Anyone doing FET/IVF in Jan 2013 till everyone's BFP (Everyone Welcome)

[Boofle]

Em that's brilliant news yay I've had a busy shift at work but you've just lifted me up again wishing u a speedy recovery and great path report

Baby I had sedation for my 2nd transfer. I had a horrid time first time round but I think a lot had to do with not having a very nice doc carry out the procedure and thinking back I also had a urine infection so having a full bladder was extremely painful for me sedation is risky but this is what I will do next time round because for me it was so much more relaxing.

 

[Boofle]

Em that's brilliant news yay I've had a busy shift at work but you've just lifted me up again wishing u a speedy recovery and great path report

Baby I had sedation for my 2nd transfer. I had a horrid time first time round but I think a lot had to do with not having a very nice doc carry out the procedure and thinking back I also had a urine infection so having a full bladder was extremely painful for me sedation is risky but this is what I will do next time round because for me it was so much more relaxing.

 

[BabyD225]

Em that's brilliant news yay I've had a busy shift at work but you've just lifted me up again wishing u a speedy recovery and great path report

Baby I had sedation for my 2nd transfer. I had a horrid time first time round but I think a lot had to do with not having a very nice doc carry out the procedure and thinking back I also had a urine infection so having a full bladder was extremely painful for me sedation is risky but this is what I will do next time round because for me it was so much more relaxing.

When you say horrid time.. you mean painful? It wasn't just like a Pap Smear or IUI for you? My HSG test was absolutely terribly painful and I'm worried I'll feel cramping like that again...please describe what you felt! So sorry you went through that!

 

[Boofle]

Baby - the actual procedure wasn't painful. Because I had a full bladder I was in a lot of discomfort. I suffer with recurrent bladder infections and thinking back I had an infection that day I'm sure. I was last on the list for transfer and the nurse wouldn't let me go for a wee so by the time I was lay on the bed and she was pushing down with the ultrasound thing I was in agony
When I spoke about this at a later appt one of the other nurses told me that she should of let me have a wee because your kidneys are constantly working and there would of been enough in my bladder for the procedure
The doctor carrying out the transfer was horrible and clearly didn't want to be there so putting it all together it was a very unpleasant experience so by the time it came for my FET I was in a state about it and one of the nurses suggested sedation. It wasn't easy to get the consultant to agree to but I'm glad he did.
I've not had IUI so not sure about that hun

 

[BabyD225]

That sounds just horrible. I'm so sorry that happened.. What a terrible experience.. and they say we're supposed to be relaxed?!

Happy you get sedation for the next one....

 

[LotusBlossom]

BabyD- Don't worry. The ET is not bad at all. My Dr gave me one Valium to take an hour before the transfer and I was loopy and calm the whole time. It was like an iui except they cleaned the area first, which was a little uncomfortable. I wouldn't stress about it. It's a great moment when you get your little embie back where it belongs.

 

[BabyD225]

BabyD- Don't worry. The ET is not bad at all. My Dr gave me one Valium to take an hour before the transfer and I was loopy and calm the whole time. It was like an iui except they cleaned the area first, which was a little uncomfortable. I wouldn't stress about it. It's a great moment when you get your little embie back where it belongs.

I really appreciate that!! thank you!

 

[BabyD225]

BabyD- Don't worry. The ET is not bad at all. My Dr gave me one Valium to take an hour before the transfer and I was loopy and calm the whole time. It was like an iui except they cleaned the area first, which was a little uncomfortable. I wouldn't stress about it. It's a great moment when you get your little embie back where it belongs.

Lotus- Were you sore or uncomfortable after you woke up from the ER?

 

[LotusBlossom]

I had some cramping on one side when I woke up from ER, so they gave me a heating pad and it went away. I never had to take anything for pain after the ER. I know it all seems very overwhelming, but take it one day at a time. It's really not so bad, especially when it ends in a beautiful BFP.

 

[BabyD225]

I had some cramping on one side when I woke up from ER, so they gave me a heating pad and it went away. I never had to take anything for pain after the ER. I know it all seems very overwhelming, but take it one day at a time. It's really not so bad, especially when it ends in a beautiful BFP.

Thank you for everything.. it's so helpful, really.... how are you feeling?

 

[LotusBlossom]

I had some cramping on one side when I woke up from ER, so they gave me a heating pad and it went away. I never had to take anything for pain after the ER. I know it all seems very overwhelming, but take it one day at a time. It's really not so bad, especially when it ends in a beautiful BFP.

Thank you for everything.. it's so helpful, really.... how are you feeling?

I'm struggling. My husband had to leave the morning after we found out I will miscarry, so I've been alone. One moment I think I can rationally understand why this happened (maybe a chromosomal issue) and the next, I am just inconsolably sad and angry. I had shared the pregnancy news with friends who knew about our IVF cycle and when I told them what is happening, they didn't know what to say. I understand that because I wouldn't know what to say either, but it still sucks. The ones who have offered to hang out all have children, who they would bring along. One asked me yesterday if I wanted to come over and hang out with her and her sick baby. Yeah, no. The next asked if I want to keep our Friday lunch date, but now she intends to bring her sick 4 yr old. Right. Finally, the friend who I am having lunch with today is so busy with her newborn that I am getting lunch for the two of us and she's coming over with her baby. Awesome. I'm not sure why they don't realize how this is not helpful to me. If she's coming over to be with me and try to make me feel better, why do I have to pick up the damn food? To top it off, she is allergic to dogs (not her fault) but we have to eat/hang/talk outside which is fine except that my neighbor is the nosiest woman on the planet who doesn't hide the fact that she listens to my conversations. I can't even talk on the phone inside my house (with windows open, this is Hawaii) because she has responded to questions I've asked to others through my window! I didn't even know she was standing there!

On another note, the Dr said I could have some bacterial infection because I didn't take antibiotics, so the last thing I want to do is be around sick kids when I need to avoid being sick. I guess I'll take the antibiotics this time and take a chance of getting c. diff again.

I'm sorry for rambling. As I was writing I realized how frustrated I am... The only reason I am going along with the plans for lunch today is that otherwise I will spend the whole day on my couch again and that probably isn't the best choice. Now I just have to remember to breathe...and move on with my day.

 

[Sandy83]

Ah lotus I'm so sorry you are going through this. Unless people have had to go through this process I truly believe they have no idea how we feel. They try to understand but do not think at times. My sister is 14 weeks pregnant at the mo and I feel like she is doing everything to rub it in my face. We were at my mams for tea last night and she brought round a car seat that she had been given by a friend so my mam could keep for when she is looking after the baby. I know it's just a little thing and might be me being selfish but I thought of all the times she could have taken it round was when I was there. Plus all I seem to be getting off people we both know are when is it your turn etc. Sorry just venting also.
Lotus hope you feel better soon and the infection heals up. Be strong this afternoon. Thinking of you xxxx

 

[MoBaby]

Lotus: sorry you are struggling It is hard. It took me a while to get over the first MC (months) and I feel like this one I am sad but its been a little easier. Maybe its because of my new job taking my attention or something... BUT when I am around other girls I do get extremely sad! And I found out that one of my friends is due when I was due (well, 2 of my friends!!) and I just want to SCREAM!! My BFF has a NB and I cant even hold him!! I understand all of your frustrations and sadness hang in there girl! It will get better!! Take the time you need though to get through it. Dont feel sorry for rambling! We are all here to listen!!

 

[FirstTry]

Lotus: sorry you are struggling It is hard. It took me a while to get over the first MC (months) and I feel like this one I am sad but its been a little easier. Maybe its because of my new job taking my attention or something... BUT when I am around other girls I do get extremely sad! And I found out that one of my friends is due when I was due (well, 2 of my friends!!) and I just want to SCREAM!! My BFF has a NB and I cant even hold him!! I understand all of your frustrations and sadness hang in there girl! It will get better!! Take the time you need though to get through it. Dont feel sorry for rambling! We are all here to listen!!

The day I had the ultrasound showing an empty sac, my best friend and her 3 kids were visiting and staying with us. I met them for lunch.

At the restaurant, she handed me her 6 month old so she could go to the bathroom and I just lost it. I'm fine being around kids and don't begrudge people for getting pregnant easily (2 of her 3 were "accidents"). But holding the baby was another thing. I just completely broke down in the middle of the restaurant. And had to give the kid back.

About an hour later, after I told them what had happened, her husband asked me if I was ready to hold the baby again. I was and I did.

 

[Mells54]

Lotus, I can totally relate in a lot of ways. I am also a military spouse ( I hate being called a dependent) and it seems that military families are chock full of kids. Most people ask how many kids we have, not if we have any kids. It's almost a given that we should or do have them. That topped with not having family around, worrying about whether you are going to be moving within 6 months, if you will find a job, whether you DH will be home when ER or ET might be, etc. and I don't know about you, but every time we move our new doctor wants to start at the beginning and not where the last dr left off in treatment. Hang in there Hugs to you...

 

[Edamame]

I'm so sorry lotus. I hope things become easier over time. No worries about ranting, everyone needs it sometimes!

Em, that is great news! I hope all your tests come back clear!!

 

[LotusBlossom]

Ah lotus I'm so sorry you are going through this. Unless people have had to go through this process I truly believe they have no idea how we feel. They try to understand but do not think at times. My sister is 14 weeks pregnant at the mo and I feel like she is doing everything to rub it in my face. We were at my mams for tea last night and she brought round a car seat that she had been given by a friend so my mam could keep for when she is looking after the baby. I know it's just a little thing and might be me being selfish but I thought of all the times she could have taken it round was when I was there. Plus all I seem to be getting off people we both know are when is it your turn etc. Sorry just venting also.
Lotus hope you feel better soon and the infection heals up. Be strong this afternoon. Thinking of you xxxx

I'm so sorry your sister isn't more sensitive to your feelings. I was getting the same question from extended family members for a while, but everyone found out about our infertility situation in Sept when I considered adopting a family member's baby. It didn't work out, but telling people that we had been trying for so long finally got them off my back.

Thanks for the support. This group is invaluable. I'm hoping to get some answers next week so we can figure out if it's an infection or blood clotting issue or something else.

 

[LotusBlossom]

The day I had the ultrasound showing an empty sac, my best friend and her 3 kids were visiting and staying with us. I met them for lunch.

At the restaurant, she handed me her 6 month old so she could go to the bathroom and I just lost it. I'm fine being around kids and don't begrudge people for getting pregnant easily (2 of her 3 were "accidents"). But holding the baby was another thing. I just completely broke down in the middle of the restaurant. And had to give the kid back.

About an hour later, after I told them what had happened, her husband asked me if I was ready to hold the baby again. I was and I did.

Wow, that must have been hard. I'm glad you were able to eventually be ok with holding the baby. The day I found out, I was crying for hours, went to the Dr, then cried some more. There is no way I could go to lunch with friends with babies. Today was rough. My friend's baby cried the whole time she was here, so we really couldn't even talk. It was mostly stressful and not really helpful.

Thankfully, the friend I am meeting tomorrow is not bringing her child. It turns out she just has an allergy appt and is taking her back to school. I love her children, I just need space from kids and babies right now.

 

[LotusBlossom]

Lotus, I can totally relate in a lot of ways. I am also a military spouse ( I hate being called a dependent) and it seems that military families are chock full of kids. Most people ask how many kids we have, not if we have any kids. It's almost a given that we should or do have them. That topped with not having family around, worrying about whether you are going to be moving within 6 months, if you will find a job, whether you DH will be home when ER or ET might be, etc. and I don't know about you, but every time we move our new doctor wants to start at the beginning and not where the last dr left off in treatment. Hang in there Hugs to you...

It's so true that military families tend to have lots of children. People always seem surprised that we don't have children. Our current (nosy) neighbor actually told me that another neighbor asked her if we have kids and she told her that our dogs are our children. I found that to be incredibly rude and presumptuous. I never said our dogs are our children. I know some people feel that way about dogs, but we have wanted children all along and the dogs are wonderful, but are NOT a replacement for children. I wanted to punch her, but I just smiled. I met my husband here, so this is my first military move. I'll be changing Drs twice if I get pregnant soon. I'll be with family for a few months in AZ, then moving to VA. It's not ideal, but it's our only option. Thankfully, my Dr here is cool with me leaving earlier in the pregnancy since we have a complicated situation. He said he'll help me find a good Dr in AZ. It's going to be nuts, I just hope I get my baby.

 

[Boofle]

Ah lotus honey I'm so sorry you're going through this. When I had my m/c I was lucky my BFF came over and at the time her kids had gone to stay with their dad for which I was so grateful. I think I'm able to cope better cos only a handful of people know about the IVF, if more people knew I think I'd be breaking down all over the place. This site is great for support but wouldn't it be great if we could all meet up for a good natter (in Hawaii of course ). It took me a while to get over the m/c all I can say is take each day at a time and veg on the sofa but put on the tv to get some distraction. Also I forced myself to visit a work colleague who had a nb and although I was dreading it and built it up in my mind it was actually okay.

Baby - my er was fine and I had no pain from the proceedure afterwards. I was a little bloated still and that was the most discomfort I felt.