Attention, please keep your comments to yourself

[bekki_d18]

So my DH got in bed this morning as he had been working a night shift last night and his colleague Amy had made a few comments (I don't really like her because she was having an affair with my friends husband not so long ago). She told DH to tell me to stop complaining as I was not that big (I have not complained) and that I should stop posting pics of my bumps on facebook because it makes the other pregnant women my DH works with feel bad as my bump is so neat. I told my husband to tell her not to look at them if it bothers her so bloody much. I see this girl once every yr at the christmas do and that is it.

To top it off DH told me he has booked his paternity leave for the end of February and then annual leave in March. I said so what you going to do after I have given birth? He said I will book one day off, ONE!!! Well FX'd I dont need a section or I will be on my own.

I could not get into a full blown conversation as he had just done a 10 hour shift and was tired but I thought he would at least take a week off after the birth to help me recover a bit and spend time with us!!

 

[Cookie1979]

Well firstly his colleague need to shut the hell up...you should delete her off your friends list on fb, then she doesn't have to worry about looking at it. My hubby had to put in when he takes his paternity but then if I go overdue he will adjust it so he's off from when I give birth...can your hubby not do that? The point of paternity leave is so that he is there to help you in the weeks following you giving birth, its not there for him to take a holiday!!!

Have a serioius talk with him, he should tell this Amy to p"ss off, and he should arrange to be off when you give birth.

Hope you manage to sort things out, I would be fuming if I was in your shoes.

 

[CelticNiamh]

Why he even tell you I hope he told her to mind her own!

First I block her from my FB page or set your page to private, I think you can change your settings so she cant see your pictures or status updates, who needs some one like that commenting on your life! grrr mind your own comes to mind! esp as she is not even a good friend to you, you just know her from your DH work, two figure salute to her from you I think

Next when your DH is more awake and recoverd from his night shift, sit him down and tell him, its more important to have him home with you after baby is born not before hand. plus you cant plan the exact day baby will arrive so tell him to arrange that as soon as labour starts his time off starts so he doesnt book his week and then you go a week over IYKWIM happens so often.

you will need him when baby arrives, plus its important he has that precious time bonding with his baby

Im sure when you explain it, he will see what you mean!

 

[bekki_d18]

She is not a friend on my facebook it is because DH is tagged in my bump shots that she can see them.

I am sure he will move it as he said originally he was going to take two weeks off straight after LO has arrived and then was going to go back to work for two weeks and then take another two weeks off. This way all the visitors will have gone away and we can have our proper family time. But he will be getting told when he gets up otherwise I will be going to maccy ds for my lunch and bringing nothing for him!!

 

[CelticNiamh]

She is not a friend on my facebook it is because DH is tagged in my bump shots that she can see them.

I am sure he will move it as he said originally he was going to take two weeks off straight after LO has arrived and then was going to go back to work for two weeks and then take another two weeks off. This way all the visitors will have gone away and we can have our proper family time. But he will be getting told when he gets up otherwise I will be going to maccy ds for my lunch and bringing nothing for him!!

You can block her, or when you upload pictures you can retrict who see them in the privacy section so she wont be able to see them if your DH is tagged in them.

How rude is she, grrrrr Im so mad at her for you and I dont know you, that would drive me nuts! she has danger written all over her cow!

Okok checking in the hormones

Im sure your DH will come round, moment of madness LOL wouldnt surprise me if some one told him it was a good idea to do that!

 

[bekki_d18]

Well I am seeing her in three weeks so I will make sure I pad myself all over and wear a bin liner so I dont upset her haha

Stupid Mare. Thank you she is now blocked

 

[winegums]

omg she sounds like a complete idiot! jealous much lol!

as for your dh taking time off, your due in jan right? welllll when my OH took his leave straight after the birth i was annoyed lol! at first they just sleep and eat all the time, i found it really easy... then AFTER the first couple of weeks was when i actually needed him but he was back at work

literally when he was off work there was nothing for him to do, the baby just slept and ate and as i was breastfeeding OH couldn't help. I spent the first week or two sleeping on and off with LO cuddled in bed etc

oh AND i had a c section and when i got back from the hospital i was up cleaning, going out shopping, driving etc straight away.... people make it sound a lot worse than it is!

you never know, you may end up grateful that he has taken the time off later

*just trying to put a positive note on it *

 

[bekki_d18]

It is nice to hear both sides of it. My SIL said the first few weeks are the boring stage. She is a bitch

 

[lottie77]

Hi is your hubby in the police ??? you will sure need him after you give birth you dont know how you are going to feel you could be full of energy or you could be knackered and need all the help you can get from him and I know how their shifts are so no point him being on nights or backshifts whilst you are dealing with a newborn just after giving birth you will and up shattered and resentful. Its a special time to be shared together

My hubby has given his sargent my due date and has had 4 weeks leave ( 2 weeks paternity & 2 weeks leave) authorised to take when I go into labour , not from a specific date so that he can spend every minute of his leave with me and the kids and the new baby

 

[Reds05]

My brother is also in the police and gave his sergeant my SIL's due date so they knew he would be off sometime around then.

As it happens, her waters broke 6 days early and she had her wee girl on Monday so my brothers leave started on the day her waters broke. With his rest days etc, he's not due to go back to work until the beginning of Dec, which is just as well as he would have been on nightshift and covershifts this week and next.

Although they do pretty much sleep and eat for the first couple of weeks, my brother has enjoyed the bonding he's had so far with her and don't think he will regret being off straight after she was born. He's also there to help with their 3 year old to make sure he's not feeling left out and ensure his routine is not mucked up too much.

My DH has told his boss when my due date is and it planning on being off the couple of weeks after I give birth. This means he will spend time with me and LO but also be able to help out taking DS to school etc so I'm not having to get up and out for 8.30!!

 

[bekki_d18]

Yes he is in the police, dreading there stupid shifts patterns!!!!

 

[Reds05]

My brother and his wife can fully sympathise!!!

They are both in the police and have had to work out their shift pattern to ensure there is childcare for their 3 year old. Not sure what will happen now as they have a wee girl (only born on Monday 8th) and my SIL is due to go back to work in April.

I admire them being able to juggle both their shifts and childcare - not sure I could do it.

 

[bekki_d18]

I thought of joining the police but see my DH little enough as it is.

 

[Reds05]

It has to be said that they see quite a bit of each other as their off days are usually the same.

Also, because they are both in the police, they understand when the other one is late home because they've had to deal with an arrest etc

However, because they both work shifts, they rely totally on family looking after my nephew as there is no childminder or nursery that is open early or late enough to look after him.

They love their job and my SIL was gutted that she had to go onto desk duty when she was pregnant as she missed being on the beat (although totally understood that, safety wise, she had to go on light duties)

I had a sample of what it was like to work shifts as was doing my nursing training a few years ago and I remember there was one week where I only put DS to his bed once - felt like I was abandoning him for someone else to deal with , not a nice feeling.

 

[minkymoo]

Stupid ignorant bitch. That's all I can say.

 

[layneeleigh]

What a cow this woman must be! I would make sure I looked like a million bucks when you see her at the x-mas party just to rub it in her face more! Can you say"jealous much"!

 

[bekki_d18]

Well after talking to my DH it is because she struggled to conceive with her first and is now pregnant with her second, but does that mean i cannot talk about my pregnancy and have a moan if need be about my back. I feel bad for people who struggle to conceive and one of my friends is really struggling but she would never make somebody who was lucky to conceive straight away feel bad. I had a cry, a shout, a bath and i am working up the energy to get some fast food and I will be right as rain again

 

[Reds05]

What a cow this woman must be! I would make sure I looked like a million bucks when you see her at the x-mas party just to rub it in her face more! Can you say"jealous much"!

Couldn't agree more!!!

See if you could get a couple of pamper treatments - facial, manicure etc before it so you look you're absolute best!!

Wear a killer dress that shows off your bump and make sure she hears you saying how much you love being pregnant and what a fantastic experience it is!!

People like her are just jealous - don't let her rain on your parade, this is you and DH's special time so don't let anyone take that away from you!!

 

[Reds05]

Well after talking to my DH it is because she struggled to conceive with her first and is now pregnant with her second, but does that mean i cannot talk about my pregnancy and have a moan if need be about my back. I feel bad for people who struggle to conceive and one of my friends is really struggling but she would never make somebody who was lucky to conceive straight away feel bad. I had a cry, a shout, a bath and i am working up the energy to get some fast food and I will be right as rain again

You're right - just because she struggled to conceive, doesn't give her the right to take away the joy (and drawbacks) you feel in your pregnancy.

My SIL has a couple of friends who haves struggled and even tried IVF (unsuccessfully unfortunately) but none of them made her feel bad about falling pregnant easily.

You have a moan if you want and enjoy your fast food, it always cheers me up!!

 

[emme]

you should unblock her and add even more pictures, that'll shut the tramp up! ;-) xx