Blazing row with OH :( scared ill miscarry

[Blue_bumpkin]

I am 5.5 weeks. I have just had an explosive argument with my OH. I started it. I seem to be suffocating him lately nothing he does is good enough I know its my hormones but this was so wrong of me. I said some awful things as did he and he then left. Ive been crying now for an hour. Could this have harmed my pregnancy? My heart is racing and i feel terrible now all i want is a hug from OH and to tell him i am sorry. Im not sure if its from crying or what but i am cramping now x

 

[Shanlee16]

Honey don't worry an argument with your OH cannot cause a miscarriage. Miscarriages in the first trimester are almost always genetic abnormalities. Try not to worry!

 

[Periwinkle58]

Don't worry you'll be fine OH n I fought like crazy the first 3 months due to my hormones and him adjusting to the situation. He literally acted out and we would fight about him not doing anything or offering me support so it sounds like what happened with you. Expecting a baby is a big event and takes some getting used to. Don't worry about it, he'll come around and be amazing and your hormones will settle in. Your baby will be fine. Our stuff got so bad I wanted to leave him lol now everything is amazing and I'm 27wks and the baby is fine. Just try to relax

 

[Blue_bumpkin]

I am so angry with myself because we had an amazing chilled weekend and i just flipped this morning before he left to visit his mum. It was something so insignificant. He stormed out ad slammed my front door so hard the door frame snapped 😢 I calmed down the minute he left and called to apologise but he needed his own cool down so we've only just spoke and sorted things. I have anxiety and can be very clingy. Im very needy as a partner and it just seems so much more heightened at the minute. Hopefully things will calm down xx

 

[red_head]

Stress won't harm a pregnancy unless its been a prolonged thing over a significant period of time.
However, his response, slamming a door hard enough to break the frame, is not okay. No matter what, a man should never behave like that. He should understand that you are going through a lot, and will be cranky because of your hormones, and be more accepting and understanding than normal. Is this a one off? How does he normally behave when he's angry? I am really worried that's he's getting you so upset that you are scared about miscarrying.

 

[Blue_bumpkin]

Its a one off thats how i know he was so upset. Normally wen we row we both start laughing it never escalates. I dont think he intended it to break hes a fairly large man. Hes broken mugs at his mums before by just holding them too tight. Hes normally a big softie but doesnt realise his own strength. I think he reached a breakin point with me today and just had to leave. He puts up with an awful lot from me. We are ok now. I just hope my hormones settle soon i feel very emotional all the time and i am normally quite timid but my anger is thru the roof even my mum has noticed when in the car with me driving im effing and jeffing every 2 mins. The joys of pregnancy lol xx

 

[Blue_bumpkin]

And worrying about miscarriage is my thing at the minute. I jumped to hang my housecoat up to dry and worried about harming the baby. My anxiety meds have been adjusted because im pregnant. I just feel like im gettin too much for him to deal with hell im too much for myself sometimes. All i do is google things and worry myself stupid. Xx

 

[red_head]

Ok - you shouldn't feel bad though, really. You're going through a big change physically and mentally. And know that if things ever do escalate there is a lot of support available, here and elsewhere. Hope you make up soon x

 

[sadeyedlady]

The hormones suck. There are days when I want to kill everyone. However I've learned lessons from my first pregnancy. I took my anger out on everyone and that wasn't ok. I justified it to myself by blaming the hormones but it still wasn't right.

There are days now where I want to snap and scream but when I feel it coming on I step away to another room, go outside for a walk, listen to some music. I suffer with severe anxiety also and I get that it's hard. But I try to remember that words hurt. Especially those said in the heat of the moment and full of hormones.

Hope everything's ok with both of you. Sending lots of love, calm and peace your way

 

[Blue_bumpkin]

The hormones suck. There are days when I want to kill everyone. However I've learned lessons from my first pregnancy. I took my anger out on everyone and that wasn't ok. I justified it to myself by blaming the hormones but it still wasn't right.

There are days now where I want to snap and scream but when I feel it coming on I step away to another room, go outside for a walk, listen to some music. I suffer with severe anxiety also and I get that it's hard. But I try to remember that words hurt. Especially those said in the heat of the moment and full of hormones.

Hope everything's ok with both of you. Sending lots of love, calm and peace your way

I have 2 sons aswell and even pre pregnancy they could pick up on my anxiety playing up and always give me more cuddles which has become very medicinal for me. Its like time stops for a few seconds just with a hug. People around me know my anxiety is very hard going but like u say words hurt and my OH doesnt deserve it. I get very upset sometimes with him just leaving the house. He has a calming effect on me so i prefer him with me when possible but obviously understand that he needs time to himself too. I need to know where he is and what hes doing and i sound possesive but its not the case. If he was to not answer his fne to me or reply my first reaction is to think hes hurt somewhere. Its nothing to do with other women which I know to ppl outside our relationship it would appear to be. He tries his best with my 'needs' for want of a better word. Im just worried ive harmed the baby I have had quite bad cramping since our row and the more i cramp the more im worrying and its getting me worked up again its a vicious cycle. Is it at all possible ive caused a miscarriage from getting so worked up??x

 

[lilmisscaviar]

I hate my DH right now lol. He has just has been so lazy ever since I found out I was pregnant again. I'm sick 24/7 and need help. I tell him this on a daily basis. I ended up having to clean the whole house myself today while feeling like I was going to barf the whole time (which luckily I didn't or else I would have had to clean all over again) because I finally got tired of him promising to help but never doing it. I ended up yelling at him about it because he called me "nagging". I call it listening to what I say the first time or better yet doing it without me having to ask. Men just don't understand us pregnant ladies and our hormones honestly aren't helping matters. However as long as your argument wasn't physical, I'm sure the baby is fine. It would take months of stress rather than a short period of time to affect your baby in any way.

 

[Wish85]

No darling, a fight with your partner won't cause you to miscarry, and if you did it wouldn't be to do with that. Think about all the pregnant women in war torn countries who don't miscarry even though they are under constant stress and the fight or flight response is activated almost constantly (raised cortisol, adrenalin levels)

And hey, if it makes you feel any better..what pregnant last HASN'T been in a fight (or two, or three) with their partner during pregnancy? It's par for the course. Hormones can be a necessary evil at times!

 

[Shanlee16]

I understand your concerns about miscarrying, my DH just passed away and everything I do concerns me in one way or another. But I have to remind myself that if I have a miscarriage right now it is NOT my fault and that is was a genetic abnormality and would've happened regardless of what I did/do. I just have to stay calm and enjoy this while I can.

And ladies I know what it's like to fight with your DH when they don't listen or don't help out or don't pay enough attention but please remember how amazing they are and that life is fragile and that they could be gone in the blink of an eye. Take time to give them a kiss and tell them you love them. Don't take for granted your time together because life is a precious gift. I wish I had told my husband I loved him just one more time.

 

[Wish85]

I understand your concerns about miscarrying, my DH just passed away and everything I do concerns me in one way or another. But I have to remind myself that if I have a miscarriage right now it is NOT my fault and that is was a genetic abnormality and would've happened regardless of what I did/do. I just have to stay calm and enjoy this while I can.

And ladies I know what it's like to fight with your DH when they don't listen or don't help out or don't pay enough attention but please remember how amazing they are and that life is fragile and that they could be gone in the blink of an eye. Take time to give them a kiss and tell them you love them. Don't take for granted your time together because life is a precious gift. I wish I had told my husband I loved him just one more time.

Sorry for your loss Shanlee

 

[Blue_bumpkin]

Im so sorry for your loss Shanlee xxxx