am i the only one?

[MH53ADwife]

so am i the only one who doesnt like children but still wants one? maybe its because ive shut myself off, maybe its because i really dont like children. i dont know, but i cant stand my niece and nephews, or my friends kids. im more tolerant of friends kids but i dont care much for them. i dont want to see them get hurt or be sad, but thats about as far as it goes, i just look at them as small adults. i have this problem where i address children like theyre adults, and i dont really engage with them unless they speak to me first.

youre probably all asking "then why the HELL does she want a kid?!". the only reason i can say is that i want to achieve that higher level of womanhood i suppose, and reach a higher level in my marriage. i feel like im incomplete. like im not my whole self. i want a piece of my husband with me all the time. youre probably also wondering whether id be a good mother by what im saying. i can only compare it to the fact that i love my pets like no other and treat them like theyre my world, but in the same sense, i dont really act that way toward other peoples pets.

i really think i just hate parents. probably because im jealous. anyone else feel this way?

now that i read it back to myself i feel like a weirdo...

 

[missy123]

Its completely different when the child is urs x

 

[2have4kids]

I think the fact that you love your pets is a good indicator that you'll love your children. I can totally relate you you with wanting to see half of you/OH running around, I'm thoroughly attracted to my husband, those tall, green eyes...dark hair will look gorgeous in a little sprog lol. And thank god he's slim, hopefully my kids will have an easier time maintaining a slim figure. I agree with the above poster, once their yours, you'll feel differently and you'll probably be better at relating to other children too.

 

[justhoping]

I agree with all said above, expecially once yours it makes all the difference in the world

 

[jessandaj]

I deffenitly think im in the same boat. I don't do it as much with my nieces and nephews but still i do at time. Mostly its peoples kids in the store if there screaming or crying or whining im like jeez what a flippin annoying little brat. Then i think its normal for kids to cry chill out. I know its because im jealous of there parents. Im always pointing out mistakes parents make with there kids like some kind of child expert and being critical.

 

[nobump]

Ma brother looks at me and says that I am not maternal. My hubby on the other hand is great with kids. Little brother has 3 to two ex wifes he's in the army love him to bits but we prob spend more time with his kids than him. He's based away from home. Would love kids but a small part of me would agree not the most maternal of people. Sorry rambling but see what your saying x

 

[MH53ADwife]

i think ive just lost my public maternal-ness. even after the years of trying my husband wont interact with any children. he used to love kids. maybe its easier to not like them then always want one..

 

[jessandaj]

I think trying to steer away from liking children is a coping method after trying so long and seeing how easy it is for everyone else

 

[MrsBroodyPant]

Hi.
Im the opposite and am always the one playing with all the children and getting stuck right in but do find myself backing off more lately as ttc is getting harder and more upsetting. I feel that people notice im changing, whereas if i was like u and showed no interest in the first place then no one would think any different.
I totally agree with other posts, that it will be different with your own children. You will be a wonderful mother, dont worry xxxx

 

[MH53ADwife]

well i did used to like kids, im not from a big family and wasnt raised around kids/babies, but i always liked them and loved to hold them, and play with them before we started trying.

 

[tamithomas]

My husband is the one that can relate. He wants kids, but doesn't care for other peoples kids.. he's nice to them don't get me wrong, but as for having that extra bond with them and seeing them as special, unless it's his he doesn't see nor feel it. Perfectly normal. Not everyone is obligated to love and worship kids. I find it over rated.

 

[tawanamood]

I don't care for other peoples children either after a certain age. Newborns and babies (under 2 years old) I'll take care of all day, but once the terrible 2's hit they can stay with their parents.

I agree; it's different when the child is your own.

 

[sugarpi24]

I always feel awkward around children...its like I don't know what to say or do...when it comes to pol's pets I'm like " oh your sooo cute" and sometimes I feel like I'm treating a kid like they are a dog...cuz I say the same thing to them...I want a child so bad...I understnad that its different when the kid is yours...I just hope I'm a good mom and ill be able to interact with my kid without feeling awkward...or not knowing what they want...so your not the only one..

 

[Miss_Awesome]

I think it's totally normal! I also happen to believe it's a coping mechanism. I've caught myself a couple times this year saying, "I'm just going to start hating children." If I ever did, watch, that's when getting pregnant would be easy. Ugh.

My husband is a lot like how you described your situation. He doesn't mind children, but isn't exactly impressed with the things they do or say. Yet, we really want our own children and know that it'd be different with our own.