breastfed babies result in better behaved children?

[WW1]

they don't need it rubbed in their face that they can't.

What things would count as "rubbing it in their face"? Would you count this research as doing that?

Nobody needs to explain their choices to me, or why they parent a certain way.

Totally agree. So why is it that everytime I meet other mothers and mention that I breastfeed, the mothers launch into a 20 minute presentation on why they didn't produce enough milk/their baby didn't latch/ they had a c-section/ they got trush/their milk never came in/ their nipples fell off.

It's very uncomfortable to have this every time I mention that I'm breastfeeding. I can guarantee that it happens every time I mention it (unless the other mother is a breastfeeder of course).

Why do FFers seem fixated on this? If they were secure with their choice then they wouldn't feel the need to defend it all the time. If they honestly thought that all the research/World Health Organisation/Department of Health/Unicef were talking rubbish, they they wouldn't be so "upset".[/QUOTE]

Perhaps many FF women aren't secure with their choice because it technically wasn't a choice for them. If the women you have spoken about are telling you why they couldn't BF, it suggests that they wanted to BF but couldn't. It's precisely because they know and believe the WHO info etc. that they will be trying to justify why they aren't doing it! It's very sad that any woman feels she has to justify her choices but for many women there is a stigma attached to not BFing (either real or perceived) and therefore they feel they have to "legitimise" why they are not BF.

Rather than feel uncomfortable that you are being told why someone couldn't BF, perhaps you should just feel very happy that you can!

 

[Cloberella]

I think there's defensiveness on both sides, ff's feel they need to explain why they don't bf, bf's feel like they need to tip toe around in case they offend ff's.

There is stigma on both sides but I think it's a sad day when people can't see that a report is a report, it's not been published to upset or target anyone in particular.

 

[WW1]

I think there's defensiveness on both sides, ff's feel they need to explain why they don't bf, bf's feel like they need to tip toe around in case they offend ff's.

There is stigma on both sides but I think it's a sad day when people can't see that a report is a report, it's not been published to upset or target anyone in particular.

I agree with this

 

[JASMAK]

they don't need it rubbed in their face that they can't.

What things would count as "rubbing it in their face"? Would you count this research as doing that?

Nobody needs to explain their choices to me, or why they parent a certain way.

Totally agree. So why is it that everytime I meet other mothers and mention that I breastfeed, the mothers launch into a 20 minute presentation on why they didn't produce enough milk/their baby didn't latch/ they had a c-section/ they got trush/their milk never came in/ their nipples fell off.

It's very uncomfortable to have this every time I mention that I'm breastfeeding. I can guarantee that it happens every time I mention it (unless the other mother is a breastfeeder of course).

Why do FFers seem fixated on this? If they were secure with their choice then they wouldn't feel the need to defend it all the time. If they honestly thought that all the research/World Health Organisation/Department of Health/Unicef were talking rubbish, they they wouldn't be so "upset".[/QUOTE]

Perhaps many FF women aren't secure with their choice because it technically wasn't a choice for them. If the women you have spoken about are telling you why they couldn't BF, it suggests that they wanted to BF but couldn't. It's precisely because they know and believe the WHO info etc. that they will be trying to justify why they aren't doing it! It's very sad that any woman feels she has to justify her choices but for many women there is a stigma attached to not BFing (either real or perceived) and therefore they feel they have to "legitimise" why they are not BF.

Rather than feel uncomfortable that you are being told why someone couldn't BF, perhaps you should just feel very happy that you can!

What?! Why are you jumping on me?! I am just responding to the post made by the other lady!! I am not uncomfortable! Where did I say that?! Gesh! I will just leave it to all you experts. Can't even fart without one of the members on here jumping on someone with their judgements, accusations, and wagging finger!

 

[JASMAK]

Forgot that this was in the debate section...should have known better than to come in here! Infact, thought this was the baby club. *rolls eyes and sends the royal salute*

 

[Kalah]

they don't need it rubbed in their face that they can't.

What things would count as "rubbing it in their face"? Would you count this research as doing that?

Nobody needs to explain their choices to me, or why they parent a certain way.

Totally agree. So why is it that everytime I meet other mothers and mention that I breastfeed, the mothers launch into a 20 minute presentation on why they didn't produce enough milk/their baby didn't latch/ they had a c-section/ they got trush/their milk never came in/ their nipples fell off.

It's very uncomfortable to have this every time I mention that I'm breastfeeding. I can guarantee that it happens every time I mention it (unless the other mother is a breastfeeder of course).

Why do FFers seem fixated on this? If they were secure with their choice then they wouldn't feel the need to defend it all the time. If they honestly thought that all the research/World Health Organisation/Department of Health/Unicef were talking rubbish, they they wouldn't be so "upset".

It's because they are not secure with their choice obviously. The pressure of "breast is best" being plastered on every wall of a hospital and every midwife telling you to try harder and giving looks of disappointment and disapproval if you don't succeed. It's enough to make most women feel like crap if they can't do it/don't want to/give up/whatever!

I've had perfectly normal conversation with a woman who FF and she didn't even realize I BF until half an hour into the conversation when LO got hungry! The only obvious difference is one is in a boob and one is in a bottle apart from that baby still spits up, refuses to eat, cluster feeds, etc..

To be honest I think it was unnecessary to resurrect this old thread. If you would simply have read through it all of your questions would have been answered.

 

[WW1]

they don't need it rubbed in their face that they can't.

What things would count as "rubbing it in their face"? Would you count this research as doing that?

Nobody needs to explain their choices to me, or why they parent a certain way.

Totally agree. So why is it that everytime I meet other mothers and mention that I breastfeed, the mothers launch into a 20 minute presentation on why they didn't produce enough milk/their baby didn't latch/ they had a c-section/ they got trush/their milk never came in/ their nipples fell off.

It's very uncomfortable to have this every time I mention that I'm breastfeeding. I can guarantee that it happens every time I mention it (unless the other mother is a breastfeeder of course).

Why do FFers seem fixated on this? If they were secure with their choice then they wouldn't feel the need to defend it all the time. If they honestly thought that all the research/World Health Organisation/Department of Health/Unicef were talking rubbish, they they wouldn't be so "upset".[/QUOTE]

Perhaps many FF women aren't secure with their choice because it technically wasn't a choice for them. If the women you have spoken about are telling you why they couldn't BF, it suggests that they wanted to BF but couldn't. It's precisely because they know and believe the WHO info etc. that they will be trying to justify why they aren't doing it! It's very sad that any woman feels she has to justify her choices but for many women there is a stigma attached to not BFing (either real or perceived) and therefore they feel they have to "legitimise" why they are not BF.

Rather than feel uncomfortable that you are being told why someone couldn't BF, perhaps you should just feel very happy that you can!

What?! Why are you jumping on me?! I am just responding to the post made by the other lady!! I am not uncomfortable! Where did I say that?! Gesh! I will just leave it to all you experts. Can't even fart without one of the members on here jumping on someone with their judgements, accusations, and wagging finger!

Sorry Jasmak I wasn't jumping on you at all. I was replying to crossroads responses (the ones I put in red). I quoted her response (which also included some of your quotes). I was actually agreeing with you!

My comment was lost I think as the quote thing didn't work as I wanted. hopefully it makes more sense now you know it was a response to Crossroads rather than you

 

[crossroads]

It's because they are not secure with their choice obviously.

That's their problem. There's no need to be resentful towards other women and dismiss perfectly good research. I think you've hit the nail on the head. Because they are not secure in their choice, research such as this one pushes trigger buttons of guilt.

 

[Vickie]

It's because they are not secure with their choice obviously.

That's their problem. There's no need to be resentful towards other women and dismiss perfectly good research. I think you've hit the nail on the head. Because they are not secure in their choice, research such as this one pushes trigger buttons of guilt.

You admit in your first post that you haven't even read the entire thread so what gives you the right to come in and be so judgmental about it?

It seems to me that you're looking for an argument

 

[tiger]

It's because they are not secure with their choice obviously.

That's their problem. There's no need to be resentful towards other women and dismiss perfectly good research. I think you've hit the nail on the head. Because they are not secure in their choice, research such as this one pushes trigger buttons of guilt.

You admit in your first post that you haven't even read the entire thread so what gives you the right to come in and be so judgmental about it?

It seems to me that you're looking for an argument

 

[JASMAK]

Oh OK....now I feel bad. I am sorry too!

 

[ryder]

I ff my daughter... she was advanced on every milestone and continues to be advanced for her age. She is healthy and has no allegies.

I bf my son for 6 months, and he has taken longer on every milestone, he is smaller then my daughter, he has allergies already and had excema.

And since I "only" bf him for 6 months I feel like im looked down on by alot of people because I didn't put up with the sleepless nights and all the other crap until he was 2!

Sorry, i've been on both sides of the fence and alot of bfing moms are very clique and snobbish about it. Not all, I have some friends who are great and non-judgemental... but alot of bfing moms are just snobs and make ff moms to feel like shit.

 

[venusrockstar]

alot of bfing moms are just snobs and make ff moms to feel like shit.

because what you just said didn't make anyone feel like shit

I honestly don't care how people feed their OWN baby, it's their own choice. People who get offended over valid research though is just plain silly.

I didn't put up with the sleepless nights and all the other crap until he was 2!

For the record, I am still BF'ing and I never have a sleepless night. Bella sleeps straight through the night 10-12 hours every night....so BF'ing has nothing to do with that.

 

[ryder]

I dunno about that... My son didn't sleep well while bf... as soon as he was switched to formula he slept through the night.

And the attitude you just showed by your post is exactly the kind of attitude that frustrates people.

 

[Cloberella]

I dunno about that... My son didn't sleep well while bf... as soon as he was switched to formula he slept through the night.

And the attitude you just showed by your post is exactly the kind of attitude that frustrates people.

How exactly? She's providing the same anecdotal evidence you posted when you said that your bf son has reached milestones slower than your ff daughter.

 

[WW1]

Oh OK....now I feel bad. I am sorry too!

 

[Midnight_Fairy]

My friend has BF all three of her children, ages 5, 3 & 1. None of them are well behaved!! I love them to bits, but i've never known such naughiness

I think that behaviour has more to do with how you're brought up, rather than what you ate/drank as a baby.

I have to say this about my friends kids too. I know it sounds awful but they are really naughty!

My son was BF and he has behaviour problems as he has autism. My daughter was FF and has no problems.

Load of crap tbh.

 

[AppleBlossom]

Not going to read the whole thread.

Bull. Shit.

Why do they waste money on these pointless studies, seriously?

 

[ttc_lolly]

alot of bfing moms are just snobs and make ff moms to feel like shit.

because what you just said didn't make anyone feel like shit

I honestly don't care how people feed their OWN baby, it's their own choice. People who get offended over valid research though is just plain silly.

I didn't put up with the sleepless nights and all the other crap until he was 2!

For the record, I am still BF'ing and I never have a sleepless night. Bella sleeps straight through the night 10-12 hours every night....so BF'ing has nothing to do with that.

WSS

it's comments like ryder's that make me (a FF mummy) recoil and feel ashamed (not for FF'ing, but to be put in the same 'boat' as these people)! it must almost look like to all BF mummies that's what us FF'ers think... because we don't!!! Far, far from it!

 

[Gen79]

It seems to me that you're looking for an argument

This is the debate section? Surely we shouldn't have to tiptoe in here as much as the rest of the forum? Just wondering.

Why do they waste money on these pointless studies, seriously?

They're bored? I'll bet there are some very smart people who don't think its pointless. Just because you don't like the outcome doesn't mean its without meaning to society.