Being told not to bother..

[xTaylorsMummy]

OH has received a text from both his sisters. With a perfectic excuse saying not to bother buying for there kids (two each) as they don't know what to get them so doesn't know what to tell us to get them?! And they don't know what to get ours, so not to bother this year?!

What do we do? Tbh I'm really pissed off there not bothering with ours. We go up there too see all OHs family every month, they come down rwiceva year! (they live 80miles away), they never ring or anything too see how they are ect.
My mum died last year i don't speak to sone of my family and the fact there not making an effort has pissed me off!
Also they have never asked what to get my two and it seems werid that both sisters have said the sane thing?

So what do I do? Buy and have them not buy for mine, or not buy and say you told us not to bother ?

P.s after both the texts I did say don't bother then my kids will have enough anyway.


P.p.s ours have never been wanted by OHs parents and was not happy we had them!

 

[Blah11]

I'd not buy for them. They maybe can't afford it? TBH I think you're being a little harsh and unfair

 

[TattiesMum]

To be honest me and my siblings came to this arrangement years ago when the children were small ... like you we rarely see each other (we live a long way apart) and it had got to the point when our eldest children, who are all much the same age, were about 3 when they would actually ask 'who is Auntie D/Uncle N/Auntie B/Auntie M' when they were given presents from them/us

I LIKE the arrangement it gives me more money to spend on my own kids and I don't have to worry about budgeting for and choosing presents for children that I don't really know

 

[momandpeanut]

I wouldnt buy for them more to spend on your own !

 

[mandy81]

I can see where you coming from hun

but me, my family and OH's family have all said the same thing not to buy each others kids, it's just getting a bit much and way too expensive xx

 

[Laura2919]

I dont think your being unfair..
I had nearly the same issue this year, OH sister text me to say should we just buy for the kids. I said well thats up to her and she said her OH said because thats what he does so should she, I said your OH has a huge family, there is only you and Mark, Whats buying a present for your only brother gonna do? Not break the bank surely?? So she has decided to buy for us now and we are buying for her... I think they should buy for the kids, kids arent that hard really, toys, clothes, vouchers, anything works! Its just a lame excuse not to spend money.

 

[Laura2919]

And if they are skint then be honest and say it. I dont have a lot of money but I still buy for ALL my family, I just start earlier in the year..

My mum stopped buying my cousins presents when they got to 16 but all kids in our family get something up to that age.. Thats just how we are. I will always buy for my niece no matter how old she is though.

 

[sabby52]

I can see where you coming from hun

but me, my family and OH's family have all said the same thing not to buy each others kids, it's just getting a bit much and way too expensive xx

wss (she is my sister)

 

[xTaylorsMummy]

tbh they cant be that skint. lol.

And my kids know who they are, we see them every month. the sad thing is my oldist whos 2nhalf adores her grandma and they just dont make the effort with her or my youngest. I mean they are NEVER happy for us. OH is the only one out of him and his sisters who work and who has since he left school at 16!

 

[Laura2919]

tbh they cant be that skint. lol.

And my kids know who they are, we see them every month. the sad thing is my oldist whos 2nhalf adores her grandma and they just dont make the effort with her or my youngest. I mean they are NEVER happy for us. OH is the only one out of him and his sisters who work and who has since he left school at 16!

In that case I wouldnt waste my time.. I would make no effort to speak to them from now on and let them contact you. Its just a lame excuse by the sounds of things..

 

[mandy81]

does the grandma buy the kiddies a christmas presents hun ??? xx

 

[xTaylorsMummy]

yeah not much lol she gets them an outfit and toy each

she only buys them something for xmas and there birthday, never anything inbetween

 

[Laura2919]

does the grandma buy the kiddies a christmas presents hun ??? xx

I was gonna ask this..

 

[Laura2919]

yeah not much lol she gets them an outfit and toy each

she only buys them something for xmas and there birthday, never anything inbetween

My mum loves buying all 3 of her grandkids presents whether it be Christmas, Birthday or just because she see it and thought they would like it..

 

[lorrilou]

I wouldnt bother tbh, spend that extra money on yourself or your kids.x

 

[mandy81]

well then hun don't bother buying their kiddies, spend the extra on your own kids thats what we do now it's a lot less stress tbh xx

 

[xTaylorsMummy]

yeah and so did my mum! but she died at xmas last year. Which makes it 10000% worse because they have the option to be grandparents where as my mum never did! she say dexter for 6 weeks then passd away. Although my dad does makew up for it and spoils taylor! hes had a stroke and in wheelchair but he goes shopping everyweek with eaither me or my sister and buys taylors lots lol like sweeties ect taylor only has to say please lol

 

[Laura2919]

Well they have your dad hun.. All that matters is you love them and you do, if thats how they want to be at Christmas when its supposed to be something you do with your family let them.. If they dont pay an interest its only them that are missing out...
Like everyone else said the money you was gonna spend on their kids spend on your kids or yourself.

 

[amie-leigh]

yeah i agree spend the money on your kids instead x

 

[xTaylorsMummy]

thats what i said to OH im going to buy taylor n dexter some stocking filliers. They have had taylor once since she has been born at that was at 4months old, shes now 3 in feb! never had dexter either. I feel sorry for OH, its doing my head in!

OH owes his sister 60 quid from 3 years ago, and thats all we ever hear about from in-laws, when ever we go up there "are you going to leave any money for stacey"..
When we first had dexter we went up there, and my money was due inti my account the next day, and it hadnt gone in, so we had no nappies and just enough petrol to get home. Asked his mum to borrow us some she said she couldnt afford anything, That night she gave staceys son A FIVER!! for using the potty!! he was potty train until a year later!!