Anyone else only waiting because their OH wants to? disagree on TTC date...advice pleaseeee

[Stargazing]

I have been ready for many years. I've personally been WWT for 9 years now. However, my OH only recently started thinking about kids realistically because he met me and I want them (so I understand that he hasn't had much adjusting time compared to me).

He wants to start TTC in 4 months (January). I agreed.

However.... honestly... i'm just over it. I'm completely over waiting (because for me it's been a very long road). I want to start now and i don't agree that we have any good reason to wait. We are very secure in every way- financially, relationship-wise etc etc.

I know he's being reasonable. I know it's not his fault. But i'm beginning to feel a lot of anger building in myself (not directed at him- but at the situation).

I also have PCOS and often don't ovulate- so that's a worry at the back of my head. Feeling like it will be a long process any so whats the point in waiting longer?

I know i'm being irrational but can't help it. A baby is all i've ever wanted, and 4 months feels like forever for someone who has waited 9 years. Can anyone offer me any advice or support?

Sorry for the rant. thanks for reading.

 

[Jules8]

Waiting is so hard! I have PCOS so I get your concerns. There are things you can do to prepare your body for January. If your on BC come off and use other ways of protection. Track your cycles and see if you can chart ovulation or get a feel for how often you ovulate. I also suggest temping, that’s helpful to confirm ovulation. Have an OB check up and have them check up on hormones levels. Take vitamins. That way you feel like your making progress towards that time and it makes it feel a bit more real.

 

[Stargazing]

Waiting is so hard! I have PCOS so I get your concerns. There are things you can do to prepare your body for January. If your on BC come off and use other ways of protection. Track your cycles and see if you can chart ovulation or get a feel for how often you ovulate. I also suggest temping, that’s helpful to confirm ovulation. Have an OB check up and have them check up on hormones levels. Take vitamins. That way you feel like your making progress towards that time and it makes it feel a bit more real.

Thank you so much for replying, I didn't think anyone would! that's great advice, however, i've already done all of the above. I wish he would change his mind, but I also want to respect his wants and feelings.

You are so lucky you have 3!! if you have any advice on regulating periods then please let me know- I extremely health conscious and lean, however my period is all over the place (and sometimes stops)/

I wonder if there is a PCOS support thread...

 

[Jules8]

I conceived my first 2 via femara. I have 3 great doctors who helped me along the way. My OB who did all my bloodwork and finally listened when I said something was wrong. My other OB literally told me I was stupid and young, because I was concerned about not having periods. He told me my hormones were just imbalanced and put me on BC then when it happened on BC he blamed it on the BC. When I started TTC I began charting and it never confirmed ovulation. She listened and knew almost right away I probably had PCOS. I waited no time when it was confirmed and found a fertility specialist who prescribed femara and did a monitored cycle, I was pregnant that month. When we decided to have a second I talked to my OB and she prescribed femara so I didn’t have to go the fertility doctor route. I didn’t do monitored cycles for that. They just tested me when I got a positive ovulation test to confirm ovulation. I didn’t ovulate the first few months then they upped it and it worked. This time around was a complete surprise. God had a hand in it because I didn’t want to do fertility treatments again. I hadn’t had a period in months so I wasn’t expecting it’s all.

I also have a doctor who specializes in PCOS. He helped me understand it so much more. If the unmonitored cycles didn’t work with my second he was going to do one for me and code it as PCOS observation so I didn’t have to pay. My insurance would allow that for one cycle. After I’m done with babies and breastfeeding I’ll go to him for my long term PCOS treatment plan.

 

[Stargazing]

I conceived my first 2 via femara. I have 3 great doctors who helped me along the way. My OB who did all my bloodwork and finally listened when I said something was wrong. My other OB literally told me I was stupid and young, because I was concerned about not having periods. He told me my hormones were just imbalanced and put me on BC then when it happened on BC he blamed it on the BC. When I started TTC I began charting and it never confirmed ovulation. She listened and knew almost right away I probably had PCOS. I waited no time when it was confirmed and found a fertility specialist who prescribed femara and did a monitored cycle, I was pregnant that month. When we decided to have a second I talked to my OB and she prescribed femara so I didn’t have to go the fertility doctor route. I didn’t do monitored cycles for that. They just tested me when I got a positive ovulation test to confirm ovulation. I didn’t ovulate the first few months then they upped it and it worked. This time around was a complete surprise. God had a hand in it because I didn’t want to do fertility treatments again. I hadn’t had a period in months so I wasn’t expecting it’s all.

I also have a doctor who specialises in PCOS. He helped me understand it so much more. If the unmonitored cycles didn’t work with my second he was going to do one for me and code it as PCOS observation so I didn’t have to pay. My insurance would allow that for one cycle. After I’m done with babies and breastfeeding I’ll go to him for my long term PCOS treatment plan.

Thats such helpful, amazing information. Thank you!! my gynaecologist just said "you will probably have issues conceiving, if you don't conceive within 6 months, come to me and I will prescribe you fertility medication" I guessed she meant clomid.

Question..... I believe even when I get my period I'm not ovulating... I have tried to get pregnant previously (though only for about 6 months) and it didn't happen. Can you still get your period even though you never ovulated? google is giving me conflicting advice on this one.

**I sometimes do get a POSITIVE OPK, but i've been told with PCOS this isn't very accurate

I'm still wondering whether or not I simply ask him to start now.. but i don't think he will be onboard.

 

[Jules8]

Yes, it’s possible to have a period without ovulation. Your lining can still be thick and your hormones can surge enough for your body to think you ovulated even when you didn’t.

I mean, I would say you’ve been trying for a while and know through tracking that ovulation may not be happening when you guys do start trying in January. If you track your period and they are longer cycles then that should be an indicator to them. Some use clomid and some use femara. Mine suggested femara and it worked. I should mention that I saw an endocrinologist as well, they’re the ones who officially diagnosed my PCOS and referred me to a fertility doctor. I only did a medicated monitored cycle with them for the first month. My insurance didn’t cover much and for everything it was $600 that I paid in payments in payments. It was worth it because I was pregnant that month. Some insurances will pay for it so you could check into it. OB’s are t actually as educated in PCOS as you think. It’s actually caused by the pancreas so an endocrinologist or a fertility endocrinologist(that’s what kind I see) are more helpful.