arrrggghhh FOB RANT - Am I wrong???

[jessrabbit]

got very frustrated with FOB this weekend.

I have only seen him once in nearly three months and just want to get to know him if he is going to be a part of our lives.

I was annoyed that he had time off work at the weekend (the only time that I have time off) and instead of making the time to get to know me, he decided to spend it with his new girlfriend. I dont have an issue with him spending it with her, but wonder when he thinks he is going to get to know me.

I think its important as otherwise why would I want a stranger at the birth, or a stranger looking after baby?

His reaction to me being annoyed was to accuse me of picking a fight with him, because I want his attention!!!!!!!!

I would rather never see him again in my whole life, but keep trying to make the effort for blobs sake. I can do this on my own financially, its going to be tight but I will find a way. So from my point of view him being involved is to be a dad.

Kind of coming to the conclusion that I cant make him be involved for want to be involved, which just makes me sad and really angry with him.

Wish I had a crystal ball and could see into the future to know whether or not to keep trying with him.

 

[AbbynChloe]

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

I'm sorry my hun!! I don't know what to say??

it is not your responsibility to involve him in babies life - thats all on him - you've given him the information he needs, therefore he needs to be coming to you.

I chased Chloe's FOB and to be perfectly honest I wish I hadn't. The sheer stress was not worth it, for my mental and physical health, not worth it at all!!

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

 

[jessrabbit]

I think I am coming round to your way of thinking.

Not spoken to him since Saturday and not going to unless he makes the effort from now on. Its not up to me to make him be involved, if he wants to be involved he will have to prove it to me, with actions instead of meaningless words.

Going to work on the assumption I'm on my own from now on, that way i cant be let down

 

[whoops]

I've learned the hard way that you can't force someone to be a dad.

Once you make it clear to him that you won't stand in his way, the rest is up to him.

 

[jessrabbit]

thanks. he knows he can be involved, so just going to leave it up to him now. His choice if he wants to miss out x

 

[mskellydenise]

Don't waste your time...move on with life assuming he wont be there for your LO...if he has a new gf she could have something to do with it...she might be uncomfortable with you wanting him to take time to get to know you...if after the baby is born he steps up thats great but dont expect his help or attention before then