advice - ttc after mc at 21wks

[Lindyloo]

Hi... I am still really sad about the whole experience, MC identical Twin boys on 5th April at 21weeks.
I feel very guilty for wanted to try again asap because the pain is still so intense but we have agreed that we are doing it for the right reasons.

I am really worried about how the mc would have affected my body, my cycles before the pregnancy were 35-42 days which was hard but I wondered if you wouldnt mind helping me...

How long after MC did you ovulate?
I had a medically induced MC, how long did the bleeding last?
How long did it take for your cycles to get back to what they were before?

Any advice you can give when starting back on the ttc wagon again after sufferinf such a huge loss would be so helpful.

Thank you x

 

[toastie]

hi hun, im so sorry for your loss


I had an induced Mc too at 22 weeks, The bleeding was very heavy and lasted for about a week. My periods are normally heavy and last for the same amount of time so i dont know whether there is any corrolation there?
Unfortunately i had a doctor that insisted i had the contraceptive injection, which resulted in a huge mess up of my hormones, i bled for four weeks after that and didnt get a normal period until 4 months later.


I was the opposite to you, i didnt want to try again, the loss was too raw and its only in the past few weeks ive started wanting to try again. My fiance jordan wanted to try again straight away and felt very much the way you seem to. From what ive readon here its usually advised to wait for one normal cycle and to then try again, i think this is for purposes of dating the baby if you were to fall pregnant straight away.

Fingers crossed for you lovely, and again im so sorry for your loss but the old cliche is true, time really is a healer xxx

 

[cla]

oh hun iam so sorry. i lost my baby 16.5 weeks on the 28th feb
i too had an induced mc which i did not want at all. i had the first tablet on the after and went home and was due to go back in two days. but sadley i passed the baby the same night at home. but the placenta didnt pass so i had to have a dc. after that i bled for 10 days and it took me 5 weeks to get my first af.
i know how you feel about trying asap, i think i will only be happy with another baby

 

[Dazed]

Hi hun. I don't have any experience with your situation, but I just wanted to say sorry about your loss.

 

[Vickieh1981]

I lost Isabella on the 13th March. I had her induced too.

After that I had to have a D&c due to a retained placenta. I counted the day I delivered her as cd1 and I ovulated on cd20.

I felt desperate to be pregnant again too so i know where you are coming from.

 

[Lindyloo]

Thank you, I felt like I was wrong to want to try again straight away. The midwife said it was fine to try straight away but better if I waited till after my 1st AF purely for dating purposes.
I just think that it's so cruel to have to go through everything after, trying to stay positive is hard but I am going to try to focus on me for a bit and get fit and back into shape.. I am hoping that the time will fly by and I will have my BFP in no time.

What did you focus on to get you through the early days?

x

 

[cla]

i still have my up days and bad days when i want to stay in bed. i have to go and get the postmortom results the 19th may so it will bring it all back
do you know why you lost them?

 

[Lindyloo]

oh, thats hard. I am sorry.. I am dreading that bit but the consultant was quite sure that it was TTTS (twin to twin transfusion syndrome) nobody was sure that they were identical until they were born but Roman was so much more developed than Max I think it was obvious, we still had the autopsy to be sure.

Do you get alot of support from your DH/OH cla?
Mine has been off work for 2 weeks so that we can deal with it together and he can be there for me but I am dreading it when he goes back to work.

 

[cla]

my oh as been great, he had a week off work because i didnt want anybody else. if i didnt have him i wouldnt be here now. he as had moments where he as had to have a go at me to give me a good kick up the ass because we have got a 9 year old son.
the first day he went back to work, rian {my son} went back to school as well. it hurt because you have to get back into a routine and you think last time i did this i was pregnant if you want to talk iam here we cantogether

 

[Lindyloo]

awww, that is the same. I have a 9yr old and 7yr old and they have been staying all over the place while I was in and out of hospital which has meant I have had more time to feel sorry for myself I guess. my OH has been great too, yesterday was the lowest day for me so far and if I didnt have my DS and OH I dont know what I would do.
mmm, the routine is the scary bit because when the kids broke up from school I was pregnant, they are going back and everyone is going to be asking what we are having (gender scan was supposed to be on the 9th) and I am afraid I cant cope. I might ask OH to take the boys in first day.

Thank you...and likewise, I am always around. I dont have MSN but I am on facebook if

 

[Sydd]

Sorry for your losses hun :hun: after medicalman i bleed for 2 weeks very heavily then spotted for a week... Since day 1 of bleeding took 42 days (today) to get my first period... No idea what my cycles are though as I've been on pill since I was 14!

If you feel ready to try then I say it's fine. Only you can decide it

 

[zoefromsussex]

Am so sorry for your loss Lindyloo. Its heartbreaking losing a baby. Our son was induced when I was 18 weeks pregnant (we had a termination for medical reasons) so my situation is slightly different to yours but we've also decided to ttc again as soon as possible. I hope you have some happy news soon.
Does everybody here track their ovulation? Its not something I've ever took much notice of...just waited for af each month

 

[Lindyloo]

Hi, thank you Zoe. I am so sorry for your loss.
I did when we were ttc before and I will be doing it again. Unlike when I had the boys I had ovulation pains which were confirmed by using OPK's. I had long cycles so found it too expensive to buy alot of OPK's but I would recomend it, it's best supported by temping I think but I gave that up the cycle before we conceived and stuck to relying on my body telling me because I will getting too stressed by it, I hope it works the same again!!
what were you planning on doing, temping or using opk's or????? pm me if I can help.

 

[cla]

how are you feeling today.
i only told a few people about the baby for some reason i know somthing would happen, i dont know why? i had to get my mom to take him to school for over 2 weeks. i just couldnt face people even if they didnt know.

 

[Lindyloo]

aww, I am feeling okay today but I've not been out, OH and I have been doing stuff at home with my DS's so I havent had to face the things that upset me most, sounds silly but seeing those preggie mums and babies is just so hard
I am glad I am not the only one that feels that way... I only have my OH around me, my parents and family live 70miles away which I am finding a bit hard at the moment, I have a couple of friends here now but I dont want things to be too different to normal for the boys. I bumped into someone I knew in the post office yesterday and hid my tummy (or lack off ) and when they asked how I was just said fine thank you..
Sorry, I am rambling a bit... How are you feeling today?

 

[toastie]

Hey lindyloo, ive only managed to get online now since posting yesterday. I can totally identify with the avoiding people that are obviously going to ask questions.

I remember when jordan (fiance) took me out to try and get my mind off things the day before i had to go back into hospital to be induced. And literally everyone i saw had a baby or was pregnant we'd gone all the way to the trafford centre and i think we were in there 20 mins max n i wanted to go home.
Take time out. stay at home look after number one. Once you've come to terms with it yourself it'll be easier to face other people.
My thoughts are with you at this difficult time hun, keep strong and keep us posted on how you're doing, lots and lots of support here for you from people that understand what you are going through.
I'm on Facebook if you ever fancy dropping me a message or whatever feel free to get intouch. Sophia Elizabeth Carrington.

take good care of yourself xx

 

[QueenieMurphy]

Lindyloo I just wanted to say how sorry I am for your loss. I hope you're as ok as can be.

My loss was not like yours so can't give you advice - it was much earlier but after the first AF which took about 5 weeks my cycles have gone back to how they were before pregnancy.

Sending lots of love xxx

 

[Clo]

Hey hun i'm so sorry for your loss *hugs*

I lost my little boy Frazer at 23 weeks and had an induced labour. That was 6 weeks ago today and I think I ovulated last weekend...so just waiting for AF now though I have had an infection due to a retained piece of tissue and have been on antibiotics. I think the tissue has now passed out but as i am still bleeding slightly i'm not sure if I will know when AF begins exactly.

I want to try again straight away too...not to replace my Frazer but I really want to have a baby in my arms.

I'll keep my fingers crossed for you hun x x x x x x

 

[Lindyloo]

Hey hun i'm so sorry for your loss *hugs*

I lost my little boy Frazer at 23 weeks and had an induced labour. That was 6 weeks ago today and I think I ovulated last weekend...so just waiting for AF now though I have had an infection due to a retained piece of tissue and have been on antibiotics. I think the tissue has now passed out but as i am still bleeding slightly i'm not sure if I will know when AF begins exactly.

I want to try again straight away too...not to replace my Frazer but I really want to have a baby in my arms.

I'll keep my fingers crossed for you hun x x x x x x

I am sorry for your loss Clo, I really thought that late loss was so rare but since posting it's really opened my eyes. I hope that you get your BFP soon too.

I feel the same, I could never and would never want to replace my little boys but although I have children already this is mine and OH first one together and we cant wait to hold our babe.

I had a scare last night, had a huge (well it felt like it) amount of blood loss after getting away with wearing a panty liner for the past 4 or so days. Thank fully today it's eased but OH wanted me to phone hospital which I think I avoided because the last time I called them I was told to go in and found out I'd lost the boys, anyway, he stayed awake most of the night to keep an eye on me bless him

I am impatient at the best of times and I am worried that it will take for ever to ovulate and get back into a decent cycle..

 

[selina22]

Hi and im sorry for all losses, i also lost my son josh at 23w6d i went into natural labour due to IC (incompetent cervix) but wanted to share as when me and dh lost josh we wernt even trying just so upset and i never had a period so i decided to do a hpt and it was + i concieved her in the space of 4 weeks after josh was born he was born 22/01/2007 and megan was born 30/11/2007 so it can happen thankfully i had the stich with megan and she is now 2yrs, i asked my midwife at the time how come i concieved so quick because it took us 12 cycles to concieve josh and she said your more fertile after giving birth so if you want now is the best time i think
good luck
x