at what age

[motherofboys]

do you allow your children to start going out alone?
mine are still quite young, the eldest is only 6, will be 7 in Feb. but a lot of his friends who are 7 take themselves to school go to the village shop by themselves or ride their bikes to friends houses. we live in a tiny village where it takes less than 10 minutes to walk from one end to the other and only had 1 main road through it. I feel it lulls people in to a false sense of security. but now my son is asking "when I am 7 can I go to my friends houses by myself" "can I ride my bike all the way to school and meet you there" (I have to still go to take his brother who is 5 to school) and then he asks "if I look after him would zac be able to come with me, cos he will be almost 6 by the summer" I had tried to delay answering by saying I would see how I felt about it and how sensible he was when out by the summer.
I don't know if I am over protective or not. DH thinks he should be able to because he could at that age, but to be his still so young.

 

[1sdrfa]

I live in a housing estate and we let our 5 year old out 2 play there by herself but the only reason is we all look out for each others kids we keep an eye out when they are outside ours and the same for the other parents. I no I don't have 2 deal with her wanting 2 go further yet don't know how I will deal with that one! Do u have others that would look out for your boys when they are out and about would put your mind at ease then u would be able 2 c how wise he is round with his friends then decide how much freedom he gets from there. I dunno if that helps u any but that's how we are working it at the min don't have 2 deal with s much as u but hope u come up with something that suits your family and where u live!

 

[1sdrfa]

I live in a housing estate and we let our 5 year old out 2 play there by herself but the only reason is we all look out for each others kids we keep an eye out when they are outside ours and the same for the other parents. I no I don't have 2 deal with her wanting 2 go further yet don't know how I will deal with that one! Do u have others that would look out for your boys when they are out and about would put your mind at ease then u would be able 2 c how wise he is round with his friends then decide how much freedom he gets from there. I dunno if that helps u any but that's how we are working it at the min don't have 2 deal with s much as u but hope u come up with something that suits your family and where u live!

 

[motherofboys]

there isn't anywhere they can play that we can see from the house. we know quite a lot of people in the village because it is so tiny. they would mainly be going to the shop, which my niece works in, knocking for friends and playing on 'the green' or in the various closes out side their friends houses.
in all honesty my 5 year old probably has more common sense, my 6year old is easily led. my main worry is that they would get excited and cross the road at an unsafe point where they can't see properly, or that they would get snatched because let's face it you never really know anyone do you. I lived in a flat when I was their age and we had a large paved square or front where we played with the other kids from the block.

 

[RachA]

I would imagine it'd be harder for you as you do live in a small village etc but i definitely wouldn't allow mine to be going anywhere on their own at 7. I don't really think it's safe enough for them to be out on their own at the age. TBH i would have a hard job of letting them walk anywhere on their own before they leave primary school. My sister has been really sick recently and she hasn't been able to take her 10 (11 in 3 weeks) year old to school. In theory she is able to walk to school on her own as year 5 and 6 are allowed to but my sister isn't happy with this so i have been taking her. Because i have my own two to get ready in the morning my niece has walked around to my house (literally about 2 mins) but her sister has crossed her over the main road as it's just too dangerous to do on her own.

 

[marley2580]

Honestly, I think at 7 I'd be letting them go to their friends houses on the condition that they phone once they get there. My 2 older ones (5 and 3.5) play out the front by themselves, though they stay where I can see them atm. If he's really feeling like he needs that independence are there things you can put in place to reduce any risk - eg phoning when arriving at friend's house?

 

[alicecooper]

My 5 and 7 year olds are allowed to play out on the street outside our house. 7 year old is allowed round the corner as well as long as she stays within the estate (which only comprises of 2 streets - ours plus one more).

Our 3 year old is only allowed on our front garden though, or on the field directly opposite our house.

Just for clarification :

Jason is ON the field here, and the house up behind him with the open door is our house. So not far at all

 

[motherofboys]

I wish our house didn't just have like a 2foot wide path then bam main road out front so he could play out there.
I was thinking of letting them go ahead on their scooters to school, I would follow up. usually I make them wait at certain points if they get ahead of me, all points with in sight, then when I reach them they can go to the next one. on the walk to school there are about half of each of their classes crossing to road around the same time as us anyway. but it would be a step forward.
I also thought on the days I know my niece is working on the shop letting him go up there so I can check when his arrived and set of home again.
I have even considered giving him one of our old phones that he would only be allowed when he went out, so if he went to one friends house and they said let's go knock for so and so he could let me know he was going somewhere else.

 

[marley2580]

I don't know any parent that wouldn't let a kid use the home phone to call their parents when supposed to. You have to find what works for you as a family. It's not an easy balance to find between fostering independence and self-sufficency on one hand and keeping them safe on the other.

 

[mandy81]

Sophie Lou has been walking to school with her friends from she was 8 ( schools about a 10 minute walk away). She has been out playing with her friends from the age of 6-7.

Dylan has only just got to go out and play this summer he is 6, where we live is on the main road so I'm always out watching him, or my friend lives a few houses away from me will be out because her little girl is the same age as Dylan and the would play together xx

 

[Vonnie18]

My boys 9 and 7 (almost 8) have been playing out on their own for a few years (youngest in the past year), just out front of house along to park about 2 mins from our house. In the past 6 months I have been allowing my oldest to go along to his friends on his own who is on the other side of the village. They both have their own mobiles though so they can get in touch with me wherever they are x

 

[kerrie24]

My ten year old doesnt play out further than the street,if he went to his friends I would drop him off.My 6 year old(7 in feb) wont be allowed anywhere on her own for a very long time.Too much risk these days.
That little April was just outside with her friends when she went missing this year,along with all the others over the years,they are never far away.sara payne was with her older siblings in a quiet area surrounded by fields.Some people might think I am over protective but no,definitely not.