Anyone in the early days and planning an unmedicated birth?

[Guppy051708]

Hi there, i am due Feb 22 with my second child. I had my first via unmedicated waterbirth at 41 weeks & 5 days, so i def. intend on having another unmedicated! I was looking for some natural birthers to be my buddy. I only have a couple BnB friends that believe in a natural birth, so i would love some that do believe in it as well (someone that understands)Thanks!

 

[Nikki_d72]

Hiya, plenty of ladies here that beleive in natural birth. I'm due a couple of months before you, in December but am happy to chat anyhoo! Do you have to really fight for unmedicated birth where you are? I've read some shocking things about the US system on here.

 

[Nikki_d72]

Hey Guppy, just saw your post in OBEM USA thread so you don't need to answer that! Good on you, love that you chundered on the arsey MW!!

 

[MermaidMom]

i think i often use the thanks button as the like button on facebook

anyway... im a natural momma just starting out on this pregnancy also!! we're due feb 19th and will have an unmedicated birth. this is our first child, second pregnancy (i feel so weird saying that, as if the first wasnt a child!) but you know what i mean... this will be the first one that we'll have the product of all our hard work at the end of it.

 

[Guppy051708]

Thanks girls! I look forward to our journeys together. Do either of you have a journal on BnB that i can follow?

@ MermaidMom, are you in the February Valentines group? If youre not, you should join
https://www.babyandbump.com/pregnancy-groups/621266-february-valentines-2012-join-us-here.html

And yes, i totally understand what you mean about all of your babies, even if one is in a different place. We MCed are first baby. And i feel uncomfortable saying i only have 1 when in fact i actually have 3 (one in heaven, one on earth, and one baking).


I really did have to fight the system to have an umedicated birth (this country is so twisted ) but my largest problem was the seperation. Off to the nursery he went within 15 min after delivery. The nurses were rude and when i wanted to BF him, they let me do it for 5 min and then "times up". I only got to hold him twice between the time he was born and about 24 hours later i will never get over what they did with seperation, especially given there was no real reason for it (they wanted to "monitor" him ) and i just dont want that to happen again, so we are going to a free standing birth center this time. I am through with the hospital (unless of course in an emergency). I would love to do a HB but my insurance refuses to cover it *sigh* So FSBC it is!

 

[Nikki_d72]

Aw, Guppy, that's awful, especially for no good reason. Here's to an even more empowering birth this time for you, can you put it in your birth plan that you in no way want to be separated from your baby, except in real medical emergency? Hopefully the birth centre will be much more baby-friendly in their practices anyway.

Sorry i don't have a pregnancy journal, if I start one then even less housework will get done and I may be divorced by the time I have this baby, hehe I spend waaay too much time on here and online generally, researching, researching. if I don't get my butt off the chair all my researching will be to no avail as I'll be too unfit to birth this baby...

 

[MermaidMom]

that is terrible im so glad youre seeking a better birth and first hours/days experience this time around. how can anyone treat people like that?? the standard system seriously just boggles my mind. how can they think that is bet for newborn babies? they need to be with their mothers!

 

[lesbianlove]

here in he uk they do rooming in, and only seperate mothers from babies if theres something seriously wrong with baby and they need special care, we dont have nurseries in our hospitals, and natural birthing and breastfeeding is highly recomended which im deffo glad for cos u get the support u need, im down for a homebirth with this one woo just having monitoring to make sure babys weight is ok x

 

[MermaidMom]

sounds like the UK is way ahead of the US... you're generally looked at like youre crazy if you dont want an epidural, want to breastfeed right after birth, dont want to cut the cord right after birth, want to room in with your child, etc.

 

[irish_cob]

sounds like the UK is way ahead of the US... you're generally looked at like youre crazy if you dont want an epidural, want to breastfeed right after birth, dont want to cut the cord right after birth, want to room in with your child, etc.

Yeah like it's such an inconvenience that a mother might actually want to be with her baby and bond with her and breastfeed her Like baby is an inconvenience and should be shipped off somewhere so the mother can reapply her lipgloss and look gorgeous for the post-birth photos. How bizarre! I'm so glad I'm in the UK, don't get me wrong, it's not all plain sailing here, but in the USA it's a million times worse.

 

[MermaidMom]

well we do have options here too, its just not so common. im planning on a birth with a midwife at a birth center within a hospital. my sister is a midwife but lives far away, but if necessary i know she'd fly out and fight for me so my hubby and i can relax with our baby

 

[L Elise]

Hiya - we're due Nov. OH is still a little wobbley on the whole natural thang, but I think I'm getting there!

I have my 'fighting' to do before the big day - come the big day all the fighting will be done by OH. He know's which side his bread is buttered on! :wink:

 

[Guppy051708]

Hi L Elise! :wave: welcome!

Well when i did give birth to my son it actually was in a birth center, in the hospital...dont let the name fool you its basically the same as any other L&D. Part of the reason why i am so pissed at the hospital is because they are a recognized WHO hospital, the fully encourage BFing and rooming in. When we went to our tour of it they said they hardley ever take babies to the nursery. So i feel very lied to...They claimed it was because his respiration was so high. Every time i would talk to him or hold his hand it would go back down to normal. Its like no wonder its high! he is scared and there are bright lights and his mother is no where in sight! Since then i have learned that Kangaroo care is best for baby-not monitoring. It just has me scarred for life...i will never get that time back so this time i wont let that happen (unless in the case of a REAL issue). I really feel like they took advantage of the fact that my birth was 30 hours long and i was dead tired. In my normal state i would have fought that to the core, but being so tired and drained it never really crossed my mind...makes me feel guilty....i should not be feeling guilty over something THEY did to ME.

 

[indigo_fairy]

The very thought of the nurseries where the babies are all separated from mum straight after birth give me chills. Surely these days it's widely known of the importance of bonding and BF'ing if you want to, in those first few hours straight after birth? You were in a vulnerable position and shouldn't feel guilty for what happened I still feel guilt over my daughters birth, but have realised, not accepted but at least acknowledged that I can't change it and only make the next birth different

 

[Guppy051708]

So true! ANd thats exactly what im doing...getting the hell out of the hospital lol

 

[L Elise]

That sucks, Guppy! Was there no one there that had your back? Take a gun slinger in with you next time, chick. It's a shame there's a fight to be had - but it's gonna be tougher without a battle buddy!

My (poor) OH will have to be on his game that day - or he'll find himself on the subs bench! And he knows it!

 

[Guppy051708]

Well my mom and my DH were there, but my mom and DH stayed awake with my throughout my entire 30 hour labor...which was long and hard...so they were in a similar sleep deprivation as I was. Otherwise im sure they would have said something. Well, and DH just did not realize it either. Neither one of us had ever been in a hospital giving birth, so even though we KNEW we didn't want seperation, it just sort of happened, even though we didn't want it to and realized it more after the fact...well during but i felt as if we had no voice.

 

[MermaidMom]

dont be feeling guilty.... its pretty sad what the 'norm' is. are you going to have a doula this time who can stand up for you? it shouldnt even be your job to fight with hospital staff. birth and right after your baby is born should be stress free and amazing.

 

[Guppy051708]

I am actually a DONA certified doula BUT i dont believe i could ever "doula" myself! that would be quite the challenge! I really really really wanted to hire a doula this time, i really do, but we just dont have the cash i know they are willing to do pay scales, but we have no flexibility in our finances at all it totally sucks.

 

[Guppy051708]

Since DH and i both know what to expect this time around (that was our biggest thing with the way things went down) then I think things will go much differently. Plus, as long as i dont get rushed off to the hospital from the birth center (its freestanding), then i wont have that problem anyways

Are you going to get a doula?