Broken hearted

[Dollybird]

Never thought is be here again but here I am. Today I've been diagnosed with a MMC. Should be 9+5 but baby passed at 8+3. Can't believe I've lost another.. I'm just heartbroken. I feel like I've failed my husband and my family. I feel.. Broken. I'm clinging to straws that it is a false diagnosis but I guess I knew in my heart this pregnancy was not to be-- right from day one. I just don't know how to bare it this time round. How to go on. How to try again. Xxx

 

[Blu10]

Sorry for your loss. Its horrid but does get easier and the need for a child begins to outweigh the fear of losing one x

 

[Dollybird]

Thankyou blu. I have a son already so I know I should be grateful for what I have, so many don't, but out of the 3 times ive been pregnant ive lost two of them. I really wanted this child, planned for it, and fooled myself into believing this time all would be ok. But I was wrong I guess or foolish, one or the other. I thought I was almost in the safe zone- id only just saw his little heart beating a week prior on scan. Xxx

 

[sunshine2014]

I'm sorry. There aren't words I can say except it's not your fault. Nothing you did or didn't do could have changed this outcome. I've had two losses myself, both mmcs and it will get easier each day. Hug your little one tight.

 

[Dollybird]

I thought having had one loss already I wouldn't possibly have another.. What a fool. And now I'm terrified it will keep happening. Xxx

 

[InTheVerse]

Never thought is be here again but here I am. Today I've been diagnosed with a MMC. Should be 9+5 but baby passed at 8+3. Can't believe I've lost another.. I'm just heartbroken. I feel like I've failed my husband and my family. I feel.. Broken. I'm clinging to straws that it is a false diagnosis but I guess I knew in my heart this pregnancy was not to be-- right from day one. I just don't know how to bare it this time round. How to go on. How to try again. Xxx

I'm so sorry Dolly, it's horrible and so unfair. You haven't failed and it isn't your fault. You aren't a fool for hoping, everyone would do the same.

 

[momwithbabies]

That's right. It is not your fault. I know the feeling of thinking it's something you did...that your body has failed you in some way. But you didn't do anything wrong.

I've only had one loss, so I can't imagine the pain of losing two babies. I hope you are able to keep your family close to you, as that's the only thing that's saved me lately.

 

[Dollybird]

Thankyou so much for your replies. ive kinda shut off to the whole thing now.. D&C still seems so far off so until then it's easier to cope by not thinking. Had big chat with my sis yesterday which was really nice. I'm going to try my best not to let this experience hold me back from having another baby, and I will not allow fear to rule my life. I loved this baby but on Thursday I will say goodbye, and try and move on. My second little angel, who I hope to meet again some day. Still got that daft wee voice saying maybe they were wrong, I can't seem to stop thinking that, which is crazy. Reading other posts in this section and having my own thoughts reflected has really helped. Makes me feel a bit less alone. Ach I'm rambling a bit.. My thoughts are a bit muddled just now xxx

 

[AnnieMac2]

I'm so sorry. Don't feel silly for thinking you wouldn't have another one. And you haven't failed anyone. I'm sure you have a family who is so thankful you brought your little boy into the world. xo

 

[Oasis717]

I feel exactly the same. I lost my baby at 12 weeks yesterday but I lost all symptoms pretty much around 9/10 weeks and I think the baby may of passed then.I feel so so devastated and I feel a failure to my husband (he doesn't think this I know) I had a loss at 6 weeks right before this pregnancy and I had two perfect scans at 6.5 and 8.5 weeks with this one. I was so so happy to see and hear the HB. This is my 7th loss since 2012. I just feel so empty. I'm so very sorry you're going through this right now xxx

 

[momwithbabies]

Feeling empty perfectly describes the pain. I'm so sorry for your loss.