Anyone struggle with bf 1st time but managed with next baby?

[sezzolou]

I was determined to bf lo. I tried so hard but I never figured out why I didn't/couldn't succeed. From the very first time I tried he would latch on but then pull away and really cry after only a few seconds. I tried for about a month every day. In the end I expressed and gave him first via a syringe when he was tiny then moved onto a bottle when I finally accepted it wasn't going to happen. I had the support of the breast feeding group who came every few days and I tried all sorts but nothing helped. In the end It got far to distressing for me and lo to keep trying. At around 2 mo lo was diagnosed with silent reflux and is still on meds at nearly 1 year old but I'm not sure if this is anything to do with my failure at breast feeding.

I'm now pregnant with no2 and would love to try breast feeding again. Has anyone struggled first time round but managed with subsequent babies? Has anyone had a baby that would latch no problem but then pull away after only a few seconds? I didn't really get any answers as to why it went wrong.

 

[daddiesgift]

Breastfeeding is the hardest thing I've ever done in my life! I wasn't very successful with #1 or #2. This time I've given myself no choice but to continue. She's only 16 days old so I can't tell you I was successful this time but I can say it's going much better and I have no plans to stop! Educating yourself and finding support is a huge help.

I don't know why your LO kept pulling off but keep in mind that every baby and bfing experience is different. It may not have worked with #1 but that doesn't mean it won't with #2! Good luck

 

[Pielette]

I didn't have that issue with either of my LOs, but I have succeeded in BFing my youngest when I gave up at about three weeks first time round. I just had no clue what was normal first time round and found myself completely unprepared.

Second time round I desperately wanted to breastfeed, and we have nearly reached 1 year I think I owe that to all my reading on here and perseverance. One feed at a time. After a while I stopped finding it something to endure and began to enjoy it. One of the best things I have ever done.

 

[pLadyBug]

My first was a bit of a challenge he too had reflux. Back then I didn't know much about BFing or reflux and didn't have anyone to help. He was nursed for about 3mths then placed on a special formula. The following babies were much easier though. It's just a matter of trial and error mixed with education. Having a support group or a BFing counselor to guide you is very important on successful BFing. Do know that every baby is different and they all latch differently. The first 3wks are no walk in the park even for the pros, your body has to get used to it.

As for the why your baby pulled away and started to cry... It sounds like a bad latch or positioning problem to me. Babies tend to get very frustrated if the amount they're looking for is not supplied right away. They will try and if not fast enough they will pull away. Likewise your position can throw everything off even if things appear to be right. If there appears to be a problem try sitting straight up in a chair, feet flat and bring the baby to you. Some women unknowingly tilt their bodies toward the baby's mouth and that is incorrect. You bring the baby to you.

 

[Sarah lo]

Apart from the reflux I totally could have written your post myself.

I struggled on for 4 agonising months trying to feed DD. She did exactly the same thing yours did -latch on, suck, pull off, cry again and again. Sometimes she did it for hours on end till eventually she would be full and fall asleep.

It was so frustrating, and even more so because nobody anywhere (and i mean i tried asking for help EVERYWHERE I possibly could) could suggest anything that it might be or what could make it better. I began supplementing with formula and at 4 months I finally admitted defeat before I went completely off my rocker.

I think it makes it really hard to move on when you don't know why it went wrong last time. I was reluctant to even try BF this time but I'm so glad I did because it led me to finally find out what the problem was with DD - posterior tongue tie. DS had all the same symptoms but this time the breastfeeding advisor at my clinic spotted it. So now I'm successfully breastfeeding my son and also have had the closure I so desperately needed as to why it all went wrong last time.

 

[Mimzy3]

Apart from the reflux I totally could have written your post myself.

I struggled on for 4 agonising months trying to feed DD. She did exactly the same thing yours did -latch on, suck, pull off, cry again and again. Sometimes she did it for hours on end till eventually she would be full and fall asleep.

It was so frustrating, and even more so because nobody anywhere (and i mean i tried asking for help EVERYWHERE I possibly could) could suggest anything that it might be or what could make it better. I began supplementing with formula and at 4 months I finally admitted defeat before I went completely off my rocker.

I think it makes it really hard to move on when you don't know why it went wrong last time. I was reluctant to even try BF this time but I'm so glad I did because it led me to finally find out what the problem was with DD - posterior tongue tie. DS had all the same symptoms but this time the breastfeeding advisor at my clinic spotted it. So now I'm successfully breastfeeding my son and also have had the closure I so desperately needed as to why it all went wrong last time.

I found out my son was tongue tied late in the game too. He did the same thing you were describing! We clipped his tongue but by then he was already used to bottles and never learned to latch correctly. I ended up exclusively pumping and still am at almost 9 months. Its sooooo exhausting I really hope the next time around I'll be able to breast feed from the breast directly.

 

[leigh5tom]

My first was totally uninterested in the breast. She wouldn't open her mouth, or root or anything. Totally not interested. For 10 days I desperately tried to feed her (with her screaming out of hunger!!) but by 3 weeks she was completely onto formula. My nipples after ten days were absolutely ruined, they were chewed to smithereens and bleeding. Horrible

With my second I educated myself more about breastfeeding & read up on here a lot about newborn cluster feeds, growth spurts, comfort sucking, building supply etc and I felt much more informed. He had a tongue tie which was divided at 5 days old & after a rocky first 6 weeks we are now at 15 weeks and going strong good luck to you xxxx

 

[sezzolou]

Thanks for all the replies. It is reassuring to read your comments. I am definately going to learn more about breast feeding this time. Alot of my time and energy was spent on planning my home birth last time which went absolutely to plan. Being abit nieve I just assumed breastfeeding would come naturally...I was soooo wrong!