Bit shocked!! Not sure how to play it...

[loopy loulou]

My son is 7 next week and just as he was going to bed tonight he told me that he can do something horrible with his willy! I asked him to show me as I wanted to make sure he wasn't hurting himself, and he pulled back his foreskin.

I was actually relieved it was nothing more than this, but to be honest I have been living in complete denial that my little man is growing up and will be discovering things like this!

I just said that willys are meant to be able to do that now you're getting bigger and it's not 'horrible'. I asked him if it hurt, and he said no.

He told me that his friend had showed him how to do it in the school toilets so he has been trying ever since!!

Now I know it's completely normal, but just wondered how much I should be talking to him about this at the moment? And should he be pulling it back to clean it etc..?

I told him that his body is private and he shouldn't be showing people at school though!

Any experiences would be greatly appreciated..

 

[Weeplin]

Hi, I don't have any experience as my son is only 15 months lol but I did read that once the boy can fully pull his foreskin back he should be taught how to properly clean it.

Other than that I don't see what else there is talk to him about at this stage and at his age except what you already have!

Hope I somewhat help lol

 

[emilyjade]

yes im sure when its retractable you are ment to clean it, maybe trying to find out who of his friends told him and speak with their mum too as maybe the friend told him its horrible ? do u have a partner? x

 

[loopy loulou]

yes im sure when its retractable you are ment to clean it, maybe trying to find out who of his friends told him and speak with their mum too as maybe the friend told him its horrible ? do u have a partner? x

Thanks, I know which friend it was so may speak to his mum! And yes I'm married.. but my husband was circumsised when he was 3 so has no experience of this!!

 

[DizzyMoo]

Tbh hun i'd do/say exactly what you have , you're right to tell him its not horrible as you dont want him thinking its something wrong or horrible. Yet he should be told he should do that to clean himself at this age & nothing more me thinks.
I'd have a word with the other lads mum too just in case but... try not to say " he said she said " stories, Just simply say they have both been showing eachother & you wanted to make sure she knew . if you start with the " your son showed my son" sometimes it can get the other parents back up if you get me x

 

[loopy loulou]

Tbh hun i'd do/say exactly what you have , you're right to tell him its not horrible as you dont want him thinking its something wrong or horrible. Yet he should be told he should do that to clean himself at this age & nothing more me thinks.
I'd have a word with the other lads mum too just in case but... try not to say " he said she said " stories, Just simply say they have both been showing eachother & you wanted to make sure she knew . if you start with the " your son showed my son" sometimes it can get the other parents back up if you get me x

Thanks, I am good friends with the boys mum and have spoken to her today and all is good. She didn't know he was able to do thiseither so was a bit surprised herself! She is going to talk to him about keeping bits private though.. I am definitely not blaming the boy or her, boys will be boys!! Suppose I just thought I wouldn't have to deal with 'willy' issues yet!!

I'm glad I have a good relationship with my son where he can tell me these things and hope it lasts a bit longer yet!..

Thanks for support..

 

[Minstermind]

Aw, that's wonderful that he will tell you those things. My son's the same which is great and I hope he always feels so comfortable. It's good that you were able to think beyond the initial shock (LOL, which I totally understand) to let him know it's not a horrible thing, as I think it's good for him to have a healthy attitude towards his penis and all that.

Just out of curosity, as my son was circumcised in the states when he was born so never had to deal with it.... do we *not* clean under the foreskin when they're little, like babies and whatnot? I don't know if I'm having a boy or girl yet but as I'm in Ireland now and may have a boy, there's the possibility of dealing with the foreskin thing and I had always thought before that it was meant to be cleaned regularly? But from reading this, it sounds like it's to be left alone until they're older and it's able to pull back?

Interesting thread, thanks. I think you handled the situation really well.

 

[loopy loulou]

Just out of curosity, as my son was circumcised in the states when he was born so never had to deal with it.... do we *not* clean under the foreskin when they're little, like babies and whatnot? I don't know if I'm having a boy or girl yet but as I'm in Ireland now and may have a boy, there's the possibility of dealing with the foreskin thing and I had always thought before that it was meant to be cleaned regularly? But from reading this, it sounds like it's to be left alone until they're older and it's able to pull back?

Hi, a boy's foreskin is attached when he's a baby so you definitely do not attempt to pull it back. I think it starts 'detatching' when they are about my son's age.. hence the discovery! And this is when they should clean it. Apparently, (after my recent research on the subject) the boy himself should be the first person to pull the foreskin back. There's no rush at all..

Congratulations by the way, and good luck. x and Thankyou!

 

[Minstermind]

Thank you! Ah that's great to know, I'll definitely be leaving it alone then if I have a boy, lol.. great gems of wisdom to be found on this site.

 

[flower01]

i have no experience but i would start the gentle approach of sex ed now.... not nessessarily spill all but start with maybe what will start to happen to his body in the next few years...
it then leads you on to the big version of the birds and the bees in a few years time and gets him time to get used to it

x

 

[lottie7]

I have two girls and I have just realised that if I ever have a boy I will just not have a clue! I think you gave him a great answer though.

xx