be a girl. i wouldnt mind another baby as i love being a mammy but im afraid of what my family will think of me...i would appreciate it if anyone could leave some advice xxxx

 

[going_crazy]

Hun, it is your choice completey. If you are independant (ie don't expect your family to pay for you/your children) and can support and provide for yourself and your children then your family should respect your decision.

Make sure you talk to your OH too.

Good luck xxxxxxxxx

 

[chloe18.]

ive spoke to y other half nd he sed he'll support me in watever choice i make, thank you xx

 

[going_crazy]

It seems you have a lovely OH and whatever decision you make it will be the best one for you. Even if your family seem to think bad of you at first, they will probably end up supporting you - I'm sure you can prove to them that you are a good mummy!

Good Luck xxxxxxx

 

[MissYorkshire]

OK so maybe they will be shocked, angry, mad or whatever at 1st but they will get over it. im 23 and due next month and my family went MENTAL but now they are all so excited.
Eitherway its up to you not them but please dont have an abortion. i admit i had an abortion when i was 19 and theres not a day goes by that i dont regret it and it was my family who forced me into that and i still resent them for it.
xxxx

 

[gemabee]

OK so maybe they will be shocked, angry, mad or whatever at 1st but they will get over it. im 23 and due next month and my family went MENTAL but now they are all so excited.
Eitherway its up to you not them but please dont have an abortion. i admit i had an abortion when i was 19 and theres not a day goes by that i dont regret it and it was my family who forced me into that and i still resent them for it.
xxxx

it really upsets me when people say things like this to people... as much as i personally don't agree with abortion nd it would never be an option to me... sometimes it is the best option for people nd something some people do need to see as a viable option in some situations. i know people who have had abortions nd as upsettin as it was for them... it was the right option for them nd they have no regrets.
but back to the op... its completely ur decision... if u want another baby - go for it!! ur family may be shocked at first... but if ur oh is happy to support u nd ur not relying on other people to support u... then they genuinly have no reason to feel ill of u.
maybe speak to ur mum?? see what her opinion is?? nd then sit down with ur oh nd make ur decision.
all the best with the future hun xxx

 

[chloe18.]

Thanx, your advice really helped x

 

[mrs martin]

At the end of the day it has happened, the important bit is what happens next. If you feel you are able to cope mentally and physically then it doesnt matter what anyone else says or thinks. Hope things go well for you x

 

[Blah11]

Do you live with your parents on in your own place? Honestly I dont think it will be as hard or they'll be as shocked when you tell them you're pregnant again. My parents werent that happy when I fell pregnant at 20 with Amelie but now I'm 22 and they know I'm TTC and cant wait until I fall pregnant again lol

Good luck with whatever you decide X

 

[chloe18.]

Blah11: i live on my own, my partner works so ill be on my own most of the time x

 

[leannebabyno3]

i got pregnant when my little girl was 6 months its bloody hard work having a baby and a toddler but they have grown up together and it all worked out in the end. Its entirely down to your choice no one else has the right to judge you and as long as your happy , it will work out fine. dont let anyone tell you you wont manage because you will probably surprise yourself x

 

[Fraggles]

They might be shocked and angry but they will get over it. it must of been a shock for yourself.

 

[amylou1992]

aww hunni, do wht you think is best for you. im in the same situation where am 17 weeks preg and my LO is just over 6 months old. my little girl won't even be a year old when this one is born but too me i couldn't be happier.

i love the idea of my kids growing up close together and as other people has said it'll be hard work but worth it.

my OH's family dis-aprove saying we won't cope blah blah blah, but sod them, they live 5 hours away so they don't know how my day to day family life goes.

just do what you want and NOT what everyone tells you to do

 

[Tryingfora4th]

Hey, I just wanted to share my story with you.
I was 17 when I feel pregnant with my first baby, I was terrified to tell my parents as I knew they'd go mad and be upset and yes my mum cried etc but they got over it
I found it much easier to tell them, when I was 18 and my daughter was 8 weeks old, that i was pregnant AGAIN! lol. My mum laughed, after all there are worse things that could happen!

I'm now pregnant with my 4th at 30 years old and I'm absolutely sh*tting myself about what my parents are going to say but its not their life is it.

Good luck. having 2 so close together is demanding at times but its so lovely too

xxx

 

[EmyDra]

At the end of the day - it's an accident. It can happen and does happen to many, many people regardless of age or whether or not they already have children.

They have no right to be mad, you were being responsible and may not have choosen to have another one so soon but these things happen. It's up to you what you decide to do but I imagine having an abortion when you've been through pregnancy and birth and love being a mummy is something difficult to comtemplate.

It will be lovely for your LO to have a sibling

 

[Mrs-C]

It might be tough at times, but people cope with twins, triplets and more. It might be easier than that, as your first will be that little bit older.

Do what is best for you, your OH and your LO.

 

[Serene123]

I think you should keep it It'll be hard work but so worth it! x

 

[Arcanegirl]

Please note forum rules

While BabyandBump try to remain pro-choice on most subjects, out of respect for majority of our members that are either trying to conceive, or pregnant, we ask that you do not discuss topics on abortion and terminations outside of the 'Ethical Prenatal Losses' forum.