Breastfeeding on Demand Support

[vietmamsie]

Anyone else BFing on demand? Wow, it is pretty intense! My daughter is literally feeding all.day.long. I feel lucky that the nights usually go well and we manage to get pretty good sleep... 10 hours with 2-3 short feeds (bed sharing really makes them easy!)

I would love to hear other mothers experiences with BFing on demand... How were the first few weeks for you? How did you get anything done? When did things start to calm down and feeding get less frequent?

 

[Becki.S]

It is intense and can be hard but the time flies by (even though it feels like years at the time!) so I would suggest u settle down with snacks, drinks and the tv/films/books!
I didn't really get anything done to be honest! But I just went with it.
It slowly gets easier, I would like to say by x week/month it's better but so many babies are different! There are also the 3/6/9 week growth spurts at the beginning which are tough. Once you're past them its miles easier! I still get some days now (nearly 5 months!) where all lo wants is booby! But they are few and far between and I enjoy those days more as I get cuddles rather than being bounced on! Lol!
If you feel you need to get things done (I'm well aware some people struggle to not do things) then get a wrap/sling that you can feed in

Becki x

 

[leigh5tom]

I wish I could settle down with snacks and TV - not quite so easy with a 2yr old to look after too!

I'm struggling with this. My 7wk old is constantly feeding & my poor 2year old is missing out BIG time. It's getting to the point where I am considering bottle feeding so if anyone can help that would be great xxx

 

[sun]

We're BF LO on demand (and tandem feeding my 2yo 2x/day). Usually LO nurses every 2h around the clock - he sometimes feeds more than that, but so far 2h is our max (day or night). I also have a 2yo and 4yo to chase, so luckily I've gotten very good at nursing one-handed while doing other things (also nursing in the wrap), since I am out most days with them or running errands. Without the wrap I wouldn't get any cooking/cleaning/laundry done I don't think! And it lets me run after them when they're out on the bikes or playing at the park. As for LO, I just nurse him wherever we are on demand. I also enlist more help from my kids (like getting diapers, putting cream on him, etc) so they feel involved when I need to be with him.

With my kids it has totally depended on the child when they fed less. My son only woke 2-3x a night from a really young age (2mo I think) so I had loads of sleep. This one is still very unsettled at night (silent reflux) so I only get about 45min at a time. I go to bed super early to compensate (9pm). But as someone above mentioned, it is really a short time! You're getting amazing sleep at night for a 1 week old, so after couple more weeks things should settle a bit more and she'll start getting into a routine. Babies can change so much at this age though in terms of what they need. Mine is nothing like he was at a week old and that was only 2 weeks ago!

 

[Feathers]

Hang in there it does get better! My DD struggled with the feeding times for the first 2-3 months honestly, but that was whether he fed for 5 minutes or 45. I took to feeding him wherever DD was playing, or we'd set up her table in front of me on the sofa so I could still play with her one handed whilst DS fed. Not perfect but the best I could do.
Now when I feed DS and it's just us DD likes to come and snuggle on my other side and watch her favourite nursery rhymes on the iPad. I think he definitely feeds more efficiently now, the first couple of months were the worst, but we still have days when we just sit and feed.
However if you bottle fed on demand you'd be spending time making and cooling and sterilising bottles so I don't see you'd save much time in the long run!

 

[lau86]

I'd say things started to calm down for us around 2-4 weeks? Up till then, if he was awake he wanted boob, people couldn't even hold him as he just cried to get back to me, for more boob!! Hubby was on paternity leave and dealt with my oldest and also the littlest slept a lot so it wasn't so bad.
Hang in there, it is so easy and convenient once baby gets a good supply

 

[vietmamsie]

Thank you! i am planning on sticking with to, i just feel like i was a little unprepared for just how demanding it would be! LO can only sleep while being held (luckily dh or a friend can satisfy this one!) and if she is up, she is on the boob! I feel so guilty ever time i gave to put her down... like to go pee, as she starts crying in seconds. At least i know she is getting enough... pees and poos like a champ! She often falls asleep with nipple in mouth which can make things a little tricky if i want to put her down! Whenever i try to pull away, she starts sucking again!

I feel really lucky she is my first... it would be impossible to do this while caring for another one!

I need to get the whole sling thing down... tried her in the sling twice, but her breathing seemed heavy so i took her out... need to keep playing with it.

 

[Veronicaco]

Totally normal, these first few weeks are intense and constant. Take refuge in the fact it gets easier, 2 and 7 weeks are major growth spurts and I remember 48 hours of constant feeding at two weeks! But I established a great milk supply and I had a nurse-in just stayed in bed and fed and rested.
I'm pregnant now again and my thoughts have gone over to how I will do this with a 2 year old who i may be tandem feeding also. I think the likely situation is I will have my mum and husband on hand to ensure I get the time to give to both and to myself!
I think there have been several times where I have felt a little oppressed by the unending cycle of feeding but it has 99%of the time been a hugely rewarding experience.
There are some great support and advice resources on Facebook too!

 

[leigh5tom]

I'm not going to lie - it's a nightmare with two lol!! xxx

 

[BigAl]

I would say no one would bf for too long if it stayed that intense! Don't worry it will calm down.

I did nothing, just sat on the sofa with a pile of snacks. Once i'd mastered reading one handed time passed a bit quicker. Wish I could do it again with my netflix subscription though. Will have a toddler this time though.

So if you can, put your feet up and don't worry about housework, it's never ending regardless of how much you do anyway.

 

[vietmamsie]

I think we are pretty lucky as we have a house cleaner twice a week. I feel like its really just about me letting go a bit! thinks have already started to change... some days less intense! It also is feeling more rewarding as we have more alert non-feeding periods with her.

 

[patch2006uk]

I'm not going to lie - it's a nightmare with two lol!! xxx

Depends on the temperament of your children. My eldest was such a hard baby - terrible wind, endless crying, woke every 60-90 mins and wouldn't be put down. My youngest is the total opposite - happy to be put down, feeds beautifully, burps easily. He's slept a few 5 hour stretches, which was unheard of with my eldest until about 6 months. I can feed in the sling this time, and one handed, which my eldest could never manage because of a crappy latch which caused nipple damage unless he was welded in place and I was sat perfectly still. Keeping the eldest entertained is hard, but that was my daily challenge before this new LO anyway. The baby hasn't been a bother in the slightest, except I'm getting a bit less sleep than I've been used to (but still more than I was expecting!!) Hope this reassures some of you as well that one difficult baby doesn't mean your second will be, too!

OP - what type of sling do you have? Maybe we can offer some pointers for you to get it more comfortable. Slings really are a saviour, and especially if you can get the hang of feeding in them! The baby days can be incredibly hard, but they don't last forever

 

[leigh5tom]

By nightmare I mean it's difficult looking after my active 2year old whilst constantly feeding my newborn x

 

[vietmamsie]

I had actually bought some rings and made my own slings. I think I might have made them a bit too wide... we live in the tropics and it feels like just too much material. I also have a Mai Tei style carrier, but I feel like she slumps down too much in it. We have an ergo as well, I think its my favorite for a newborn. We use it with a rolled up baby blanket to give her a boost and it works great, but I haven't tried nursing in it yet.

I have watched a few youtube videos on how to put the sling on better, think I might give it a go again tomorrow. Realizing that it might be the only way I manage t get some semblance of my life back!

 

[baby1wanted]

Viet I just saw your name on this post and literally yelped with excitement, you had your baby! Yay!!! So so happy for you and Lucy looks absolutely gorgeous.

Rufus is now 10 weeks old and we have been breastfeeding on demand since day one. Haven't had a chance to read the other posts so sorry if I'm repeating anything…
Like you say it is intense but it does get better! After weeks of feeding literally every 2 to 3 hours he's definitely settled down in the last four weeks I would say. He'd still happily feed every two hours during the day if I let him! But is happy to go more like 3 to 4 hours during the day. Then at night he now does one stretch of 5 to 6 hours sleep, then a feed, then another 2 to 3 hours sleep. So it does get easier

In the meantime my best suggestion is to make sure that you're always organised before you start to feed. Have a drink and a snack by your side and everything that you may need within easy reach. I used to save stuff that could only be done sitting down for during a feed. So for example replying to the emails/texts everyone was sending to congratulate us got done whilst I was feeding. I found a feeding pillow invaluable for this. I never particularly needed it to get a proper latch or to help my back but what it did do is give me two free hands which made life a lot easier!

Huge congratulations once again, after all you went through you must be absolutely over the moon. Post some pictures for us on the testing thread when you get a chance

 

[vietmamsie]

Thank you baby1!! We are so excited and love her so much! Motherhood is amazing. Totally worth the wait to get this little creature! I would do it again in a heartbeat or her!

I totally do the same thing... use the computer and what not during feedings.. typing one handed gets easier! Big mistake to sit down without a drink near by... there isn't much movement once they start! We have a BFing pillow, but she usually needs an additional little lift to get up there!

 

[vietmamsie]

ok... we are at the three week growth spurt and my little one has been feeding non stop for about 36 hours. Literally. I got 3 hours of sleep yesterday night. I managed to get in a two hour nap that she nursed through yesterday. She had about 5 20 minute cat naps throughout the day and finally got about an hour of sleep around bed time... only to wake up and nurse on and off all night long. much more 'on' time than off. is this normal?

 

[leigh5tom]

Sounds exactly like how my lb was when we had that growth spurt. I had him lie next to me in bed latched on for three nights so I could rest and family took my lg out for one of the days to help me. It will pass don't worry x x x x

 

[MoldyVoldy]

The first few weeks/months were TORTURE for me.

I cried a lot.

I wore him a lot.

Perhaps invest in a nice carrier. I used my woven wrap for 4 years

 

[dairymomma]

Viet-if you are still having trouble, check out the book Happiest Baby on the Block. It'll give you some ideas on how to get Lucy to settle down for longer stretches and hopefully allow you to get some more time for doing things. Hope she gets through this growth spurt quickly too so you can get back to a routine.