Bachelorette at 37 weeks pregnant??

[ParisJeTadore]

My sister is getting married two weeks before my due date. I know this is cutting it pretty close but honestly, these things can't always be planned...and weren't!

She's having a bachelorette party the weekend before the wedding and has put me in charge of planning. First she wanted to do a pole dancing class but now has changed her mind and wants a burlesque class instead. She seems to think I will be fine participating but I really don't feel its a great idea? Am I being too uptight or is this an understandable response? I am going to be as big as a whale and energy levels, especially after going out for dinner, probably aren't going to be so hot! Is it fair to tell her I will just show up but watch instead of participate?

Also, has anyone been rougly 38 weeks pregnant and a maid of honour?? I know I will do whatever I can to manage the day but am already getting nervous about it! Any tips?

 

[MindUtopia]

I would say that more than likely you won't feel up to doing a full on dance class at 37 weeks. But certainly, if you are feel generally well, you should be fine to spend the weekend with them, going out to dinner, attending the class but sitting it out and letting everyone else enjoy it, and probably calling it an early night if the other ladies want to stay out partying. I think if your sister wants you to plan it (instead of a friend who will be more able to participate), she'll have to understand that you won't be able to keep up at the same speed as everyone else. The only thing I would caution is just having a frank discussion with her about making alternate plans in case you aren't able to attend the weekend or her wedding in case you're in labour or recovering after birth. Realistically, you very well could miss one or both (and trust me, after having a baby I was in no state to have attended a wedding, I was lucky if I managed to brush my teeth the first few weeks). I had my daughter, my first, at 37 weeks, so it certainly is a possibility. I would just be upfront with her that it could happen and make sure you both agree on someone who will set in and fulfill your duties if you can't be there.

 

[lanet]

I'm not 37 weeks but I'm in the thick of twin morning sickness and exhaustion and also in charge of my sisters wedding stuff. First the shower is being hosted at my house this weekend and I'm so sick I can't even look at food! Then the wedding is 2 weeks later 14 hours away! I'm exhausted and sometimes want to cancel the whole thing, but I'm sucking it up so far, I just can't wait until she's married and off on her honeymoon.
I dont think it's unreasonable to let her know you have too much on your plate and that you will just show up for dinner. I had dd at 36 and 6 so you may not even make it there, and she would need a back up anyway.

 

[RaspberryK]

I attended my cousins 21st birthday at 36 weeks, I still had a whale of a time.
I was absolutely massive, drove 3 hours to get there, had 4 hours sleep before driving back with only my younger non driving brother with me.
I say enjoy it before you can't go out again for ages.
Xx

 

[sethsmummy]

I would say that more than likely you won't feel up to doing a full on dance class at 37 weeks. But certainly, if you are feel generally well, you should be fine to spend the weekend with them, going out to dinner, attending the class but sitting it out and letting everyone else enjoy it, and probably calling it an early night if the other ladies want to stay out partying. I think if your sister wants you to plan it (instead of a friend who will be more able to participate), she'll have to understand that you won't be able to keep up at the same speed as everyone else. The only thing I would caution is just having a frank discussion with her about making alternate plans in case you aren't able to attend the weekend or her wedding in case you're in labour or recovering after birth. Realistically, you very well could miss one or both (and trust me, after having a baby I was in no state to have attended a wedding, I was lucky if I managed to brush my teeth the first few weeks). I had my daughter, my first, at 37 weeks, so it certainly is a possibility. I would just be upfront with her that it could happen and make sure you both agree on someone who will set in and fulfill your duties if you can't be there.

^^ WSS

She cant exepct you to participate in things like pole dancing or burlesque dancing .. its not realistic at that stage of pregnancy.. not to mention the exertion of either could set you off. She should be more than accepting of this if she is expecting you to plan it all.
I also second the fact that you might not be able to go at all depending on how you are.. you could have bad spd/contractions/slow labour or all sorts of reasons that could mean you couldn't attend at all and therefore she needs a back up who is going to help you plan it all and take over if the need arises. This also goes for the wedding not just the party. Concessions may need to be made just incase

 

[Eleanor ace]

Burlesque dancing would have been fine for me at 37 weeks but pole dancing would have been impossible and dangerous for everyone involved . If you don't fancy it I'd just tell her that you think it is very unlikely that you'll be able to manage it physically (you could always say you're doctor/MW has said it's not allowed- people tend not to argue with medical professionals) but that you are looking forward to cheering everyone on and will be able to take lots of fun photos.

 

[Kirstiedenman]

I would say depends on you personally and how active you are during pregnancy. I would have definitely been able to do a burlesque class at 37 weeks. The day of my due date i took my son to a play centre and was running around climbing up and down obstacle courses even the day i went into labor we went for an hrs walk while i was contracting. If you have stayed active you should be fine but if you havent and you are exhausted it wouldnt be a good idea for things like blood pressure and if you were to go into labor the next day you might be very exhausted and more inclined to having interventions.

 

[ParisJeTadore]

Great suggestions, thank you! I took what you all advised and spoke with my sister. I told her that I was willing to plan and if she wanted a pole dancing party to go for it but not to realistically expect me to participate. She still assumes I can do parts of the burlesque class and, although I am an active person, don't think that is going to be possible. My sister has never been pregnant before and, much like I was before having babies, assumes that you feel pretty much normal even late in the game. What can you do! I told her I would be happy to sit back, watch and take lots of pictures

I think I will get a good friend of mine to help me with the planning so that way, if I am unable to attend, she can always take over and do it herself.

 

[sethsmummy]

that sounds like a fab plan hun!