Am I being greedy?

[lozzy21]

Then why quote me into your reply?

 

[Aidan's Mummy]

Because I was making a point. I quote plently of people on here whom I am talking to.

I have had two days without any sleep with a baby who is ill and always crying#

If my post can across as having ago I really didnt mean it to. I saw your post and made a point that sometimes people in harder circumstances have afforded it

I didnt want an argument as I quite frankly havnt got the energy

 

[Aidan's Mummy]

Because I was making a point. I quote plently of people on here whom I am talking to.

I have had two days without any sleep with a baby who is ill and always crying#

If my post can across as having ago I really didnt mean it to. I saw your post and made a point that sometimes people in harder circumstances have afforded it

I didnt want an argument as I quite frankly havnt got the energy

 

[lozzy21]

Because I was making a point. I quote plently of people on here whom I am talking to.

I have had two days without any sleep with a baby who is ill and always crying#

If my post can across as having ago I really didnt mean it to. I saw your post and made a point that sometimes people in harder circumstances have afforded it

I didnt want an argument as I quite frankly havnt got the energy

The words did come across as a little harsh but we all do that when were tired.

 

[pinkmummy]

Because I was making a point. I quote plently of people on here whom I am talking to.

I have had two days without any sleep with a baby who is ill and always crying#

If my post can across as having ago I really didnt mean it to. I saw your post and made a point that sometimes people in harder circumstances have afforded it

I didnt want an argument as I quite frankly havnt got the energy

The words did come across as a little harsh but we all do that when were tired.

Personally I don't think it came across as harsh. Lets just leave it there, you've had your opinion xx

 

[Mynxie]

I read a book from 1930's on wedding ettiquette. Back then, bridesmaids bought their own dresses.

The general ettiquette now, is if you want them to wear a particular dress, you pay. If you want them to choose their own but have a specific colour scheme, they pay. Though often people don't pay attention to this and do whatever best suits those involved.

 

[Serene123]

I think if you want them to buy their own dresses they should pick them, then the ones that can't afford as much can buy cheap ones x

 

[tasha41]

I think it's crazy that people are suggesting it's the bride's responsibility to pay for the dresses for their bridesmaids-- bridesmaids pay for their own dresses here LOL. I don't think you're being greedy at all! And I don't have the button to make the little pound symbol on my keyboard LMAO but that's not a lot of money IMO, especially when she's got 260 + a possible 100 bonus + 30 a week. It's not like she has to pay it in December does she, she could do it in January after Christmas, no??

She knows you are trying to stick to a budget etc so I can't see why she's being so stubborn about this

 

[lesleyann]

back again woo lol

Just add i picked what dresses they will be wearing although not 100% picked yet but i tell them you want to be a BM at MY wedding you wear what i want you to wear lol and im only picking cheap dresses ive not asked anyone to be a BM they have asked me so they can pay and wear what i want them to


And EMA money is bloody plenty when you dont have to pay rent, gas,elec, buy food ect and as someone else said she would still have to buy a dress or a smart outfit and it would costmore than £30 when you add on shoes and everything

 

[Lisalovesbean]

When I married seven years ago, we had a budget....and sadly that budget didn't cover the costs for bridesmaids dresses, so I simply didn't have any!!!

I wouldn't dream of asking them to pay...and I'd never bm for anybody who asked me to pay either...just my two cents!!

It's akin to asking guests to pay for their own meal...that actually happened at a mates wedding once, we all turned up to the restaurant after we had all been to the registry and were told once the starters had been ordered that we were to pay our own way, lol...and not everybody had the full meal due to financial constraints....was really bad, imo!

 

[ChloesMummy]

Slightly Off Topic but what is this EMA your sister gets?

 

[PnutProtector]

I think it's crazy that people are suggesting it's the bride's responsibility to pay for the dresses for their bridesmaids-- bridesmaids pay for their own dresses here LOL. I don't think you're being greedy at all! And I don't have the button to make the little pound symbol on my keyboard LMAO but that's not a lot of money IMO, especially when she's got 260 + a possible 100 bonus + 30 a week. It's not like she has to pay it in December does she, she could do it in January after Christmas, no??

She knows you are trying to stick to a budget etc so I can't see why she's being so stubborn about this

agreed

 

[Mynxie]

It's akin to asking guests to pay for their own meal...that actually happened at a mates wedding once, we all turned up to the restaurant after we had all been to the registry and were told once the starters had been ordered that we were to pay our own way, lol...and not everybody had the full meal due to financial constraints....was really bad, imo!

Ouch!
If they were going to do that, they should have informed their guests beforehand. I probably wouldn't mind paying if we'd been told before TBH. What we did though was pay for each person from a specific menu and if they wanted to upgrade, they were welcome to do so. In the end there was only 3 people who upgraded (one being DH ) and everyone paid for their own drinks - except soft drinks. We'd paid for the soft drinks when we paid for the meals.

 

[pinkmummy]

Slightly Off Topic but what is this EMA your sister gets?

She gets EMA for attending college, its to try and encourage kids to stay in college.

She gets £30 a week (coz of my parents income it can be £10 - £30) and at Christmas and Spring they get a bonus for good attendance. If they miss one lesson in a week they lose the whole £30.

Shes never been off college, even when she was loaded with cold

 

[pinkmummy]

When I married seven years ago, we had a budget....and sadly that budget didn't cover the costs for bridesmaids dresses, so I simply didn't have any!!!

I wouldn't dream of asking them to pay...and I'd never bm for anybody who asked me to pay either...just my two cents!!

It's akin to asking guests to pay for their own meal...that actually happened at a mates wedding once, we all turned up to the restaurant after we had all been to the registry and were told once the starters had been ordered that we were to pay our own way, lol...and not everybody had the full meal due to financial constraints....was really bad, imo!

Thats the thing with me too. I gladly wouldnt have any, just me OH, Caitlin and Thomas but my sister asked (and my mum complained coz I never asked my sister) and coz she had asked OH said I should ask his sister. Then my friend asked and I didn't want an odd number lol so my other friend OFFERED so really I would gladly do with out bridesmaids and without the hassle

 

[mum2beagain]

When we got married we paid for my oh sisters dress becasue she doesnt work and was only just 16 so it seemed fair but my sister actually offered to pay the £90 for hers because she knew that it was a budget wedding i dnt think its out of order at all hun its only £30

 

[caz81]

when i first saw this i thought as she only earnt a little bit of money it was not that fair but tbh i was not too sure what the ema was so i assumed it was her wages! If it is money she gets just for going to college then she should def be contributing, back in my day (lol) we got an education and were happy with that!!! Given as she is not actually doing anything for that money seems fair she contributes, had it been her wages maybe not!

 

[Tegans Mama]

I don't think its unfair that you ask her to pay. I've only ever been a bridesmaid once and I was five. BUT I don't like the idea of having bridesmaids anyway

 

[Danilou1910]

I got arried in Oct, I had originally paid for everything for y BM's when I started to plan, but then my dress fell through as the shop went bankrupt and I had to rush out and buy a new dress, and trying to find a dress to go with a white BM dress was prety hard. So ended up having to buy new BM dresses too. So all my Bm's offered to pay for there dresses and shoes, but I paid for their second dress and they covered their shoes. And my sis was 17 at college and earing about £25 a week. If they have asked you to be BM then I don't see why it's so bad for them to pay, you are looking for budget dresses not being a bridezilla and exspecting them to pay £100's of pounds.

I got my dresses off ebay for £38 frim china. They were amazing and everyone comented on them on the day. If you want the shop on ebay hun i'll PM you a link, here's pic:https://https://www.photobox.co.uk/my/photo?photo_id=310320110&album_id=238393913

They were def great value for money

 

[pinkmummy]

Thanks hun

These are the ones I've got, ordered them on Tuesday

https://cgi.ebay.co.uk/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=360181784312&ssPageName=STRK:MEWNX:IT