Thanks ladies for your replies. I am struggling if im honest, everytime i close my eyes i see him, i hear his wifes screamscand his daughters sobs. My dd been ill all week aswell so thats not helped. He was £42000 in debt, which his wife did not know about, his house mortgage and car are on top of that. I know it will take time but i didnt expect it to affect me like this. I know this sounds selfish but i wanted my dd first christmas to be really special. Just dont know how to shake what i saw out my brain.