Being a Mom and Having a Career

[Mrs Excited]

Hello,

I'm currently TTC #1 but I was curious how many of you have children and a career as well. When I talk about careers I mean ones that are more than 40 hrs/week.

I work at a construction company and I have a feeling that I will have to choose a family or a career but I can't have both . Did anybody have to take a step down from their position after having a baby?

Any questions or comments are appreciated!!!

 

[discoclare]

Hi,

I am a scientist. Technically my contract says 37 1/2 hours per week, but of course we are supposed to be professionals and as such before DD was born I did way more than 40hours per week. Since DD was born I tend to stick to my hours. This does mean that I don't have the same number of responsibilities that I had previously, but this partly as when I was on maternity leave my boss left and when I came back I got a new one who wasn't such a slave driver. I do worry that my career is affected sometimes, but then I think that I also want a better life balance and if that means that I don't progress as much or get the same number of opportunities to attend conferences etc, then so be it. I am lucky that my employer is quite childcare friendly (though we are about to be taken over so that may change).

You can do it if you have good childcare, I have friends working for large London law firms, but they don't see their kids Monday-Friday and that's a decision they had to make. But they do make a huge effort spending quality time on the weekend and having plenty of vacation. It depends what you want really. I also had friends who quit their jobs on maternity leave as their employer told them they would have to come back doing their old hours with no option to reduce. In fact one of these also worked for a construction firm but here in the UK, she was told if the client needed her there then they needed her there and she would need to accommodate that and couldn't work to a set of defined hours.

I think you just need to think about what you want and if you don't mind giving up some responsibility. It may not mean a step down, but perhaps a lack of progression for a few years on the track you were previously on. And maybe consider other employers as well who may have more family freindly policies. Good luck!

 

[Mrs Excited]

Thank you so much for your reply!

I am an estimator for this construction company so in the summer I could be doing 60+ hours per week. I've already decided that I want to see my children as much as I can. So when I do get pregnant and have to make a decision I have a feeling I only have two options.

A - Take a step down and become a receptionist/administration
The problem with this one is that I find adminstration kind of boring. Plus this would be a huge pay cut.

B - Become a stay at home mom and work/open a business that I could do from home. Which I don't even know what I could do.... Perhaps open a day home.
The problem with this one is even more limited funds. But I was raised by a stay at home mom and I kind of want that for my children as well.

My next question is... What career could I look into getting that is family friendly?

 

[mandarhino]

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[mrsholmes]

Im area manager for a housing association , contract is 36 hours a week always work most. I tend to do 8-5 ish and then evenings once lo is in bed . I spend 2 hours a night and hour in the morning with Scott and its good quality time, we have a good wage and can enjoy nice things, trips and holidays because of my career. I also think once in full time school I'll he glad of my career. Because I save toil and work is Flexible I have never missed any important shows/ parties/ jabs etc. I personally could never stay at home or not have a challenging job x

 

[Ceejay123]

I hope this is doable! Haha. I plan on working in forensics and security for the police - assisting with criminal cases. (Fraud an Paedophiles), which will mean I have to work many many hours. I'm only studying now and I Already feel guilty! Lol

 

[Mrs Excited]

I thank you for all the great advice and personal stories I know that this will be an ongoing question in my head until I have a child. But in the meantime I love hearing about all the diverse career paths on this site.

Did you choose your career with the idea of having kids in the future? I chose mine on a whim and to prove to all the men I worked with that I was smart. Not the best move on my part but it has shown me to stop caring about what other people think of me

And in regards to studying for school and having children, I say go for it! My two friends have been doing this and you can tell they enjoy it. Good luck to you and your schooling and good luck to those going further into their careers

 

[mandarhino]

Yes. I switched to the public sector in my late 20s as I knew I wanted kids and I was more likely to benefit from family friendly policies in that sector. My previous private sector employer was not accommodating at all. I did a master's degree part time, while working full time, to help me make the switch.