already feeling like im being judged!

[Rainbow gems]

IM 21 (yes im young)
i already have a 3 year old and im 9 weeks pregnant, i admit i do look about 14 years old and im just under 5ft tall so i do get judged for my age and always have,
i had to go to the doctors today to make an appointment and because there was no appointments for about a week i had to state why i needed an appointment and as soon as i said the word "im pregnant" i could feel everyone staring!

i feel embarrassed to be pregnant.
has anyone ever felt like that or has any suggestions for me?

 

[ChristiansMum]

I know exactly how you feel. I'm 23 and pregnant with baby number 3. My eldest is nearly 5 (had him at 18) and my little girl is 1 today and I'm 10 weeks pregnant.

I feel like not only do strangers judge me but also my family. It was embarrassing telling people we are having another baby because I felt they were judging me for not being careful xx

 

[clb1982]

Ahh Hun I can't say I know how it feels as I was 21 when I had my DD and I'm now 31 with my second.

However all I can as is you need to hold your head high and not give a damn about what other people think. Those who judge others have nothing better to do with them selves then talk about other people.

Tru not to get ppl like that get to you as they mean nothing to you

 

[Julia35]

I feel embarrassed for the opposite reason. I'm 35, and feeling judged for being too old. I have 3 kids, and people have made comments on me having so many children. I haven't even announced my pregnancy yet, but I know the negative comments will come. I guess I should shrivel up and die already, lol.

I feel very awkward at the OB office, no one treats me bad, I just feel the strange looks when I say I'm here for an ultrasound, and they loudly repeat my date of birth.

 

[leahtaba]

I can kinda relate my DD is 15 months an I am dreaing telling my family as I think they will think its too soon. In fact I told my nan a girl we both know is expecting again (similar age gap as me) and she came out with 'tut tut..there was no morning after pill in my day whats her excuse' which gabe me so much confidence in telling her as you can imagine!

I also look quite young and dread when im showing and pushing a pram!

 

[Weenie19]

I don't fall into the judged because of my age category but I feel looked down on because I am not married. Its awful.
How dare people pass judgement on others like that???

 

[bananabump]

Yes!! I'm almost 25 and pregnant wih my second, my son is 2 and a half. But I look about 18 and I'm only 5"2 so I always feel like people are judging are me. I wish I could walk around with a sign on my back saying - 'Im 24, Married, Have a mortgage and have been with the Father for 7 years!' Lol

 

[shannonleigh]

I'm only 18.. so I 110% know how you feel. :/

 

[pearlsandbows]

Can only imagine how you feel but as someone before said you just need to try & hold your head high, as long as your child is properly looked after with a good quality of life who's to judge you on how old you are.
xo.

 

[themarshas]

Although I'm 26 I look very young, only 5'2" and 100lbs so I could pass as a high schooler. I have an 18month old and I can only imagine the looks I'll get when I'm far enough to be showing again. I already get the "you can't possibly be old enough to have him"... married 4 years, just built a house, great job, and been with DH for almost 12 years...

 

[Roxie]

i was 17 when i had my first baby , i know all about being judged.
im 22 now and pregnant with my third child
(im married to the kids dad now)


hold your had up high and ignore the haters!
no one can judge you,
they dont know the details,
and its no ones business!

 

[princess_1991]

I'm 22 and pregnant with #2 and #3 and my dd is 15 months old, I got enough looks at 20/21 being pregnant with my LO so Im dreading the looks when I'm out with 3 kids!

Forget them though, if they mind they don't matter and if they matter they won't mind!
Its your family and your life forget what other people think!

 

[kimmy04]

Lol I know how you feel! When I was buying my pregnancy test the cashier asked me if I wanted to double bag the test. I said no I don't need a bag to hide it. Then she said another girl from the high school asked for 3 bags so she was just trying to be nice just in case. I told her I was excited about this and had been trying for a while, that I in fact work in the high school I'm not a student, I am married and 23 with a 2.5 year old at home. I was so offended!!

 

[18AnExpecting]

I know the feeling. I'm 18 and pregnant with my first. Thankfully my family and my boyfriends family are so supportive. So I just say screw everyone else.

 

[xdxxtx]

I get it all the time. People think I'm 16, and my older LO just turned 2 yesterday and my younger baby is going to be 7 months old, and I'm pregnant. I get judgments based on, first of all, how young I look... and also with how close together my kids are. People will find excuses to judge others, though. Forget 'em.

 

[justhoping]

I feel embarrassed for the opposite reason. I'm 35, and feeling judged for being too old. I have 3 kids, and people have made comments on me having so many children. I haven't even announced my pregnancy yet, but I know the negative comments will come. I guess I should shrivel up and die already, lol.

I feel very awkward at the OB office, no one treats me bad, I just feel the strange looks when I say I'm here for an ultrasound, and they loudly repeat my date of birth.

iim going to be 42 and im getting judged cause we trying and people open there mouthed and say im to old..which stinks cause that is bs. there people having kids much later in life these days as they did career first..

i had my son six yrs ago and one lady in the labor ward was like omg ur 36 yrs old..ur the oldest on the floor..i felt like crap!

 

[MYPRINCEssB]

IM 21 (yes im young)
i already have a 3 year old and im 9 weeks pregnant, i admit i do look about 14 years old and im just under 5ft tall so i do get judged for my age and always have,
i had to go to the doctors today to make an appointment and because there was no appointments for about a week i had to state why i needed an appointment and as soon as i said the word "im pregnant" i could feel everyone staring!

i feel embarrassed to be pregnant.
has anyone ever felt like that or has any suggestions for me?

hey don't worry your self to much, some times when the words im pregnant come out and people start to stare its because they are probably trying to see if your showing yet, I had my daughter 1 week before my sweat 16, I didn't feel ashamed then at all. i was in what i thought was a steady relationship so i didn't thin twice about it, needles to say he wasn't in the same realms of a relationship i was in. but when i was 20 me and my fiancé' started trying for baby#2 and i did feel weird going in asking for prenatals because i was trying to get pregnant and it took a while for me to feel like it was ok, i wasn't a kid anymore, oh and im 5'2 so i know about being short too, but this baby is a bit different, im not going to get into how it came to be but i was having a very hard time excepting it, because what i know people are saying behind my back and it dose hurt to feel like people are judging you on your actions even though they don't know the story, they don't relies how they can make you feel irresponsible when you have done nothing wrong, so just hang in there, and if you need to talk you can private message me, oh and if it makes you feel better my sissy is 24 with 5 kids, and she yes gets upset sometimes by looks but she just smiles says yep there all mine and gose on her merry way. as long as your happy with yourself then you will be ok

 

[2have4kids]

I've had loads of unwanted advice and bad etiquette in my years of infertility and wow! People can be really judgemental & politically incorrect. I'm sure it'll be the same when people give advice to me now that I'm pregnant (as we're all going to get the bump lol). It sucks getting advice that's also putting your own opinion/ideas down (being judged).

There's a lady that my pregnant colleague was forced to 'coach' at work who just wouldn't shut up with her unsolicited judgemental advice. She'd start off with 'no, you should do...this that and the next' and by the end of the week my pregnant colleague regretted telling her she was pregnant. So my colleague started the next week out by saying how she went to this class and the teacher said if you want to contribute try using non-judgemental language like 'what worked for us was...or our family we preferred...' It was only when spoon fed like this then that she clued in not to be so bossy and irritatingly judgemental.

I'm sure this will still happen along with the unwanted touching of the belly. I'll have to think of some pleasant things to say to people with poor boundaries.

 

[annaaabanana]

You are fine I will be 20 when the baby get's here.. I still have a baby face and youd think I was 15 tho.. lol. ppl are judging me, I do not care one bit.. it's our choice , ya know? If we want to have a baby young, than we can have a baby young!!! I just say "those ppl wont be hangin around my baby if they have so much negativity to spread while I'm pregnant"

 

[StephtheHiker]

I've already had someone give me an accusatory "are you excited" I could tell she was expecting me to say no or something like it was unplanned....I'm 27! So I feel it's unavoidable I guess...."haters gonna hate"