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Hi Hope! I think donor eggs is a great option. DH and I plan to donate if we have any additional embryos after we feel our family is complete (I’m currently pregnant after first transfer and we have 4 more PGS normal embryos on ice).

Wicky - Hi! Great to hear from you! I’m glad the MS is finally waning and that your MIL is showing improvement - what a relief! I’ve been feeling much better the last few days or so. Eating is still kinda hit or miss but I’m definitely getting my appetite back. I hope you continue to feel better each day!

Rain - I hope you are starting to feel better! Being sick this time of year is just the worst. Get well soon!

Vonn - I worry about BF too. It’s somethimg I want so much and I feel like whenever I want something that much, it’s a struggle (like getting pregnant)! I know I shouldn’t think like that. DH thinks that because I’m somewhat “well endowed” (especially after becoming pregnant) that it will be easy - I told him I don’t think it works like that! :wacko:

Hi Terry, Spud, TTC! How are you all doing? Anxiously awaiting Wish’s update too!

Had my 2nd scan on Tuesday and while I was a bit nervous as my nausea was dissipating, baby girl is right on target! Strong heartbeat of 180 and measuring a day ahead. She was wiggling around too! :) 9w3d today. My SS (13) is home sick with a head cold today. I feel bad but I’m going to try to stay away...after the stomach flu at 6 weeks I don’t want to get sick again. I have such little energy right now as is!
 
:wave: all!

10/11 DPO today. BFN. Needless to say, I'm disappointed. I did have some significant cramping this morning. It started off as light cramping yesterday. It's too early for me to get AF cramps (I never get them until 13/14 DPO). So, I'm hoping against hope that I've got a late implanter. I know it's unlikely, but a girl can dream!
 
Hi Hope! We used donated embryos and it worked great, obviously! We also applies to be adoptive parents. Feel free to pm me if u want to chat about it! And as Terri says, child free and gorgeous is another perfectly good path too.

Congrats on your scan Ask! They get more and more fun, don’t they? Glad u r feeling better!!

Ttc- fxfxfxfx!!

So one funny story from the weekend solo w two year old twins- I was changing the diaper of twin a, who was doing all sorts of antics to have me put the apple scented lotion on him (that’s how he rolls) and turned around and twin b was sitting on the kiddie table (a big nono) completely pantsless just hangin out, looking at me. Hahaaaaa! Such goofballs!

I also tried to take them to the nature center but forgot it was closed. Being an adventurer we went for a short hike. It was freezing, so the main hike activity was pulling off their mittens and then crying because their hands hurt, then I put them back on, and repeat. Oh well that’s ok. No one was lost in the woods and no coyotes came to carry one off (darn! Just kidding haha). Also twin b likes to copy twin a now, so twin a plopped down in the leaves and gave a hearty giggle of glee. Twin b plopped down next to him and smiled and gave the most fake forced laugh it made me laugh!

I had enough help that the weekend was doable, and not too hard. In the beginning they were on their best behavior and went to sleep right away, didn’t throw food, etc. I think they were like, one Mom disappeared, maybe I’m next!! By the end of the weekend they felt much better and trashed the house like crazy flying monkeys. It was a zoo. Sigh! Cest la vie! Lol.

Any moms of older kids have tips on getting tots to clean up their toys???? Lol

Tg I’m finally feeling better myself. Phew.
 
Terri - Thanks for thinking of me! I'm sorry you also haven't had a little one yet either. Are you still trying? OMG, last week and the Missle scare was seriously the most terrifying thing in my life. We all got alerts on our phone's saying a missle was going to hit in 10-15 minutes. There is absolutely NOTHING you can do to prepare. We don't have basements in Hawaii and there are only a couple hidden shelters left over from WWII hidden in the fields to far to get to. We called family and said bye and waited for it to hit...and waited...and waited....then thank God we got the message saying it was false. I guess Japan just had the same scare a couple days ago. So weird, but i'm glad everyone is ok.

Rainy - I forgot you did embryo adoption. Did you end up with identical or fraternal twins? We are torn right now between adopting 1 PGD tested embryo or 2 non PGD tested embryos which would be transferred at the same time. They are both the same cost, but not sure what to do. Both parents have had healthy children previously and the PGD tested one had twins though I'm not sure if they were fraternal or identical. Sounds like they are fun though and keep you busy, I'm so happy for you all.

Ask - Congratulations, that's great you are going to donate your embryos
 
(I wrote thiscthe Other day and then got distracted so it prob looks old - I’ll catch up!)
Hello hello everyone!! My goodness what a week!! We have our boys - they are incredible. Both very healthy, very big boys - Timothy (A) was born at 9:10am, weighing 7.05lbs, height of 20”; Mr Malcolm, my Mama’s boy, was born one min later, 6.03, 19”. No complications with them except just trying to get all amniotic fluids out of them. I, however, ended up hemorrhaging and lost about 1/2 my blood. Needed a transfusion, but my vitals remained stable the whole time. Thankfully they recovered me nicely and I was back in the room with everyone by 11:30 I think. But pretty out of it all day and night. We’ve had the boys stay in the nursery all nights so we could get some sleep. It’s worked out great. DH is a rockstar at this Daddy thing.

I’ll be back later to post more but those are the highlights. Heading home today. Thank you all so much for your thoughts and well wishes. What i used to think was too unbelievable to have happen, I now feel is unbelievable to have never happened at all. I’m crazy in love and obsessed.

Miki - so glad you stopped being so hard on yourself. Sounds like it made a world of difference.

Rain- yuck I’m sorry you’re sick!! I hope it passes soon!

Terri - thinking of you my friend

Wicky - soooo happy it sounds like things are turning around for you!!

Ask - sounds like things are coming around for you too! Awesome!
 
Thanks for the update wish! Sorry to hear about the hemorrhaging, but it sounds like all is well now. SO happy for you!
 
WISH!!! ❤️️❤️️❤️️❤️️ So happy to hear things are okay. The boys sound just perfect. And it's wonderful you already have a mama's boy. �� What a scare, though. Sorry to hear things got a little dramatic for you. But going home today...the fun really begins! It's so beautiful to hear how in love new moms are. Those emotions are so strong. Much love to your family!
 
Congratulations, Wish!!! So happy for you! The hemorrhage sounds quite scary but I am glad to hear you remained stable and are being discharged today! Your boys sound absolutely lovely. xx
 
Sorry was discharged on Thurs. been in the real world for 2 days now and HOLY CRAP IS IT TOUGH!! We feed every 3 hrs and the first night was an absolute disaster. We learned a lot though and got the cribs moved into our room, got all bottles and changing supplies into our room, including something to put on top of malcolm’s little guy when changing bc he inevitably fountains the room! :haha:
We are already sleep deprived and it’s day 3. I can’t believ how tough this is but then you get some kangaroo time and it all fades away. :cloud9:

I hope you are all well!!
 
Oh my goodness the boys weighed as much as full term singletons!! That’s incredible! I can’t imagine how hard it must have been the last few weeks.

Im so glad you are now doing better! Did you get extra days in the hospital? So smart to take advantage of the nursery. Now no more stories like that to freak me out!!! You be careful and take care of yourself very closely over the next few weeks.

Consider getting one of those baby formula espresso machines (sounds like bf is not on the table if I’m reading correctly).
 
Wish we posted at the same time!

Forgot to also say congratulations on the gorgeous healthy boys.

Set up a feeding station so one of you can feed both and you can go in shifts! And call the night nannies or postpartum doulas for a shift or two the first couple weeks (and beyond). They can give you rest and all sorts of tips.

We used the expensive premixed formula botttles overnight the first couple weeks. Then you could measure out the formula into the bottles and just add water at night (if u don’t get the machine).
 
Hope- Ours are fraternal- transferred two high quality embryos. We love our little munchkins, but twins are super hard. You can get through it, but talk to some people who had twins and do some research on the added risks. Could you transfer one of the non tested embryos at a time and pay extra if needed? What grade are they? Mine were not pgd tested.
 
Baby espresso machines - we love our baby brezza. When we got out of town, we miss it dearly!
 
Wow, wow, wow, I'm so happy for you, Wish! You must be so in love -- doubly! :cloud9: How scary that you lost so much blood. I hope that you recover fast and well. Enjoy your adorable twins!

Yeah, I found it tough too, so I can imagine how much more difficult it must be for you. But I found that DH and I learned fast, and now we're comfortable in our new lives. Unfortunately, BF is still incredibly difficult, as I found that gummy is barely drawing any milk from my breast. The milk is there, he just seems to view me as a pacifier and someone to snuggle up to and fall asleep on! I don't know how I'm going to reduce the supplementation by bottle. I've tried so hard, and the sleep deprivation is insane. It doesn't look good, and I've been close to giving up several times in the past few days, but the good thing is that DH is so helpful and supportive!
 
Congrats Wish!! I'm so happy this day is finally here!!! Love ya!

I was talking to a woman last night who had a successful IVF on her fourth try. I thought-maybe I should have tried four. Although now that I think about it, I can't remember how many I did. Doesn't matter. I'm happy enough where I am, but sometimes you have to wonder.

Hi to everyone else and Hope, glad you understood my post. Autocorrect is the worst and it was first thing in the morning so excuse me.
 
Terri- it’s so frustrating that we can’t do two paths at the same time - like have kids and not have kids. One will always wonder about the other path.

Mikki- how frustrating! Babies are so funny. They are all so different. Have you tried a nursing vacation? Just do nothing but get skin time and breastfeed for as long as you can (if doc is ok and baby’s weight is fine). Make him do it until he realizes how yummy it is :) no bottles! See if u can make it for 3 hours one day, and six the next, even go cold turkey after he gets the hang of it. Maybe he will figure it out. Also do u have slow flow nipples on the bottles? Supposedly that helps.

So nice to go outside today for the first tine in ages!
 
Thanks, Rain! Yes, we use low flow nipples on the bottles. I have tried basically everything! I actually also got the idea to try out a nursing vacation, and I was to try it today. But I gave up almost immediately. It seems that gummy can't get milk from me fast enough, and he ends up very hungry. He also has the habit of being mostly asleep while nursing. He will nurse for a very long time, and (from weighing him) will draw close to no milk when in this sleepy state. Even when he’s more awake, he doesn’t take in much milk at all. It’s available, I can pump it out after, but he’s somehow not managing to get the milk. And I'm so sleep deprived I can't deal with this, all I want to do is sleep whenever possible. I usually get zero sleep at night. It doesn't seem that a nursing vacation could work in our case.

I think I'm at a crossroads with breastfeeding, and am about to go down "give up" lane. I had a meltdown and almost gave up completely today. Almost 6 weeks of waking Kai up every 2 or 3 hours, breastfeeding, bottle feeding the supplement, pumping after, putting him back to sleep, washing bottles, etc ... As he takes forever to wake up or to draw milk from my breast, the sessions are marathon sessions (one hour or more of nursing, with a small amount of milk taken in). I often have no time to do anything before the next session starts. 1 hour of sleep at a time is a luxury, and I'm still getting only about 3 hours maximum of total sleep per day. I tried to look at things in a positive fashion and enjoy time together with gummy, but the fatigue is just too much… it’s torture.

Because I was forced into supplementing so early, Kai seems to have become lazy at the breast. And my milk supply seems to be just a bit less than needed for him. The bottle feeding seems to have caused both issues, so I thought I'd try to only nurse today. This way, I could try to break him of the habit of using me as a pacifier! What happened instead is that he ended up waking and crying with hunger, and I gave in and got him a bottle. I couldn't stand to see him suffer :cry: I then had a meltdown when I realized that I probably had to give up trying to exclusively breastfeed. It has been too exhausting, mentally and physically. I regret listening to the negative lactation consultant, who sent me down the slippery slope of needing to bottle feed formula. I keenly mourn the loss of feeling the closeness and providing sustenance for my little guy.

On the other hand...If I stop breastfeeding, I think I will gain some sleep and some of my life back. DH has been supportive, and has done almost all the bottle feeds, but he’s now getting impatient and grumpy with me. He's showing flashes of unsupportive behavior, and it's hard for me to take. He needs more sleep (even though he gets a lot more than I do) and he’s going back to work next week. And gummy can have better sleep as well. He's such a mellow and good baby, and I haven't had the opportunity to enjoy that. I've told myself that giving up isn't a bad thing, but now that I'm faced with the reality, it's incredibly devastating :cry:
 
Oh Mikki that sounds so heartbreaking and frustrating! I know how you feel- I had done the marathon feedings and pumping sessions and finally had a lot of milk and my little ones looked at me like- no thank you, where’s my bottle??? Argh!!!! In the end you can’t force them and they have their own goofy opinions...

It’s sounds like everyone need s sleep and less stress! Quitting is a viable option and can be a huge relief. If you feel like it, there could also be a middle ground- you could do something like only pump 7am and 7 pm to make a little milk for him. Maybe try feeding him first thing in the morning, or not if it’s too much to deal with (been there)! If it made you feel better you could do something much more chill like that. I’m sorry you’re going through this!!
 
Miki - I've been there. It is a very difficult decision that only you can make. The only words of comfort I can offer is that you do get over it if you decide to stop the fight and just bottle feed. My LO is now almost one and doing so well and, as you realize, no one suffers any long term harm from being bottle fed. Fed is best. Also, a sane, well-rested mother is best!
 
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