Anyone else feeling like a green eyed monster?!?

[HotMessJess84]

I just needed to vent a little. I'm currently in my second cycle ttc baby #1. AF is due next week (not sure what dpo I am) and already two bfns. So today I found out that my sister in law is pregnant. With twins!! She already has an almost 2yr old daughter. My initial reaction was that this is so unfair! I feel like a total bitch for thinking that but honestly I'm so tired of hearing of women who already have children getting pregnant again before I've even had my first. I feel selfish but I want to be a mom already. It's frustrating. I know I haven't been trying long but it feels like I've been waiting forever to start trying and I want it to happen already. I also feel like no one in his family will care when I do get pregnant because she's pregnant (with twins!) And she lives closer to the family, she's in upstate NY and his family lives in NJ-we moved to CA about 6 months ago.

I just feel sad and frustrated. And selfish for not feeling happy for them immediately. Btw my husband is bummed too. Just wanted to see if anyone else feels or has felt this way before?

 

[tiramisu87]

I think everyone feels this way at some point. I feel it all the time.

 

[mangoberry]

I just needed to vent a little. I'm currently in my second cycle ttc baby #1. AF is due next week (not sure what dpo I am) and already two bfns. So today I found out that my sister in law is pregnant. With twins!! She already has an almost 2yr old daughter. My initial reaction was that this is so unfair! I feel like a total bitch for thinking that but honestly I'm so tired of hearing of women who already have children getting pregnant again before I've even had my first. I feel selfish but I want to be a mom already. It's frustrating. I know I haven't been trying long but it feels like I've been waiting forever to start trying and I want it to happen already. I also feel like no one in his family will care when I do get pregnant because she's pregnant (with twins!) And she lives closer to the family, she's in upstate NY and his family lives in NJ-we moved to CA about 6 months ago.

I just feel sad and frustrated. And selfish for not feeling happy for them immediately. Btw my husband is bummed too. Just wanted to see if anyone else feels or has felt this way before?

Ms. HotMessJess84 - don't worry, I feel like that all the time too - it's normal to feel so. It's like you want it so bad that everywhere you start noticing pregnant women - yes they were there before too but now I just notice it much more. I am married since 5 years and in that time I have seen many friends getting pregnant, though I never felt anything till now because I was not trying - now that I have started to try and not only the physical pain of AF but it also takes emotional toll on me, and to top it off I see my other friends getting pregnant before I do.
After all we are human so cheer up! - to make you feel better I just got my AF yesterday after cycle#2 (which was on 16DPO, for me its always 14DPO)

 

[tuesdaysbaby]

Yup I feel this way all the time. I'm in my second cycle of TTC number one too so can totally relate. I am worried about being left behind or not as important but I think people will be really happy when it happens for us! And it will. I'm really positive this month (again) haha.

 

[SarahE]

My sister just had her first in January...my eyes are greener than the Grinch at Christmas!!!! I'm on my 2nd cycle TTC too.

 

[HotMessJess84]

Thanks for responding ladies. It's good to know we're not alone! Fx we all get our bfps sooner rather than later

 

[CrazyCharlie2]

I feel this way all The time. We are in month 5 and my cousin just announced her pregnancy. .. I am happy for them but really a jelly monster at the same time. to you all! 2014 will be our year!

 

[Hopeful in OR]

I feel that way too, grrrrrrrrr. First my co-worker who didn't even want kids got pregnant, then an acquaintance who already has a toddler announced her surprise pregnancy with her brand new boyfriend.

Somehow we have to rise above that and have faith that it will happen for us...Anyone know how? lol

Baby dust to everyone!!

 

[Kaychikan]

2 years in an my 2 best friends and my younger sister all recently pregnant within a month of each other gonna be a long hard summer

 

[tracilacy]

yea i feel you! egh its starting to get bad for me tho im in my first month of ttc but been ntnp for a year and im get made when i see cute lil pregnant women walking with their toddlers or other kids and im just buying ANOTHER gift for a baby shower lol its torture its like im happy for you but i hate you now go away lol

well hopefully we all will be those woman we're jelly of soon!!!

 

[NicoleRenae84]

I can completely relate! I feel like everyone around me is getting pregnant an I want to be happy for them, but at the same time I'm so jealous! I had a miscarriage in October last year and was (still am) completely devastated. Since then I've been charting like crazy and my husband and I are TTC and yet nothing happens. It is very frustrating! Especially when so many women say they weren't even trying, "it just happened". Hang in there, you are not alone!

 

[sweetcee]

I'm right with you. I've wanted to have a baby for two years, but DH wasn't ready until recently. My cousin, who is younger than I am, is due with her 2nd baby this month. The whole family is making a huge deal and I feel like a bitch for being so jealous. It is only my 2nd cycle trying, but it sucks!

 

[tuesdaysbaby]

I'm right with you. I've wanted to have a baby for two years, but DH wasn't ready until recently. My cousin, who is younger than I am, is due with her 2nd baby this month. The whole family is making a huge deal and I feel like a bitch for being so jealous. It is only my 2nd cycle trying, but it sucks!

Don't feel like a bitch, because if you are one, so am I! I went to a big two day event on the weekend and the people in front of us, two couples, were talking about babies... anyway one of the women is newly pregnant and I was so utterly jealous. This weekend was meant to be when I found out we were pregnant as I was due to test on the 16th, but AF got me super early... I was happy for her, inasmuch as I have no idea who she is, but jealous and it felt so odd.
I know that sounds really strange but I was jealous of a woman I had not met. But I'm jealous of that excitement, that happiness, that feeling of getting to tell your DH that you are pregnant and your family's happiness for you.. right now I don't have that and I want it so badly.

PS I'm on cycle 2 as well. I've waited four years to TTC!

 

[dontworry]

This happens to us all. When you see people get what you've always dreamed of having, of course we're gonna get a little jealous. I've broken down into tears on the phone when someone has told me they were pregnant, I have cried holding newborns. I had to leave the room where my cousin was having her baby (while I was acting as a DOULA!) because she was looking me in the eye and telling me "You don't want this! You don't want to have a baby, it's awful!" (because of course she was in labor and trying push a watermelon out of her vagina). I have seen so many of my friends and loved ones get the news that they were pregnant and I'm just here, baby-less, and sad lol. Of course I am happy for them, on some level, but I am also madly jealous.

 

[BeachyFeelin]

Oh yes I feel you. My sister had twins (by IVF though) who are about to turn 8 and my mom has been dying for more babies around. My cousin announced that her and her DH are expecting this summer and I'm soooo happy for them but now her and my sister bond over it and it's making me sad. My sister and I are 6 years apart so we didn't start to get close until the last 10 years, but I was hoping to bond with her over pregnancy first I don't know...just super jealous about that.

My close friends are also expecting twins (after NTNP) in the summer and already have a 2 year old DS. It just seems like every week on Facebook I see someone announcing their 2nd pregnancy and I just would do ANYTHING to have #1!!

I used to say I wanted a girl....but now I really don't care about gender and just want a healthy baby of our own

 

[HotMessJess84]

I think I'm out and will be moving I to cycle 3 soon. Getting that bfn never gets easier Still trying not too think too much about my pregnant sister in law cause it really gets me down. Glad we have this thread to vent about it!