arguing over knowing the sex or not???

[tulip2002]

Ok so our "20" week scan is next week and i have said from the start that this time i want a surprise and as it will be our last and Aldready have boy n girl anyway so am not to fussed about what it is although I would maybe like a girl but dont mind. On the otherhand my partner has been having a paddy and wants to know what it is and doesnt want to wait and find out and says im being silly waiting when we could prepare in advance and get everything we need ahead. Now i dont know what to do. Do i just find out and have over and done with or go into that scan room and come home with him all moody and sulky which i know he will haha. We found out last time at scans with previous kids. What would u do.

 

[LoraLoo]

Let him sulk- you're the one carrying the baby, it's your decision.

Our third baby was also a surprise after a girl and boy and I really loved it- hubby was like yours and wanted to find out, but finding out at the birth was amazing.

 

[kksy9b]

I'm the opposite from you. I really wanted to find out but hubby wanted to wait. Since we found out with our DS and this is likely our last baby (so last opportunity to do it), I said it was fine to wait this time. That way we each "get our way" with a baby. Is this your last? If so, maybe stress how important it is to you since there won't be another chance? And in the end, the tech will listen to you so just say from the beginning you Dont want to know and they should honor that.

 

[Moom7900]

It seems a bit unfair to pull rank - could you ask that the sonographer writes the sex down for your husband so he can know but you don't find out? As long as he can keep a secret lol.
I didn't find out with my first but have with every other since, I don't like unisex clothes and prams and love that baby has a name before they are born.
Neither of you should be forced to go with what you don't want, you should have a surprise if you want it and he should be able to know the gender. Unless one of you is willing to back down, the only fair way is for you to both get what you want.
Good luck xxxxxx

 

[SleepyBaby]

Do what you want!

I'd hate for my ex to know the sex and me not to, what if he spilled to other people then they would know your babys sex before you as well?

You can be prepared for baby without knowing the gender! they where doing it for a long long time before scans where invented!

Talk to your partner and tell him you dont want to find out, it should be a joint decision i agree but that doesnt mean letting him nag you into finding out!

 

[rosegarden620]

Wait!
Baby four on board over here and I've wanted to be team yellow since baby no. 3. DH was against it last time so, I let him have his wish. This
Time, it's our last and I was sure to let him know that it's MY turn to get what I want. He didn't fight me to much on it but he definitely originally wanted to know. Now, at 24/25 weeks he's totally on board with being team yellow and is actually adamant about it. I love the waiting game! It's like waiting for santa on Christmas morning!!

Can't wait.

 

[bcos21]

If this is your last id absolutely wait if that's what you want. We found out with our first. (Husband found out and couldn't keep a secret) so this time we are doing it my way, team yellow. If you making decisions about your health information is considered "pulling rank " then may our husbands feel free to take their turns during labor LOL. He will get over it, my husband has actually become really excited about the surprise. Honestly, having already had 2 kids, one of each sex, what is it you need to prepare in advance? I washed a few yellow and white newborn outfits I had, and we bought 2 inexpensive coming home outfits and I saved the receipt so we can take one back. No problem. Good luck!

 

[tommyg]

He will find out soon enough at the birth. Tell him to have some patience. Few true surprises in life.
I imagine you have bundles of both girl and boy clothes. What you could do sort out your clothes, neutral, girls and boys so that it is easy to charity shop / sell the bundle of stuff that you don't need.

If you are thinking about bedrooms then assuming your other two are both still quite young get them to share until baby is sleeping better then juggle rooms. So the two of same gender get the bigger room, when baby is coming out of the cot.

 

[Jennifurball]

Try not to stress about it. Baby might not even be in a good position to see the gender on the day, or you may decide on the day you would like to know. Or you may not.

But your husband should respect your wishes. You are carrying the baby and as said before, what if he spills the news and someone down the road knows the sex before you.

 

[tommyg]

There is no point in him knowing and you not knowing. His argument for knowing is to prepare in advance any prep he does will give the game away.

Remind him that the scan is for medical reasons and to check baby is ok. Girl or boy is irrelevant if baby has a health problem.

 

[Clever.Name]

I could have written this post myself! We are in the exact same position - baby #3, already have one of each. I don't want to know, and he wants to know. We have two weeks to argue about it, but I just want it to be different this time, and since I really don't care either way, why not have a surprise? He says he'll find out and then tell my oldest and keep it a secret - yeah right, 5 year olds are really good at keeping secrets! I don't want him to know if I'm not going to find out as I know he'll somehow manage to spill the beans........

 

[kimmy04]

I'm in the same boat but opposite haha. It's our 3rd, also have 1 of each. We found out with the first 2 and hubby wants a surprise this time and I don't. I don't like surprises. I like planning. I also want to do a gender reveal this time since our scan is 2 days before our daughters birthday party I thought it would be fun to have her open something revealing the sex while all our family is here. I told him I'm carrying the baby Soni get to decide. I did offer to just keep it a secret for myself and not tell anyone but he said he wants to know if I know.